[CrackMonkey] Head-freezin' 'gene clusterfuck interview!

Nick Moffitt nick at zork.net
Mon Apr 10 16:35:21 PDT 2000


	Okay, here it is.  He's still pestering me on the channel, so
I had to format this quickly.  Enjoy!

-:- genezzzz is now known as eBitch
<eBitch> boo!
<CrackMonkey> beaujolais!
<pedro> 'GENE!
<Dumont> BEAUJOLAIS!
<pedro> hey man
<eBitch> Heyhey!
<CrackMonkey> You crazy kraut, you
<CrackMonkey> hey
<pedro> i've gotta run and get the grub, cuz it's gettin' cold up at
	the Mayflower
<eBitch> Crazy? Me? No way?
<CrackMonkey> heh
<CrackMonkey> okay
<pedro> read that story eh, tell me what yout hink
-:- CrackMonkey has changed the topic on channel #tron to: The 5%
	channel of head-freezing!
<eBitch> This IRC is really disruptive.
<pedro> it's been very splitty lately
<eBitch> I can't get anything done anymore.
<CrackMonkey> hehe
<CrackMonkey> man
<eBitch> GTE DSL just had 1 h outage in SoCal and TX.
<CrackMonkey> so all the electronic communojabber is interfering with
	your head freezing?
<pedro> verio was complaining about chicago and OHIO today
<eBitch> I wish it could lasted longer. 
<eBitch> Indeed. Lots of heads on the shelf yet to freeze.
<CrackMonkey> that's a bitch
<CrackMonkey> do they thaw if you don't freeze 'em quick?
<eBitch> Actually, I have painted cabinet drawers to assemble.
<CrackMonkey> wow
<CrackMonkey> head-storin' cabinets?
<eBitch> Very exciting, eh.
<pedro> assembling cabinets is not as romantic as freezing human heads
<CrackMonkey> yeah
<CrackMonkey> we're very disappointed in you, 'gene
<eBitch> No. The heads are stored in aluminum cooking pots. With
	handles flexed off.
<pedro> i am not impressed, mr. head freezing eugene
<loiosh> wow, i'm thinking about that episode of futurama
<eBitch> I kid you not.
<CrackMonkey> we expected to see mad scientists with transparent
	casings for skulls so that you can see their brains
<eBitch> It is a cheap sturdy container.
<CrackMonkey> doesn't the metal crack under the low temp?
<loiosh> damn, you would think you would get better, isn't head
	freezing expensive?
<CrackMonkey> Somehow I thought you used purer stuff
<pedro> but if you're already paying to preserve yourself for the next
	millenia, why not go with titanium or something
<eBitch> Hmm. Acrylic skulltops would be nice. But your cortex would
	get sunburn.
<CrackMonkey> well
<CrackMonkey> you'd put in a UV filter
<pedro> right
<pedro> man, it's 3 to one here 'gene
<pedro> you're losing
<eBitch> Headfreezing is not so expensive. 40 k$, iirc.
<eBitch> Life insurance.
<CrackMonkey> oh wow
<pedro> oh yeah, hey, let me whip out that 40K i got right here
<CrackMonkey> so I can just check off "head freezing" in my life plan?
<eBitch> I need to get a life insurance, anyway. This U.S. thing is
	risky.
<CrackMonkey> yeah
<CrackMonkey> you're down in crazyland
<CrackMonkey> SoCal man
	* pedro/#tron puts a $40,000 note on the table.
<CrackMonkey> average life expectancy is like six years
<pedro> the 40,000 note has a picture of Zachary Taylor
<CrackMonkey> it is 5am
<eBitch> You can't screw you up in Krautland. Father state will
	provide. Not here.
<CrackMonkey> and you are listening
	* CrackMonkey kicks dumont
<CrackMonkey> pedro: you sure it wasn't meese?
<Dumont> to Los Angeles
<pedro> ok. STOP. really going. STOP. Will be on later. STOP
	* pedro/#tron is away: (pork!) [BX-MsgLog On]
<CrackMonkey> I dunno
<pedro> meese?
<pedro> just do it
<pedro> they're not watching
<CrackMonkey> probably someone who didn't want other folks ghosting
	flooders
<eBitch> Damn, I'm sick of going to bed at 6:00 in the morning.
<CrackMonkey> 6am?
<CrackMonkey> see, like
<CrackMonkey> I can imagine
<CrackMonkey> it's like 3am
<CrackMonkey> and you're ALONE
<CrackMonkey> in a room FULL of crock pots with HUMAN HEADS
<eBitch> With all the heads in the back, you mean.
<eBitch> The stuff is down in a dewar.
<CrackMonkey> aaah
<eBitch> Very big dewar. With an iron lid.
<pedro> eBitch: you shoudl see if they'll switch to ceramic crock pots
<eBitch> They can't come out.
<pedro> that would be cooler
<CrackMonkey> you sure they can't come out?
<CrackMonkey> okay
<CrackMonkey> so if you could get your head frozen at any facility in
	the world
<CrackMonkey> which would it be?
<eBitch> Well, sometimes they do: http://4.3.78.42/gif/earl_rm_395.gif
<eBitch> There is only Alcor. Zero choice.
<CrackMonkey> Oh yeah?
<CrackMonkey> where are they based?
<eBitch> I'm probably going to sign up with them. Got an offer I
	couldn't resist ;)
<CrackMonkey> Oh yeah?
<CrackMonkey> Early bird special on the head-freezing?
* CrackMonkey heard that vitrification destroys your teeth and jaw
<eBitch> It is not permanent, though. In case something better turns
	up or cryonics is not validated I use the insurance for
	something else.
<eBitch> Scottsdale, AZ. Soon in Rancho Cucamonga, CA.
<eBitch> Kinda. :X
<eBitch> As long as it doesn't destroy the brain, it's ok.
<CrackMonkey> But what about the rest of the nervous system?
<CrackMonkey> like, the spinal column
<CrackMonkey> and the autonomic ganglia and stuff
<eBitch> Vitrification has not yet been tried on anything else than
	rabbits. Two of them.
<CrackMonkey> oh yeah?
<loiosh> and?
<eBitch> Spinal cord just contains reflexes. 
<CrackMonkey> were they ressuscitated?
<CrackMonkey> yeah
<CrackMonkey> but those reflexes are YOUR reflexes
<eBitch> In a pinch, you can do without. Or interpolate new stuff.
<CrackMonkey> so I could take, say, Brittany Spears' spinal cord
	reflexes?
<eBitch> No, they were just went to histology. Electromicrographs.
<CrackMonkey> oh
<eBitch> Well, we're talking about far out uploading stuff.
<CrackMonkey> so, like, you make a CD with my spinal cord on it
<CrackMonkey> or like a minidisc
<CrackMonkey> I hear those are popular
<eBitch> The technology to repair the damage can interpolate a lot.
<CrackMonkey> or better yet
<eBitch> Bodies are old-fashioned anyway.
<CrackMonkey> how about a TK50 travan tape
<CrackMonkey> So when I get brought back, can I have a direct FORTH
	interface into my new vessel?
<eBitch> It would be interesting to be reanimated as a Quake figure.
<eBitch> Run, shoot, run, orelse.
<eBitch> Nice torture.
<eBitch> Thinking Forth ;)
<eBitch> I don't think you'll recognize any technologies when you come
	back.
<eBitch> It will be very, very weird.
* CrackMonkey has Thinking FORTH
<CrackMonkey> that's a great book
<eBitch> I don't think anybody will be coming back as meat puppets.
<eBitch> All humans will be dead meat, anyway.
<CrackMonkey> so will we have floating plasma quantum brain-o-bodies?
<eBitch> No, computronium modules. Very like monoliths.
<CrackMonkey> so, like N-dimensional ziggurats and shit?
<eBitch> You know molecular circuitry?
<eBitch> There is a proof for an optimal computational structure.
<eBitch> It is very much like a crystal made from primitive computing
	cells.
<eBitch> Crystalline computation, cellular automata, computronium.
<mjs> What's the optimal computational structure?
<mjs> Is it, like, quantum and stuff?
<CrackMonkey> what if I had a computronium toilet seat?
<CrackMonkey> could you make frozen-head containers out of
	computronium?
<eBitch> No, it is conventional. No qubits.
<eBitch> Not much is know about qubits yet.
<eBitch> As structural material, it is no damn good.
<loiosh> is this going to be something like in Deathkiller by Spider
	Robinson?
<mjs> No qubits? I bet it sucks then.
<eBitch> Well, maybe dark matter is really quite brilliant.
<mjs> How do you deal with the quantum wave functions of consciousness
	without qubits?
<eBitch> Maybe they need to keep cold to keep their qubit brains from
	losing entanglement.
<CrackMonkey> mjs: are you sure your AOL window isn't in front of your
	mail window?  It works fine for me without qubits!
<CrackMonkey> okay
<loiosh> what does Q*Bert have to do with frozen brains?
<CrackMonkey> so, like, we all come back as big computronium rocks
<CrackMonkey> so what?
<Dumont> so what is sark then
<eBitch> loiosh: Not much.
<Dumont> not much is know about qubits yet.
<CrackMonkey> so then some lizard men come down
<CrackMonkey> see these rocks
<CrackMonkey> and start throwing them at each other
<CrackMonkey> not knowing that they're PEOPLE
<eBitch> Dyson clouds will be made from computronium.
<eBitch> We will disassemble all planets.
<loiosh> what is the molecular weight of computronium?
<CrackMonkey> dyson clouds
<eBitch> Resistance is futile.
<CrackMonkey> so like Business 3.5 will come in mist form
<eBitch> Circumsolar clouds of monoliths in active orbits.
<mjs> CrackMonkey: AOL has no sentient life, so it doesn't need qubits
<eBitch> The cloud would be opaque, or nearly so.
<eBitch> loiosh: A cell would be about a cubic micron, or so.
<mjs> computronium green is PEOPLE!
<CrackMonkey> so you've got Esther Dyson in an opaque cloud
<CrackMonkey> and this is supposed to keep the lizard men away from
	us?
<eBitch> It is her father.
<eBitch> Freeman Dyson.
<CrackMonkey> No, that's impossible!
<CrackMonkey> Obi-wan told me you killed my father!
<eBitch> loiosh: It is covalently crosslinked, so you could say each
	crystal is a single molecule.
<CrackMonkey> so the molecular weight would be, like, two stone?
<eBitch> Like diamond. Each diamond is a single molecule.
<eBitch> Five megatons, if it needs be.
<CrackMonkey> wow
<eBitch> A diamond the size of the Ritz.
<CrackMonkey> so what if I wanted to upload my brain into a piece of
	twelve-tone serialist music?
<CrackMonkey> Would I come out completely tasteless?
<eBitch> <think of an appropriately senseless string>
<eBitch> I know it sounds silly, but I'm quite serious about all this
	crap.
<eBitch> You will be assimilated.
<CrackMonkey> Nah
<CrackMonkey> I plan to die, first
<eBitch> Good plan.
<eBitch> It will be probably not pretty.
<CrackMonkey> beaujolais to that!
<eBitch> I think Vernor Vinge painted it quite well in A Fire Upon the
	Deep.
<eBitch> The fucking Blight, man, the fucking Blight.

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