[CrackMonkey] Tell me more about the cow, though...

[Nick Moffitt]

----- Forwarded message from enigma <enigma at totse.com> -----

At 07:53 PM 9/27/00 -0700, Bonehead "the jaded one" wrote:
>	An extremely superficial glance at the innurnet reveals
>the following (just search each for "two bombs");

Big surprise. So there is nothing new under the sun after all.

Usually I only get two weeks to claim an original idea as mine before
someone else thinks up the same idea, patents it, gets VC money, goes
public and promptly goes bankrupt.

Humor is another matter altogether. It seems most people have already
heard my original jokes, long before I think of them.

I once thought of this really sick idea. I wrote it up as an AP wire
story and posted it around the Internet. It was so sick and twisted
that I figured I might actually start a new urban legend. I
*immediately* started getting e-mail back about "That's an urban
legend man, I heard about that from [so-and-so] in [insert town] back
in [insert year]. Don't believe that shit."

Of course I didn't believe it, I'm the one who made it up. What was
hard to believe was that someone else would have thought up the same
twisted story with the same sick details and try to pass it off as
fact.

For the morbidly curious, the story was about a family returning home
to find their son dead. He'd died from electrocution which resulted
from wiring up a cow's heart to electrodes to make it beat and then
fucking it.

Now if you'd thought of a story like that, wouldn't you think it was
original? Wouldn't you think you'd reached new depths of depravity and
sickness to come up with a whopper like that? I was *quite*
disappointed that time to find out that I wasn't the first to think up
the idea.

This time I'm not that disappointed. Just disgusted that the person
taking such delight in crowing about how old my joke is is someone who
has contributed nothing to Pigdog themselves.



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