[CrackMonkey] Fucking SprintPCS fucking morons, fucking fuck!

[Mr.Bad]

What a pathetic excuse for a man you are. You are obviously an
incompetent boob who gets pushed around by large corporations on a
daily basis. You're like some kind of exhibitionist masochist: Sprint
made you their honey bitch, broke out some of your teeth, blacked your
eyes, and dragged you around on a chain, and instead of hiding your
shame you have the dim-bulb nature to trumpet about it here.

You need to copy some moves from the playbook of Mr. Bad. Mr. Bad does
not get get dicked with like you do, because Mr. Bad does not take
that kind of guff off of ANY second-rate chop-shop long distance
telco, with Sprint and its subsidiaries being no exception.

Each morning when I awaken I find my shoes freshly polished the night
before by a Sprint PCS customer service representative and placed
carefully at the foot of my bed. The newspaper is next to my plate of
waffles at the breakfast table, since it has been retrieved by another
Sprint PCS employee who has picked it up off the sidewalk and carried
it in his teeth up to my door on his hands and knees.

I have a glass of orange juice, hand-squeezed by the Sprint West Coast
VP of Sales from oranges flown on the Sprint company jet from Chile
each morning. There are 3 more VPs waiting for me in the shower in
order to loofah my back, and another group of Sprint executives at
varying levels that carry me in a sedan chair to my place of
employment each morning.

When I have need to visit my local Sprint offices on business, I am
greeted by a choir of children of all nations who sing me songs of
welcome in all their native tongues. I receive a ticker tape parade
through the corridors of Sprint on the back seat of a 72 Cadillac
convertible specially maintained for my personal use on such
occasions. When I arrive at his offices to grand applause, the Mayor
of Sprint gives me a lavish speech and a fine banquet and presents me
with the Key to the City.

*Why* do I get this kind of treatment from my cell phone company?
Because I am a DISCERNING CONSUMER and I let them know in NO UNCERTAIN
TERMS that only the utmost levels of customer service will be
acceptable to me. They are aware that only if they MEET or EXCEED my
expectations for attentiveness will they keep my business.

You, sir, need to take control of your destiny. Remember, you MAKE
your OWN reality. Awaken the giant within!

~Mr. Bad

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 /\____/\   Mr. Bad <mr.bad at pigdog.org>
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