[CrackMonkey] [[Tek] brazilian eggs]
sabetts at tiny
Sun Jul 9 19:33:54 PDT 2000
> Bryan Fullerton wrote:
> > Their study concluded that the safe location for the president was at a
> > distance of 150 to 180 feet, even if targeted by a champion egg-thrower.
> > At that distance, Folha said, a person's head would appear as large as a fly
> > 12 feet away.
> The only reason you don't hear of egg attacks on the nightly news is
> because, unlike cream pies launched by the more clown-like protesters,
> an egg gun can be easily made, unlike a cream pie, and can seriously
> injure the target immediately, whereas the cream pie takes a few years
> before causing heart disease, severe obesity, etc.
Actually I hear a group of Russian scientists have managed to build
experimental pneumatic cream pie guns, which use highly volatile
anti-matter to generate cream pies on the fly. This has lead to a new
breed of guerilla warfar between various highly secretive (and
dangerously humorous) clown groups. With the addition of high velocity
semi-automatic cream pies to the typical disgruntled protestor, it
would appear as though no politian is safe, no matter the distance.
Unfortunately, during one of their experiments the lead scientist
working on the anti-matter pie-crust pulse generators was accidentally
hit with a half formed cream pie whose contents was pure anti-matter!
The steaming heap of modern science and pastry was found later by his
colleagues who, after examining the anomaly, said it was "high in
protein and brain mass, and tastes great!". Experts predict the new
pastry called scientist-in-a-crust should be on the market by the 3rd
fiscal quarter of this year, and will be appearing in bakeries across
the country shortly after.
PhD's are advised to say indoors, and avoid bakeries.
> Best bits of my website:
> afdaFAQ - http://www.netins.net/showcase/benssite/afdafaq
> Triangle and Robert archive: http://www.netins.net/showcase/benssite/tandr/
> CrackMonkey: Non-sequitur arguments and ad-hominem personal attacks
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