[CrackMonkey] [destiny@zork.net: [Pigdog] Flex.com hates AOLers]

[Nick Moffitt]

	http://www.flex.com/sign_up/

[...]                                      
                   Notice to current America Online Users

If you are currently with America Online, please don't bother to sign
up! You have been warned...

This advice will save both you and us needless frustration. We are
incompatible with your computer system as screwed-up by AOL
configuration software and You. In fact, a lawsuit[1] is in the works
against AOL. So be warned, NO REFUNDS or CREDITS will be given.  As a
general rule, America Online users are not computer savvy or it seems,
capable of the level of technical sophistication necessary to operate
a computer outside of an AOL environment.

Recently added for David Lawrence[2] et al: If you are a competent AOL
user, congratulations!! You are welcomed to sign up if you know what
the heck you are doing. If not, go ask Dave for Tech Support.

                     "Go Ask Dave", nice ring to it... 

                          Notice to Everyone Else

If you sign up for a FlexNet account, you will only have three things
to work with: Username, Password and Modem phone number. If you have
questions after this such as: "Huh? ...What's the next step?
...Where's the Internet Menu, Anyhow? ...I just got my computer last
week! Can I call you, and have you walk me thru the setup?", then
PLEASE DON'T SIGN UP.

Remember, FlexNet does not have a technical support department. We
don't have the time to baby or pamper you. We won't let you bring your
computer down, for us to "work on it." No Ways. You have to be able to
configure your own computer, or find a friend that can do that for you
and have that friend explain what the Internet is all about and how to
do stuffs.

If you are this friend, please just don't setup the user's computer,
and split. What will eventually happen is this user will start calling
us up, asking how to read email, or other silly things like that.
There will be a lota hard feelings on both sides when we tell them to
go sign up with a full-service ISP like PixiNet or Hawaii Online or
LavaNet.

If fact, if we get a whiff when a user calls up that they are newbies,
we automatically suggest they go sign up with someone else. While this
may seem hard and cruel to you, please, PLEASE know that newbies
calling for tech support, and if FlexNet relents and gives such
requested tech support, will definitely "broke da shop" and cause
FlexNet to go out of business.

We don't offer tech support. So please don't ask for any. We are
targeting the ever-growing market of experienced Internet users.  This
is why our monthly fees are half-priced what other ISPs wanna charge
you. This is the string. That's the catch. No Joke.  Still with us?
Fine! and Thank You.

References

   1. http://www.hagens-berman.com/html/ca-aca-content-aol.htm
   2. http://www.online-tonite.com/

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