%
<Zen> There should be a homonym exam before people are issued keyboards.
%
<jamesm> Subject: Re: Developing multi-threading applications
<jamesm> *plonk*
%
<pedro> ok, like
<pedro> having a wasp in the car
<pedro> is way worse than sneezing three times in a row
<emad> pedro, yeah, thats why I don't carpool
%
<Zen> I opened up GIMP and removed everything that wasn't emad.
%
I know lunch is coming, we've got to eat...
But I'm still venting my ever-growing fury!
-- Bruce Sterling
%
If it ain't broke, hit it again.
-- Chris Paget
%
<edlang> GAR
<edlang> THE CAPSLOCK KEY IS STUCK ON
<edlang> I HATE SOLARIS
%
<Luke> I want to harness jordanb's hate for sneakums and use it to
supply power to a major metropolitan city.
%
nick@pts/50> WARNING: EMADS APPROACHING!
nick@pts/50> \||/
nick@pts/50> (..)
nick@pts/50> -||-
nick@pts/50> /\
nick@pts/50> \||/
nick@pts/50> (..)
nick@pts/50> -||-
nick@pts/50> /\
nick@pts/50> \||/
nick@pts/50> (..)
nick@pts/50> -||-
nick@pts/50> /\
nick@pts/50> \||/
nick@pts/50> (..)
nick@pts/50> -||-
nick@pts/50> /\
nick@pts/50> \||/
nick@pts/50> (..)
nick@pts/50> -||-
nick@pts/50> /\
nick@pts/50> \||/
nick@pts/50> (..)
nick@pts/50> -||-
nick@pts/50> /\
nick@pts/50> ALL CLEAR
%
<CrackMonkey> if bodybuilding truly is an art, then I think most of us
in this channel qualify as surrealists.
%
BitKeeper, how quaint.
-- Alan Cox
%
<inkblot> i might look into it
<inkblot> but right now i'm DRUNK ON THE HONEY OF UUCP!
%
The Law of PHP:
No package written in PHP whose name contains or puns on the name of
the language is ever any good for anything except vigourous mockery.
%
<sneakums> "The trend is squashing the widely-held image of Australians
being sun-bronzed and superfit." <-- I'd be interested to
know where this image is held.
<Screwtape> In a bunker twenty miles below parliament house, surely.
<Screwtape> Next to the Official Metre and the Official Diddly Snike.
%
Neither did we - we think - give the gift of hubris to open
source evangelist ERIC S RAYMOND, whose personal blog - "Armed
And Dangerous" - uses logic and free thought to reach the same
certainties that sixteen pints of "Ayn's Old Prejudicial" and
a roomful of cab drivers might manage in an evening. Previous
heated debates in Eric's head have included male homosexuality
(they like little boys), the nature of Islam ("warlike and
bloody", the lot of 'em), and dietary tips (meat and two veg:
it's evolution, mate). But only this week, Eric has invented a
way that Al-Qaeda could cripple America, sworn himself and his
conspirators to dread secrecy, then reassured the world that
should bin Laden's cronies try to torture him for his secrets,
he will give them a "very short education in what the wrath of
Allah is really like". Next up: following a politically
motivated cop-shooting in California, Eric asks when *is* it
acceptable to gun down a police officer? When, he argues,
they come to round up all the guns, pornography, computers, or
Jewish people in your area. (We're guessing that should they
come for the homosexuals, Muslims, or non-Atkins dieters, get
a second opinion before opening fire.) Oh, we'd like to think
that it's just one big troll, but there's a real tone of
desperate decline to it all. It's like watching Larry Ellison
channel Charlton Heston; it's like Cliff from "Cheers" truly
going postal; but most of all, it's like finally realising you
no longer have to defend Eric S Raymond to anyone any longer.
And for that, thanks for a true gift from God.
http://armedndangerous.blogspot.com/
- what all the best-informed terrorists are reading nowadays
-- NTK now, 2002-11-29
%
Woo hoo! I'm a blogger! Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit!
-- Don Marti
%
<claviola> Bugzilla just asked me the most important question ever.
<claviola> "Why should you use this form?"
<claviola> I dunno, myself.
%
<emad> psykoyiko: i'm on to you!
<psykoyiko> emad: you're on to everyone
<emad> yep, level 2 paranoia
<emad> sneakums is level 10, its the level where you hold everyone in contempt
%
perl makes a whole lot of tasks easy to do, but if you look closely,
you will see that those tasks are fundamentally braindamaged, and
should never have been initiated.
-- Erik Naggum
%
spotting a bug in a perl program is like spotting the dog that brought
the fleas.
-- Erik Naggum
%
this is your brain. this is perl. this is your brain on perl.
any questions?
-- Erik Naggum
%
<+drwiii> i'll take week-old orange juice over the return of Jesus any day.
%
<emad> sneakums: you are one step away from calling your blog a BLAG
<emad> i'm worried :<
<sneakums> I don't have a blog.
<emad> and now you are delusional
%
<clavicle> oh please
<clavicle> <something> boom
<clavicle> <bypasser> terrorist attack!!!!
<Zen> How very USA.
<Zen> See, it's not a recent thing at all.
<Zen> If it's not terrorists
<Zen> it's corporations.
<Zen> <kids> Bang bang!
<Zen> <parents> SONY!
%
Now, when someone asks me what I do, I look them straight in the eye
and say "I'm designing a new dialect of Lisp." I recommend this
answer to anyone who doesn't like being asked what they do. The
conversation will turn immediately to other topics.
-- Paul Graham
%
<Luke> I bet sneakums drinks bitter because he is it.
%
I shoot my gun and Java be *dancin'*
Java be all IS THIS FAST ENOUGH ROAST BEEF IS THIS FAST ENOUGH
and I'm all NO
-- Roast Beef
%
It seems that a friend of mine, while in line for communion at her
church on Sunday, could think of nothing but a word I coined
off-handedly a week or two ago: transubstantialicious. One of these
days I'll learn that people /remember/ things that I say,
sometimes. It's a scary prospect.
-- Madhava Enros
%
<arturo> OK, the HPUX compiler just gave this error:
<arturo> cpp: "_unixos.h", line 600: error 4062: "I don't know yet"
%
*** sneakums [sneakums@cloaked.zork.net] has joined #kuro5hin
<sneakums> What's this chatroom for?
<RobotSlave> Oh, christ. Not this again.
%
#define MISSION_ACCOMPLISHED EXIT_SUCCESS
%
You don't have to ask me! Just employ some FAIR USE MAGIC.
-- Mr. Bad, on being sigged
%
<matticus> i like how the bbc3 guys can pronounce lutoslawski
perfectly but still mess up sigourney weaver
%
<clavicle> it's because the tilde is a key portuguese in my home language.
%
Programming languages teach you not to want what they cannot provide.
-- Paul Graham
%
<Luke> Okay, I put the SPORB GUEST COMICS up.
<Halcogeth> all one of them?!?
<Luke> Three of them.
<Luke> One's SHOCKWAVE FLASH.
<Luke> One's .jpg.
<Luke> And the other's sheer love.
<Luke> I mean .png.
<Luke> It's like I've filled my minority representation quota.
%
<deblon> this conversation deteriorated to stupid rather quickly
<Luke> So what, it has xirho in.
<Luke> That's like pouring salt on a meal and then say "This meal is
suddenly very salty".
%
<rasher> okay i need to figure out this bittorrent thing
<rasher> primarily, why it doesn't work
<rasher> oh, it fucking works!
<rasher> download rate: 4 kB/s
<rasher> upload rate: 1 kB/s
<rasher> :<
<rasher> download rate: 1 kB/s
<rasher> upload rate: 3 kB/s
<rasher> STOP THAT AT ONCE!
<rasher> download rate: 0 kB/s
<rasher> upload rate: 2 kB/s
<rasher> I am not AT ALL happy with bittorrent so far!
%
Using sched_yield() as a mutex is exactly the same as using a party
line for private conversation.
-- Mike Galbraith
%
<Jostein> if the word chortle were to be expressed with one character
or sign, it would be ~
<watson> It would not.
<watson> That character clearly indicates alternating current.
%
here is an excerpt from phik and i looking at hard drives:
phik: I don't want anything with the words "Ultra" or "Super".
me: I don't want anything with the words "Western" or "Digital".
-- http://loolix.com/2003/06/#5
%
<rasher> My name is roger the shrubber. Shrubberies are my trade. I design,
arrange and sell shrubberies.
%
<Luke> CHRIST STILL BANNED FROM #EMACS: GOD "WRATHFUL"
%
Top shelf liquors are only for drinking neat or solo on the rocks.
I know that when a lot of younger dudes get started in the bar scene
they try to go all fancy all the time, thinking this makes them look
sophisticated. All it basically does is make them look like a guy
who just paid nine dollars for two ounces of vodka, which no one who
wears a name tag on weekdays can afford to do.
-- Ray Smuckles
%
<squinky> I showed someone nmap once. He started going around nmapping
people, telling them they weren't secure.
<squinky> He didn't know what he was looking at.
<squinky> He would say "Dude, I just totally nmapped your box. You
should look into that."
%
The other day as I was sitting in a doorway with my laptop using an
open wi-fi, a small child asked me if I was homeless.
-- Murray Cumming
%
The game is so bad that the Official Playstation Magazine gave it an
eight out of ten.
-- Mark Twomey
%
<psykoyiko> <coworker> what kind of file is Oh jeee jeee?
<guinea-pig> <psykoyiko> it'll be the last thing you hear before you die
%
What is it about the human animal that compels us to share? Are we
all just egomaniacs? Are we looking to prove somehow that we're more
than just cogs in the giant machine? Are we simply venting about
stupid trivial things under the mistaken impression that anybody
cares?
Yes, yes, and yes, of course. Long live the blog. At least until
science figures out a way to graft megaphones onto our mouths, thus
allowing us to take our obsessive need to make people interested in
our lives to the next logical step.
-- James Pinkerton
%
<rasher> I said "rasher has recieved bacon" at dinner today.
<rasher> literally.. in english too
%
I don't even have an e-mail address. I have reached an age where my
main purpose is not to receive messages.
-- Umberto Eco
%
"Bogus" said Ted Longbottom, a surfer who shall remain nameful. This
exclamation, I noted, was in response to a particularly painful
'wipeout', of which a fellow Californian raisin had partaken seconds
before.
"Are you suggesting, through your usage of this term," I enquired of
him, "that all things which are bad are also somehow FABRICATED?
That, perhaps, all oppression throughout history was falsified? That
the crimes of the past were due to some erroneous typist? That the
bigotry and hatred that even now pervade our society are somewhat
questionable as regards their very EXISTENCE?"
"Dude, no," he said. "I think that guy's leg is broken."
"I think SOCIETY'S leg is broken," I retorted. "And I assure you that
the previous analogy is certainly NOT bogus." And with that, I strode
away from the young malcontent and into the nearest available open
manhole.
-- Luke Whitmore
%
Information wants to be left alone.
%
<raoul> Today I'll start a branding campaign so rigorous that nearly
everything will be connected to either you or emad in some capacity.
<drwiii> i hereby cancel your membership in the internet branding council.
turn in your ascii arrows.
%
Beware of this and that.
%
<Luke> I hate losing arguments with my browser.
<Luke> "The document contains no data." "Yes it does." "The document
contains no data." "Yes it does." "The document contains no data."
"Yes it does." "The document contains no data." "Oh, fuck you."
%
<sneakums> ha ha "when the freeze unthaws"
<rasher> Oh boy
<rasher> that's great!
<Dumont> So send it to... I... uh... sniff.
%
If a tool or codebase is unpleasant to work with, productivity will
drop. The problem is not that programmers are lazy or undisciplined,
but that we all have a mental "gag reflex" and overcoming it takes
energy. On a good day, the required energy is simply subtracted from
that which would otherwise be applied to productive work; on a bad day
it exceeds the energy available and absolutely nothing gets done.
Making programmers work on awful code is like requiring them to run an
obstacle course every hour.
-- Jeff Darcy
%
Champagne for your real friends, real pain for your sham friends.
-- Tom Waits
%
On my gravestone I want it to say "I told you I was sick".
-- Tom Waits
%
Disneyland is Vegas for children.
-- Tom Waits
%
The market is your friend. Trust the market.
%
<Atob> <shroom> wtf your nick is obnoxious
<Atob> <`_^-_`_^\^|```_-__^_\`_```> so is yours
<sneakums> hahaha
*** Atob is now known as `_^-_`_^\^|```_-__^_\`_```
*** Nick `_^-_`_^\^|```_-__^_\`_``` is already in use
<sneakums> DAMN YOU
<sneakums> DAMN YOU
<sneakums> DAMN YOU
<sneakums> DAMN YOU
<sneakums> DAMN YOU
<`_^-_`_^\^|```_-__^_\`_```> MUSHROOM MUSHROOM!
<fuzzie> yes, damn you
*** You're now known as `_^-_`_^\^|```_-__^_\`_````
<`_^-_`_^\^|```_-__^_\`_````> huk huk huk
<`_^-_`_^\^|```_-__^_\`_```> woah
<fuzzie> idiots
%
<Zenophobia> A cow is slaughtered and the prime matter becomes prime rib.
<Zenophobia> It is served to Mr. England and prime rib becomes prime minister.
<edlang> I hope there's no hair in my Blair!
%
<Luke> Other people are for hookers and fat people.
%
>>>>> "TROZ" == The Robber Of Zork <robber@zork.net> writes:
> On Sat, 11 Oct 2003 19:10:57 -0700, Nick Moffitt said:
>
>> With respect, tcsh is super backward compared to bash or zsh.
TROZ> You keep telling me that, and I keep ignoring you. I suppose
TROZ> at some point I will have to decide whether I have any good
TROZ> reason to use any particular shell rather than any other.
It's not important that you use one shell or another.
It's important that, if you use the wrong shell, you know that you
suck.
~Mr. Bad
%
<bz2> In case of sneakums, break face.
%
<Luke> With polyamory, everyone is a bit on the side.
%
<sneakums> i think you need CAP_SYS_ADMIN
<sneakums> which is a little coarse-grained for my taste
<deblon> CAPTAIN SYS ADMIN
<deblon> HE FIGHTS CRIME
%
<psykoyiko> rasher: what type of job do you do now
<rasher> psykoyiko: tv-delivery and setup
<rasher> also fetching of to-be-repaired tvs
<rasher> and returning after repairing
<Atob> BUT NOT REPAIRING
<rasher> NO NEVER THAT
%
<CrackMonkey> I'll just stick with 2.4.18-1 for now
<topato> last year called
<topato> they want their kernel back
%
<rasher> <sneakums> not bad at all <-- Irish for "I'm fucking great!"
* rasher puts down his Irish->English dictionary
%
<fuzzie> I have NT 3.51 on floppies, somewhere.
<watson> 3.51 inch floppies.
<watson> Specially designed to provide hours of frustration!
%
<watson> slow like a fox that gets caught thus stopping it from breeding
and ensuring that foxes in future tend toward being faster
%
<edlang> well, ltd is still somewhat interested and committed to linux
<jdub> does chuckd say "keepin' it INTERESTED AND COMMITTED"?
<jdub> no way motherfucker
<jdub> and why?
<jdub> because he's keepin' it REAL
%
<Luke> Google is the biggest fucking nerd in the world.
<Luke> YOUR ENCYCLOPAEDIC KNOWLEDGE DOESN'T MAKE YOU COOL
%
<Luke> "By the way, if your not a good speller, theres a spell check
you can use when posting."
<Luke> Mr. Irony's come to town and he's wearing his angry hat.
%
<Atob> What does KLM stand for?
<bz2> Koninklijke Luchtvaart Maatschappij.
%
<fuzzie> i wish udev would fuck off and die, and devfs too
<fuzzie> and we developed a new device node system, with candy, and hookers.
%
<sneakums> I'm feeling adventurous.
<sneakums> Which nutty DFSG-free MTA should I install?
<fuzzie> install postfix.
<fuzzie> i'd suggest qmail but you already ruined that troll.
<fuzzie> you git.
%
<watson> Oh, Windows Update is broke again.
<watson> How do normal people survive?
<fuzzie> By not bothering with it and getting infected with all sorts
of viruses.
<watson> Yeah, I thought that might be it.
%
I'm really surprised you're admitting to having touched that code.
I'd have guessed everyone who did would hide in his house ashamed.
-- Christoph Hellwig
%
<peaches> i made up the xml schema on the fly, it's pretty crap
<yosemite> that's what all those xml guys do
<yosemite> they just make up as they go
<yosemite> like jazz
%
<philb> I shall now reduce the size of my to-do list by
parenthetically adding (impossible) to various items
%
<Zen> There's a big conceptual difference between PC and console games.
<CrackMonkey> yeah
<CrackMonkey> it's called a keyboard
<Zen> No
<Zen> it's called Japan.
%
<sneakums> ha ha, a cellphone version of splinter cell
<Luke> Is it called Splinter Cellphone?
<Luke> Because that would be the icing on the cake.
%
<sneakums> -lilo(levin@levin-pdpc.staff.freenode)- [Global Notice] Hi all.
We're experiencing hubbing problems and we'll need to do some
rehub bing. Please bear with us.
<bz2> Yeah, you rehub bing for us, lilo.
<sneakums> rehubbing, n. 1. keeping the userbase aware of the existence
of IRC operators.
<bz2> A google search for 'rehubbing' yields like seven hits for OPN on
the front page.
%
<bz2> South West are already running trains past here.
<bz2> I presume on driver training runs.
<megan_of_wutai> "*this* is a track in wiltshire, note its parallel nature"
%
<cows> warning: the temperature on Mercury at midday is approximately 700K
<cows> do not go to Mercury. you will die.
%
<cows> I've used other people's mugs on occasion.. late at night, when no one
else is working.. the building is silent.. AND THEN I WASH THE MUG
CAREFULLY AND PUT IT AWAY
%
<bz2> "mee" is derived of the word "mede", meaning "along".
<bz2> It used to be written "me'e", like so many Dutch words that lost a D.
<bz2> ("neder" -> "ne'er" -> "neer")
<bz2> We still use the phrase "neerlands" as a sort of archaic injoke.
%
<Zen> shit, Kant fucked up
<Zen> 7+5=12 is so analytic
<Zen> WHERE DOES THE 12 COME FROM, JACKASS?
%
* MrFalcon finds it ominous that the sky is filled with birds flying
from the storm clouds.
<jotun> your people
%
<deblon> i'm a pinger, i ping out
%
<megan_of_wutai> London basically survives on pasta
<megan_of_wutai> pasta in one end, marketing materials out the other
%
<fuzzie> Ah, lightning and shouting idiots outside.
<fuzzie> Combined with cold, rain and wind.
<fuzzie> It must be England.
%
<philb> ok, what's stdin in php?
<philb> as in, I'm piping to it
<rasher> php://stdin
<rasher> fopen that
<philb> you can't be serious
<rasher> I'm dead serious.
%
<Net_Fish> suddenly i feel the need to cook some toast and put butter on it
so it melts into it
* nukle boils Net_Fish in oil.
<Net_Fish> :<<<
* Net_Fish throws nukle out into the snow, with only a pair of shorts on.
* nukle watches the snow not be there.
<nukle> or the shorts.
<nukle> :<
<Net_Fish> man, you so just trolled yourself
<nukle> it happens.
%
<oneiros> i can't decide if i've misplaced the thing that i am looking for, or
if i simply never owned it
%
Here is the memo if you didn't receive it: GNOME and Free Software is all
about *SAVING THE WORLD* not drawing pissy little buttons on the screen.
-- Jeff Waugh
%
<cows> HOORAY
<cows> FOR
<cows> I'll just leave you all in suspense.
<cows> BYE
%
<matticus> oh boy, an email from the legalise cannabis society
<Atob> Are they planning on legalising cannabis?
<matticus> that's the dream
<Atob> It's a bit of a boring dream.
<matticus> i think in the meantime we just smoke it
%
<Octal> I just crashed my calculator, so that can only mean one thing
<Octal> study break!
%
<rasher> when you can't figure out who it is, it's usually yourself
<rasher> reminds me of when I heard that every class in school has at least
one nerd
<rasher> and I was all, na, my class didn't have one
<rasher> and then...
%
<Screwtape> Are you opposed to feline development?
%
<snu> I was hilarious the other day.
<snu> lump answered the door and I asked, "do you know what snu is?"
<snu> and he was all "no, what's snu?"
<snu> and I was all "NOTHIN', WHAT'S SNU WITH YOU?!"
<snu> AHAHHAHAHAHHHAHAHA
<snu> then he punched me.
%
<squinky> I keep sitting here thinking there's a rational response to it
<squinky> but in fact, things like that can only be met with a swinging
tire iron
<sneakums> or an automatic weapon!
<squinky> those are less satisfying
<squinky> therefore less
<squinky> satisfactory
%
<vera> know whats sad?
<vera> i cant even get depressed anymore when i try
<Katnick> How depressing.
<vera> i wish
%
<philb> YOUR DALEK IS NOT SUITABLE FOR PERSONALS->DATING->MEN LOOKING FOR MEN
%
Your patch makes my computer stop working, which saddens me.
-- Andrew Morton
%
Try my SICP simulator. Close your eyes and have someone kick you in the teeth.
-- An unidentified reviewer on amazon.com
%
<bz2> Oh.
<bz2> I just found a potato.
<bz2> In my keyboard drawer.
%
<bz2> There's no good reason to share an account on any kind of Unix.
<Atob> What if you love each other?!
%
One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief
that one's work is terribly important.
-- Bertrand Russell
%
<sneakums> ha ha gentoo: 1) qmail; 2) subscriber-only lists.
<nemo> you had me at 'gentoo'
%
<Inf> My new snowboard arrived. :D
<Electric_Monk> Now all you need is snow.
<megan_of_wutai> and gravity
<megan_of_wutai> and potential energy
<peter`> and some kind of universe to run this thing in
%
I'm generally near The Presidio Mondays, from four to six (16h00-18h00),
doing what I like to call "God's Work" (which the FCC likes to call
"evil pirate broadcasting").
-- Juggler Vain
%
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them, well... I have others.
-- Groucho Marx
%
There's also no such thing as "environmentally-friendly." The
environment doesn't need friends, because it is the environment.
And even if the environment wanted friends, do you really think it
would want to be friends with you? I mean, come on, look at you.
-- Jeff Rowland
%
<sneakums> rasher: you are completely wrapped in cling-film.
<rasher> [:)]
%
I opened the door and immediately felt cool drizzle on my face. It
mingled with the sweat, diluting it, diluting the pain in my arm,
diluting everything, and I closed my eyes and let it fall. It was one
of the nicest things I've ever experienced. You might say it's a
pretty poor life I've been leading. But then, you see, context is
everything.
-- Hugh Laurie, "The Gun Seller"
%
Code deleted is code debugged.
-- Ian Bicking
%
<philb> philb's rule of remote controlled devices, the remote control
is always further away than the device being controlled
<philb> additionally, on those occasions where that, the first rule,
is not true the second rule kicks in.
<philb> that is the remote is close at hand but the device is not
cooperating, usually because of lack of electrical power.
<philb> So I then remedy the situation by walking to the device,
plugging it in and turning it on, but in order to satisfy
the first rule I MUST have the remote in my hand when I do this
<philb> It's at this point that I become distracted and leave the
remote somewhere STUPID
<philb> the third rule is actually a drwiii rule, that says that if
both of philbs rules did not apply it would mean that all the
appliances were already plugged in and switched on and they would
overheat and burn down the house
<Net_Fish> philb you missed the fourth rule that states that if all
of the above rules have been nullified then the batteries
in the remote are usualy found to be flat.
<philb> Net_Fish, good point
<philb> that HAS happened.
%
<doom> ATTENTION: I AM GOING TO CONSTRUCT AN ORTHONORMAL BASIS OF THE STATE
SPACE WITH EIGENVECTORS COMMON TO THE OBSERVABLES H AND B, WHICH COMMUTE
%
Is a Hotmail power user like a rich homeless person?
-- Wes Felter
%
<bz2> Well, don't think, it doesn't suit you.
%
<neale> I can handle a certain amount of well-intentioned ribbing
<neale> but comparing me to a butt with vampire teeth is crossing the line.
%
We no longer believe that God causes earthquakes and crop failures and
plagues when He gets mad at us. We no longer imagine that He can be
cooled off by sacrifices and festivals and gifts. I am so glad we
don't have to think up presents for Him anymore. What's the perfect
gift for someone who has everything?
-- Kurt Vonnegut
%
Bertrand Russell declared that in case he met God, he would
say to Him, "Sir, you did not give us enough information."
%
<teferi> what the?!
<teferi> why is ATA support configured as a module by default?
<teferi> I don't recall seeing an initrd anywhere
<teferi> oh, there is one.
<teferi> carry on, then
<rasher> Welcome to teferi's mental clipboard.
%
<squinky> Most of my friends consider themselves superior to aerosol
cheese. I think of myself as superior in fact to most kinds
of cheese, but not above eating them.
%
<sneakums> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<rasher> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<nukle> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<Merlin83b> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<bz2> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<rasher> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<nukle> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<Merlin83b> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<sneakums> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<rasher> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<nukle> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<rasher> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<sneakums> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
<Merlin83b> moo.
<cowbot> moo.
%
<Screwtape> o/~ Ab k'def-gee jeckle-monop-quirs tu wixiz o/~
<bz2> I rot13'ed that TWICE and it still doesn't make sense.
<Screwtape> The literal spelling is "Abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz".
%
The only long-term effect of copy protection is to ensure that those
who defeat it are immortalized.
-- Mark Pilgrim
%
While a person can hardly have too many guns, it's easy to have too
many laptops.
-- Pete Zaitcev
%
<phik> shaver: panic() drops all locks
<phik> including the printk lock, hooray!
<phik> party time in console city
%
<emad> what book is this?
<pedro> the book is "Single Variable Calculus" by James Stewart
<pedro> every time a function is integrated, an angel gets its wings
%
<peter`> The only good hack is a dirty hack
%
Get me 50 five-foot Irish actors with long upper lips.
-- Stanley Kubrick
%
<flubird> "Blogging may lead to weight gain in children"
<Rattus> good, because today's children are not built to stay on the
ground in hurricane class winds
%
<philb> so bash said "you have mail"
<philb> so I said "yes"
<philb> and it said
<philb> I won't paste
%
Influences are things to have, and then to get over.
-- William Gibson
%
No number larger than 12 ought to exist. If you see one, drop your
chalk and back away slowly. Whatever you're trying to do is more
trouble than it is worth.
-- seen in the GCC Bugzilla
%
<jotun> you know, i went to one of those goddamn things in college.
"learn networking skills! be <here> at 7pm, jun 17th!"
<jotun> there were no computers when i showed up.
%
<jotun> we will soon begin the laborious activity of netbooting 512 xserves
<jotun> netbooting an xserve takes about 20 seconds of holding down
buttons on the front
<jotun> if you're very skilled, you can turn yourself sideways and
splay your fingers to do 8 at once
<jotun> this process takes approximately all your fucking life
%
<squinky> DIRECTIONS: For best results, remove cap, hold applicator
tip close to food, press tip firmly, and move slowly across
food surface.
<squinky> I, however, maintain that the best result is to spray the
cheese directly into your mouth.
%
* Net_Fish -> sleep
<acb> piker
<nukle> sleeping with the fishes.
%
When devfs went into the tree, the word was "at least it will make
people look at the code". Well, it did. Veni, vidi, vomere.
-- Al Viro
%
From: Andrew Morton <akpm@osdl.org>
To: Jan Engelhardt <jengelh@linux01.gwdg.de>
Cc: olaf+list.linux-kernel@olafdietsche.de, eike-kernel@sf-tec.de, linux-kernel@vger.kernel.org
Date: Mon, 30 Jan 2006 01:32:14 -0800
Subject: Re: [PATCH 2.6.16-rc1-git4] accessfs: a permission managing filesystem
Jan Engelhardt <jengelh@linux01.gwdg.de> wrote:
>
> >> >> +static DECLARE_MUTEX(accessfs_sem);
> >> >
> >> >Please use a `struct mutex'.
> >>
> >> You know what's irritating? That DECLARE_MUTEX starts a semaphore and
> >> DEFINE_MUTEX a mutex.
> >
> >DECLARE_MUTEX will go away.
>
> And be replaced by... DEFINE_SEMAPHORE?
That would be logical.
%
<nukle> ^L
<sneakums> ^\
<nukle> quitter.
%
The history of criticism is a history of failure. No one at the time
understood; whether it was Stravinsky or Beethoven or Mozart, no one
knew what it was.
-- Philip Glass
%
<philb> I don't think I have enough cycles to service all the interrupts
<philb> so I'm going to give priority to some of them
<philb> and just er... make small mistakes
<philb> which hopefully won't drive the robot's actuators into some kind of
wild frenzy
<teferi> oh dear, it's a robot?
<philb> a harmless robot!
<teferi> that's what they always say
%
From: Andrew Morton <akpm@osdl.org>
Subject: Re: State of the Linux PCI and PCI Hotplug Subsystems for 2.6.16-rc5
Dave Hansen <haveblue@us.ibm.com> wrote:
> I'd put this into the "unreproducible" bucket for now.
IBM must make big buckets.
%
It's a lot like peeing in your pants to try and stay warm in a
blizzard. It may feel nice initially, but a little later on when your
legs freeze up you'll be a lot worse off than you were.
-- Jesper Juhl, on the question of improved support
for binary-only Linux drivers
%
<emad> oh so check this
<emad> my phone does powerpoint
* Spads bashes his head into the keyboard
%
I think it's OK that I don't understand everything that I've written.
-- David Byrne
%
When I split an infinitive, God damn it, I split it so it will stay split.
-- Raymond Chandler
%
<squinky> one of my friends is mildly autistic and cannot control the volume
or tone of his voice
<squinky> and he's talking about singing karaeoke on tuesday
<squinky> I am so there
%
He wore an unsettling bandanna for every photo, forcing me to
wonder, what's underneath the bandanna? Why does he need the bandanna?
What's wrong with the top of your head, brother?
-- Valerie Stivers, on David Foster Wallace
%
<emad> wooo AUSTRALIA!
<sneakums> no need to freak out.
<emad> sneakums: the only reason to go to australia is to FREAK OUT
<emad> everyone is carrying massive knives 4 times larger than you need to
kill a man, but not large enough to skin him alive
<emad> you can't walk down the street without seeing a beer bottle broken over
someone's head, sometimes your own!
<emad> sleazy surfer types are climbing the sides of buildings
<emad> AWESOME!
%
<jotun> i was reading a "proof of creationism" document, but i gave up when i
reached the phrase "would of been"
%
<squinky> I have:
<squinky> toilet paper
<squinky> pop tarts
<squinky> gatorade
<squinky> scotch
<squinky> I guess I'm all set
<Octal> Where's your emergency bacon?
<squinky> yeah, I'll try to get emergency bacon tomorrow
<squinky> hopefully there will be no bacon emergencies
<squinky> because boy would there be egg on my face
<Octal> No there wouldn't
<Octal> because you have no eggs
<squinky> it's worse than I thought
%
Some people like ASCII much better than Morse Code because it has more
redundancy but can be transmitted over a channel which is only capable of
sending binary messages in series.
This is supposed to show that computer people are both wasteful and lazy.
-- Seth David Schoen
%
If people never did silly things, nothing intelligent would ever get done.
-- Ludwig Wittgenstein
%
I'm not a control freak. I am a control /enthusiast/.
-- Joss Whedon
%
It is a bold start! A plea for help combined with a simultaneous
tri-part attack on some of the tried and true mainstays in the quest
for enlightenment. Brash accusations of google being useless.
Hubris! Maligning the source. Heresy! Disdain for the mailing list
archives. Woe.
-- Jon Loeliger
Documentation/technical/pack-heuristics.txt
in git's git tree
%
<squinky> I just pried one of my keycaps off with a screwdriver
<squinky> the keycap flew off with great speed and struck me in the eye
<squinky> and then I stabbed myself in the hand with the screwdriver
%
<squinky> oh fun
<squinky> I had my mobile phone up next to my 802.11 antenna
<squinky> and all of a suddenlike my signal done cut out
<squinky> yuk yuk
<sneakums> i put my cellphone next to my bt mouse in the middle of a call once
<sneakums> pointer went mental
<blorpy> i put my WIRELESS DEVICE near some ELECTRONICS EQUIPMENT and STUFF
HAPPENED
<squinky> blorpy does his zippy impression
<blorpy> i was just trying to share a similar anecdote :<
%
You might think I decided to go w/ asm for strange notions
of speed, but nope, I just wanted to make it non-portable.
-- Emad El-Haraty
%
<res0> [07:08:56] <Merlin83b> Are you able to add spambot ban triggers?
<res0> [07:09:03] <res0> yes.
<res0> [07:09:10] <res0> i have been doing them.
<res0> [07:09:12] <Merlin83b> Could you add http://zevk.tc.gs?
<res0> [07:09:14] -!- Merlin83b [~Daniel@cloak-40206C13.com] has quit [User
has been banned from SlashNET (Spambot)]
%
Layering is how you design networking protocols, not how you implement them.
%
<blorpy> i found a cool option in the pigdog mailing list page
<blorpy> it is called "turn off receiving mail"
%
<Spads> so now they just say "NO HOT ASH"
<Spads> which sounds giggleworthy already
<sneakums> Major Sir Ashley St. John Gigglesworth, at your service
*** Spads is now known as MajorSirAshleyStJohnGiggleswor
<MajorSirAshleyStJohnGiggleswor> SO CLOSE
%
The most important thing in the programming language is the name.
A language will not succeed without a good name. I have recently
invented a very good name and now I am looking for a suitable language.
-- Knuth
%
<nemo> SUDO SU-
<nemo> damn capslock
%
When there is a new outrage, I have to download some of my
existing outrages, to make room.
-- Al Gore
%
"Well, we've read the book of Revelation -- and here are today's
headlines -- it all fits together perfectly!!!"
%
Two major problems with ptrace are its interface and its implementation.
-- Roland McGrath
%
He whom nature has made weak, and idleness keeps ignorant, may yet
support his vanity by the name of a Critick.
-- Samuel Johnson
%
Marketing: where the rubber meets the sky.
-- Anonymous
%
Some notations will be unfortunate even when they are beautifully formatted.
-- Knuth
%
I pity the fool who has to ask me if I still pity the fool.
-- Mr. T
%
<bz2> Unhandled Exception: GConf.NoSuchKeyException:
Key '/apps/lastexit/first_run' not found in GConf
<bz2> Well, duh!
%
<blorpy> the other is to use some crazy iframe stuff
<blorpy> which is what i'm trying to do
<sneakums> the 'i' is for 'idiotic'
<fuzzie> i note that 'firefox', 'safari' and 'IE' all have 'i' in their names
<sneakums> except firefox's real name is phoenix.
<sneakums> damn.
<fuzzie> :>
<sneakums> i meant mozilla! no, firebird!
<fuzzie> what else is there? omniweb, camino
<fuzzie> mosaic, iCab
<sneakums> seamonkey!
<Dumont> seamonkey is THE WAY AND THE TRUTH AND THE LIGHT
%
The main difference between the confusion that existed ten years ago
and the confusion that exists now is that now a variety of inadequate
ontological theories have been embodied in a plethora of correspondingly
inadequate programming languages.
-- Abelson and Sussman
Structure and Interpretation of Computer Programs
%
LEO
So you wanna kill him.
DANE
For starters.
-- Miller's Crossing (1990)
%
TONY
Wake up, Tommy.
TOM
I am awake.
TONY
Your eyes were shut.
TOM
Who're you gonna believe?
-- Miller's Crossing (1990)
%
DANE
How'd you get the fat lip?
TOM
Old war wound. Acts up around morons.
-- Miller's Crossing (1990)
%
TERRY
The old man's still an artist with a Thompson.
-- Miller's Crossing (1990)
%
VERNA
You think I murdered someone.
Come on, Tom, you know me a little.
TOM
Nobody knows anybody---not that well.
-- Miller's Crossing (1990)
%
TOM
You don't hold elected office in this town.
You run it because people think you run it.
Once they stop thinking it, you stop running it.
-- Miller's Crossing (1990)
%
Meep meep!
-- Roadrunner
%
<caycos> 192 doesn't exist?
<Screwtape> Quite.
<sneakums> YET.
%
It's much easier to make a film about good and evil than to
actually recognize it.
-- Matthew Modine
%
Because I dislike being quoted I lie almost constantly when talking
about my work.
-- Terry Gilliam
%
There must be some Tommy Hilfiger event horizon, beyond which
it is impossible to be more derivative, more removed from the source,
more devoid of soul.
-- William Gibson, "Pattern Recognition"
%
Where would we be if we didn't follow the correct procedures?
%
INTERVIEWER
Do you think that the government is winning the battle
against terrorists?
HELPMANN
Oh yes. Our morale is much higher than theirs, we're
fielding all their strokes, running a lot of them out,
and pretty consistently knocking them for six. I'd say
they're nearly out of the game.
INTERVIEWER
But the bombing campaign is now in its thirteenth year...
HELPMANN
Beginner's luck!
-- Brazil (1985)
%
When I was young I never expected to be so poor that I couldn't afford a
servant, or so rich that I could afford a motor car.
-- Agatha Christie
%
<bz2> I'm at a hostel in the middle of nowhere at a mathematics camp.
<pudding> bz2: I thought the allied forces liberated the mathematics camps in 45
%
<Guest72> any one have experience with solaris?
<nukle> yes, it's terrible.
<nukle> next!
%
<peaches> "PS3: Savage Joke At Consumer Expense, Wii: Beautiful But Challenging
Media Experiment, 360: Hey Guys, Wait Up, I Can Play Games Too"
<blorpy> NeoGeo: Your butler's child will envy you more
<blorpy> too soon? is it too soon?
%
<megan_of_wutai> jwz is only really funny in the laughing at rather than
laughing with sense
<megan_of_wutai> "HEY, TELL ME HOW TO PEEL AN APPLE"
<megan_of_wutai> "well, you get an apple peeler then you peel the apple"
<megan_of_wutai> "WHEN WILL YOU FUCKING MORONS GET THAT I DON'T WANT TO DO
THAT?!!"
%
<sneakums> i guess performance goes out the window with that running
<clavicle> sneakums: yeah, but you don't notice because it's openbsd
%
<clavicle> Spads: could you install figlet?
<fuzzie> non-free, clavicle, non-free!
<clavicle> crap, I forgot *I* moved it to non-free
%
Eat flaming death, microkernel mongrels!
-- Nick Moffitt
%
As someone who's currently whacking on Mailman, I have to say I'm
getting really sick of Python. It's such a Boy Scout language, you
know?
Python puts water on the comb before combing its hair. Python brings
your mail and newspaper up the sidewalk when it comes to your
door. Python participates in student government. It's like Gallant in
"Goofus and Gallant."
Let's just say that I'm finding it very difficult to write Software
for Bad People (TM) in such a goody-two-shoes programming language.
-- Mr. Bad
%
<Wormwood> Actually, the other day, a guy here said "I wish I could get all my
windows to line up nicely', and I said "Have you tried ion?"
<Wormwood> And now he's an ion addict.
%
<Rattus> I fell asleep on the bus, had a nightmare, and woke up with that
tight feeling in my throat like I just screamed, but I am not sure if
I did, everyone on the bus was determindly looking away from me
%
<Screwtape> Hm, so I check my mail, and overnight there's a big thread on the
Twisted Python mailinglist called 'Multicast XMLRPC'.
<Screwtape> That can contain nothing but horror.
%
<blorpy> verbicide: deliberate distortion of the sense of a word (as in punning)
<blorpy> hah, with the tapestry of linguistic misuse i've racked up over the
years, i'm quilty as charged
%
Don't sass me when I'm grumpy! I'll have you slayed!
-- Ray, Achewood 2006-08-25
%
You are shamelessly parading your naivete, expecting mm/swap.c to
have something to do with swap.
-- Hugh Dickins
%
I make an iron rule: nothing escapes my bottom during play. Not a toot or a
whistle. If I play hunched over I play hunched over. I take the discomfort
in the name of dignified caution, and when it's especially bad I look up at
the sky between points and I say to the sky Thank You Sir may I have another.
Thank You Sir may I have another.
-- David Foster Wallace, "Infinite Jest"
%
"You followed me here."
"Tut. Followed is such an ugly word. I prefer 'blackmail'."
"What?"
"But, of course, it means something completely different. So all
right, let's say I followed you here."
-- Hugh Laurie, "The Gun Seller"
%
You'll excuse me -- and this is going to sound terribly rude -- but I'd find
it mind-numbingly boring if I were forced into doing nothing except talk to
you. As I said, our computational rates are highly divergent. You're not
offended, are you? I mean, it's nothing personal, I hope you understand.
-- Alastair Reynolds, "Revelation Space"
%
How low do you have to stoop in this country to be president?
-- Hunter S. Thompson
%
There are always exceptions, always excuses for stunts and
surprises. But perhaps we can agree that, as a rule, typography
should perform these services for the reader:
* invite the reader into the text;
* reveal the tenor and meaning of the text;
* clarify the structure and the order of the text;
* link the text with other existing elements;
* induce a state of energetic repose, which is the ideal
condition for reading.
-- Robert Bringhurst
/The Elements Of Typographic Style/
Hartley & Marks, 1992
%
Logotypes push typography in the direction of hieroglyphics, which tend to be
looked at rather than read. They also push it towards the realm of candy and
drugs, which tend to provoke dependent responses, and away from the realm of
food, which tends to promote autonomous being. Good typography is like bread:
ready to be admired, appraised and dissected before it consumed.
-- Robert Bringhurst
/The Elements Of Typographic Style/
Hartley & Marks, 1992
%
I got a fever! And the only prescription is MORE COWBELL!
-- Christoper Walken
%
###############################################################
#
# READ THESE NOTES BEFORE MAKING CHANGES TO THIS FILE: thanks!
#
# Since aliases are run over the yellow pages, you must issue the
# following command after modifying the file:
#
# /usr/local/newaliases
# (Alternately, type m-x compile in Emacs after editing this file.)
#
# [Note this command won't -necessarily- tell one whether the
# mailinglists file is syntactically legal -- it might just silently
# trash the mail system on all of the suns.
# WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF THE FUTURE.]
#
# Special note: Make sure all final mailing addresses have a host
# name appended to them. If they don't, sendmail will attach the
# Yellow Pages domain name on as the implied host name, which is
# incorrect. Thus, if you receive your mail on wheaties, and your
# username is johnq, use "johnq@wh" as your address. It
# will cause major lossage to just use "johnq". One other point to
# keep in mind is that any hosts outside of the "ai.mit.edu"
# domain must have fully qualified host names. Thus, "xx" is not a
# legal host name. Instead, you must use "xx.lcs.mit.edu".
# WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF THE FUTURE
#
# Special note about large lists:
# It seems from empirical observation that any list defined IN THIS
# FILE with more than fifty (50) recipients will cause newaliases to
# say "entry too large" when it's run. It doesn't tell you -which-
# list is too big, unfortunately, but if you've only been editing
# one, you have some clue. Adding the fifty-first recipient to the
# list will cause this error. The workaround is to use:include
# files as described elsewhere, which seem to have much larger or
# infinite numbers of recipients allowed. [The actual problem is
# that this file is stored in dbm(3) format for use by sendmail.
# This format limits the length of each alias to the internal block
# size (1K).]
# WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF THE FUTURE
#
# Special note about comments:
# Unlike OZ's MMAILR, you -CANNOT- stick a comment at the end of a
# line by simply prefacing it with a "#". The mailer (or newaliases)
# will think that you mean an address which just so happens to have
# a "#" in it, rather than interpreting it as a comment. This means,
# essentially, that you cannot stick comments on the same line as
# any code. This also probably means that you cannot stick a comment
# in the middle of a list definition (even on a line by itself) and
# expect the rest of the list to be properly processed.
# WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF THE FUTURE
#
###################################################################
%
You don't actually remember dying, do you? And you're fine now.
There were no ill effects.
-- Alastair Reynolds, "Redemption Ark"
%
Lack of ambition is for baseline humans.
-- Alastair Reynolds, "Redemption Ark"
%
<jp> ... when I say literalist fundamentalist, I mean literalist fuckhead
%
<clavicle> it's the first goddamn hit on google!
<megan_of_wutai> I'm expected to google your nonsense phrases now?
%
JOSE
Bad news, man.
JAMES COLE
Volunteers.
JOSE
Yeah. And they said your name.
-- Twelve Monkeys (1996)
%
<blorpy> i'm idle right now
<Glench> me too
%
<hcs> I'm working on making some code endian safe, is anyone around
with a big endian target who can test?
<godzirra> I've been told I have a big endian, but personally I think
I'm just big boned.
<hcs> quiet, you
%
'Course I eat worms! They're l-l-like little free steaks floatin' in the earth!
-- Todd, Achewood 2006-10-09
%
<SpaceHobo> design patterns are like high schooler doodles in a textbook
<sneakums> i found some old code of mine that claims something in C is a
"singleton object"
<sneakums> now i want to beat myself up
<SpaceHobo> just rewrite it to talk about trampolining and you'll be cool again
%
If a process needs to access some resource such as a buffer cache buffer
that is currently in use, it will issue a sleep() call specifying the
address of the resource it requires. A swtch() call is made to relinquish
control of the CPU, allowing another process to run. For example, to wait
on a busy buffer, the following code sequence is made:
if (bp->b_flags & B_BUSY) {
bp->b_flags |= B_WANTED;
sleep(bp, PRIBIO);
}
The address of the structure on which the process is waiting (called the
wait channel) is stored in the p_wchan field of the proc structure. The
priority argument passed to sleep() will be described in more detail
later in the chapter. Note for now though that if the priority is greater
than or equal to zero, the process may be awoken from a sleep by a signal.
A value of less than zero prevents this from happening.
When a process is about to relinquish control of a specific resource, it
looks to see if another process is waiting on the resource and issues a
corresponding wakeup() call to signal to the process that the resource is
now available. In this case, the following code sequence is invoked:
if (bp->b_flags & B_WANTED)
wakeup(bp);
To determine which process is sleeping on the resource, a scan is made
through the proc table issuing a wakeup() call for each process whose
p_wchan field is set to 'bp'.
-- Steve D. Pate
/Unix Filesystems: Evolution, Design, and Implementation/
Wiley, 2003
%
<SpaceHobo> does that say goatse rescue floppy?
<SpaceHobo> WHAT
<SpaceHobo> THE
<SpaceHobo> FUCK
%
I don't know about you, but I spend more time on a computer than I do eating.
I do creative work on a computer, communicate with other people on a computer,
devote part of my dwelling to computers, talk about them -- using a computer
is part of daily life. Part of human life. And something that's part of
human life is something that's a reasonable area to have ethical beliefs
about, just like eating is.
So don't tell me to shut up, to make my computer, and the software on it, an
ethics-free zone, just because I might choose not to accept something like a
fair-use-violating DRM system, spyware, or a one-sided proprietary EULA. What
I choose to feed my head is just as valid an area to have ethical concerns
about as what I feed my belly.
"I wish these food ethics people would keep their PERSONAL FANATICISM out of
food! Food is a BIG BUSINESS and it's TOO IMPORTANT to put RELIGIOUS FLAMING
ahead of ROI! So shut up and eat your sharecropper-grown transgenic
human/swine bone marrow patty with cheese in whisky sauce!"
No thanks. As new technologies come along, human beliefs about right and
wrong have to grow along with them. Disagree with me about what the proper
moral lines are, but as long as I'm a social human being I'm going to have
some moral lines, somewhere.
-- Don Marti
%
When in doubt, lash out.
-- Aaron's First Rule Of Pool
%
You want blog? Five dolla, bloggy bloggy! Me love you long time!
-- Cory Doctorow
%
_ _
__ _ _ __ | |_ __ _ ___| |_
/ _` | '_ \| __|____ / _` |/ _ \ __|
| (_| | |_) | ||_____| (_| | __/ |_
\__,_| .__/ \__| \__, |\___|\__|
|_| |___/
_ _ _ _
(_)_ __ ___| |_ __ _| | |
| | '_ \/ __| __/ _` | | |
| | | | \__ \ || (_| | | |
|_|_| |_|___/\__\__,_|_|_|
_ _
(_) ___ _____ _____ __ _ ___ ___| |
| |/ __/ _ \ \ /\ / / _ \/ _` / __|/ _ \ |
| | (_| __/\ V V / __/ (_| \__ \ __/ |
|_|\___\___| \_/\_/ \___|\__,_|___/\___|_|
%
*** Irssi: Starting query in slashnet with emad
<emad> hey so check this
<emad> YOUR FACE
%
<cantoocomplain> oh the way i killed the son
<cantoocomplain> it was all in the wrist
<cantoocomplain> i broke his neck as he was walking down the stairs
<cantoocomplain> and just walked out of the building
<cantoocomplain> no one ever saw me
<carlos> ah, that's no fun
<carlos> I prefer the more subtle kills even though they're more boring
<carlos> poisoning is my preferred tool
<carlos> along with pushing people over rails
<carlos> and making large objects mysteriously fall down
<Octal> or you trick them into stepping on a nail and they die of tetanus
<carlos> Octal: you can do crazy things with this game
<carlos> like cantoocomplain mentioned
<carlos> you can poison something a caterer is going to carry
<Octal> and then you accidentally kill the entire royal family of england
<Octal> or you release a butterfly and the resulting hurricane kills the target
%
<basscadet> blorpy: you ruined my gag
<basscadet> blorpy: i was going to say you had died and that your will
specified your client was to be left idling in perpetuity
<blorpy> aww
<blorpy> that would have been believable too
<blorpy> because my will does say that
%
In the process, I learned way too much about the byzantine workings of the
generic device framework in Linux, which I'm going to hurry up and forget.
It was scary. It's as if Greg wanted to test his mind's ability to retain
understanding of large chunks of seemingly random code when he wrote it.
-- Pete Zaitcev
%
<fo0bar> fyi, nfs mounts don't like it when a server disappears for a week,
then re-appears
<fo0bar> stateless my ass
%
*** emad is now known as smukaens
<smukaens> hey look at me guys!
<smukaens> i'm in a good mood most of the time!
<smukaens> i totally won't ruin your self esteem with a well timed
observation about you
%
How do you get mailings?... from the lists
1. suspects
2. elbows
-- Don Saklad
%
The Exclusion Principle is laid down purely for benefit of the electrons
themselves, who might be corrupted (and become charges or demons) if allowed
to associate too freely.
-- Alan Turing
%
<atob> Reading beat Tottenham 3-1
<MauvePornoRod> ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
<MauvePornoRod> EAT SHIT TOTTENHAM
%
<blorpy> if only the internet had some way to inform me of these facts
<blorpy> but i have no choice but to ask you
%
Did you know that U.S. lexicography even /had/ a seamy underbelly?
-- David Foster Wallace
%
<squinky> I can't believe I'm reading this
<blorpy> i know! isn't literacy great
%
<blorpy> i've found a great way to generate random numbers
<blorpy> i just ask girls for their phone numbers :<
%
<xkcd> Time to go drive past electronics stores to scream "NERDS" at
the lines of people waiting for the Wii.
<xkcd> Then go home and work on my webcomic.
%
No, I ain't got a fax machine! I also ain't got an Apple IIc,
polio, or a falcon!
-- Ray, Achewood 2006-11-22
%
Ideas are not soda cans: recycling sucks.
-- Gregory House
%
<philb> crikey, a panel has dropped open on my computer
<philb> and I didn't even know it was there
<philb> it has sockets and stuff
<philb> let me look for a moment in wonder
<philb> audio, usb and firewire of both sorts
<philb> and some cobwebs
* philb closes it for another thousand years
%
<fo0bar> *shrug* I didn't vote for him
<fo0bar> in fact, I didn't vote for any senators or congressmen
outside of my state
<fo0bar> I'm that lazy
%
It's a magical world, Hobbes, ol' buddy... let's go exploring!
-- Calvin
%
<clavicle> it's sad that he gets to be paid to be himself and give his
stupid opinion on things he doesn't know about to others.
<clavicle> we do that for free!
%
Your insight, sir, is truly stunning. That is to say, it reminds of
a sudden and unpleasant contact with something dense and misplaced.
-- Al Viro
%
<blorpy> how did you know he chose that moment to unwrap and partake
in a snickers brand candy bar?
%
* squinky is away (workies)
* CrackMonkey is away (detached)
<psykoyiko> NO WAIT
<psykoyiko> DON'T MAKE ME GO BACK TO MY REFACTORING :<
%
<Gullie> this machine just died
<Gullie> at least from a functional perspective
%
Drivers are like squirrels: happiest in the tree.
-- Don Marti
%
<hamstertesticles> okay let's get down to business
%
<philb> he's got to the taunt section of the FreeBSD install
<philb> where it locks the CD tray but simultaneously suggests that
you should remove the CD
%
<bz2> I've been redirected to the Dutch gizmodo.
<bz2> What is this horror?!
<fuzzie> It's the Dutch gizmodo.
%
Big-"L" Libertarianism is best understood not as a political
philosophy, but rather as a religion, closely akin to Scientology and
Marxism, and also, curiously, (under the name Objectivism) a sexual
perversion. (I'll bet you thought those didn't exist any more!)
-- Nathan Myers
%
A close friend of mine is a parish priest by day and an organizational
development consultant the rest of the time. Once working with IBM,
the workers were trying to convince him of what life was like in a
global hierarchical organization where the centre was remote and no
one seemed to care what you think.
"You work for Big Blue," he said. "I work for Big Black."
-- Chris Corrigan
%
<sneakums> wikipedia has extensive articles on all three
<blorpy> hah, if i want to be lied to, i'll check with my congressman
%
The mistake is that very early on, Larry decided to flatten lists by
default. Hence, if you write this:
@x = (1, 2, 3, (4, 5));
It automagically turns into (1, 2, 3, 4, 5). Convenient, eh? Sure it
is. If you want to be your own father's sister, it's extremely
convenient. If you want every file in your filesystem to be in the
root directory, it's darnright useful. It's especially advantageous
if you want to collapse the entire universe into a single electron,
since that's about all you can do with it.
-- Steve Yegge
%
Perl also has "contexts", which means that you can't trust a single
line of Perl code that you ever read.
-- Steve Yegge
%
Like any well-designed system, Perl of course has hundreds of global variables.
-- Steve Yegge
%
<SpaceHobo> xkcd: nah, just blow away any jargon file factoids
<xkcd> SpaceHobo: I didn't know that was from the jargon file, haha
<SpaceHobo> xkcd: yeah, we loaded a factpack early in dumont's life
<SpaceHobo> xkcd: and we've been slowly punching each entry in the face over
the past seven years
%
<capitalist-baldo> my wireless brings all the nerds to the yard
<Shinaku> damn right, it's faster than yours
<capitalist-baldo> if you leech from me, i'll have to charge
%
<fo0bar> Planet Debian: 92% crap, 6% Mr. Bad, 2% filler
%
<clavicle> I'm making a movie about mankind's inability to grow lemons
<clavicle> No lemons. No hope. No future.
<clavicle> Citrus of Men
%
<nornagon> h'ray for C-a S
<sneakums> ^A as the escape sure conflicts heavily with what i do
<nornagon> what do you use?
<sneakums> ^]
*** You're now known as ^]
<^]> now this is an obnoxious nick
*** nornagon is now known as ^A
<^A> Round 1, Fight!
* ^A c
* ^A c
* ^A k
* ^] Z
* ^] x
* ^A c
* ^A ^A
* ^A \
<^A> y
* ^] D
%
<emad> anyone here from eeaaartth?!
<emad> wooo earth
%
<baronsyntax> I was cleaning the screen and I think I may have used
something that soaked into it
<baronsyntax> now it's all whitewashed
<SS7> what did you use?
<SS7> bleach?
<baronsyntax> no
<baronsyntax> just this stuff that I've used on everything
<blorpy> oh. bleach.
<baronsyntax> blorpy: I'm not in a funny mood
<baronsyntax> damn, there is bleach in it
%
It is quite tiresome to delete things which your interlocutor said
and to then restate them as if it were some sort of revelation.
-- Andrew Morton
%
He was also frightened of invertebrates, marine life in general,
temperatures below freezing, fat people, people of other races, race-mixing,
slums, percussion instruments, caves, cellars, old age, great expanses of
time, monumental architecture, non-Euclidean geometry, deserts, oceans,
rats, dogs, the New England countryside, New York City, fungi and molds,
viscous substances, medical experiments, dreams, brittle textures,
gelatinous textures, the color gray, plant life of diverse sorts, memory
lapses, old books, heredity, mists, gases, whispering, whistling -- the
things that did /not/ frighten him would probably make a shorter list.
-- Luc Sante, on H.P. Lovecraft
%
Sure I can play the bass. Anyone can play the bass. It's
an idiot's instrument. It was invented so the guitarist
and the drummer would qualify for the carpool lane.
-- Téodor, Achewood 2007-01-04
%
In many books, easy exercises are found mixed randomly among extremely
difficult ones. This is sometimes unfortunate because readers like to
know in advance how long a problem might take -- otherwise they may
just skip over all the problems. A classic example of such a
situation is the book _Dynamic Programming_ by Richard Bellman; this
is an important, pioneering work in which a group of problems is
collected together at the end of some chapters under the heading
"Exercises and Research Problems," with extremely trivial questions
appearing in the midst of deep, unsolved problems. It is rumored that
someone once asked Dr. Bellman how to tell the exercises apart from
the research problems, and he replied, "If you can solve it, it is an
exercise; otherwise it's a research problem."
-- Donald E. Knuth
The Art Of Computer Programming
%
<eXistenZ> what's the difference between fakeroot and sudo?
<ikonia> eXistenZ: fakeroot is not a command, sudo is
%
<blorpy> i can hear it in the cold of the night
<blorpy> y'all bloggers wanna take my life
<blorpy> ^-- changing the n word in rap songs to blogger seems to work perfectly
%
The PS3 will instill discipline in our children and adults alike.
Everyone will know discipline.
-- Ken Kutaragi
Chairman, Sony Computer Entertainment, Inc.
%
<Octal> I went to the x10 webpage once and I couldn't tell what was
content and what was ads.
%
TSOs have been trained to not touch the monkey during the screening process.
%
<clavicle> i need to show you guys a picture of my new cat
<clavicle> she's so gosh darn cute and i named her debbie
<clavicle> in honor of debra "debian" murdock
%
Jesus! Can't you recognize bullshit? Don't you think it would
be a useful item to add to your intellectual toolkit to be
capable of saying, when a ton of wet steaming bullshit lands on
your head, "My goodness, this appears to be bullshit?"
-- Douglas MacArthur Shaftoe
%
<emad> oh
<emad> toys r nus seems to have it
<sneakums> it's a trick
<Dumont> get an axe
<emad> haha
<emad> it was a trick
<emad> they use javascript to animate a "temporarily not available" image
<emad> and i didnt have it on
%
<Spads> sneakums: I drank rather a lot last night
<Spads> sneakums: in my notebook I scrawled the following memorandum:
<Spads> TROLL SNEAKUMS RE: BLATHERSKITE
<Spads> sneakums: consider yourself trolled.
%
<megan_of_wutai> "In addition to the above, the GBA version's dialogue and menu
text also suffered from various grammatical errors; one such
example involved Suzu's "seals" becoming "steels". Also,
"Ragnarok" was mistranslated as "Kangaroo.""
<megan_of_wutai> KANGAROO, THE EPIC BATTLE THAT BRINGS ABOUT THE END OF THE
WORLD
%
<emad> accept your zinged state!
%
The problem with WMA is that the existing open source WMA implementation is
using floating point arithmetics, something that the CPU in the iRiver can't
deal with. We need to convert all calculations to fixed point, a rather
tedious and complicated task. Someone with a clue needs to step forward and
do this. The problem is that people with a clue don't use WMA.
-- Linus Nielsen Feltzing
%
Whenever a computer facility gets a new kind of computer, the programmers
embark immediately on a furious spate of activity to turn the new system
into their beloved old system.
-- Frank da Cruz and Christine Gianone
The DECSYSTEM-20 at Columbia University, 1977-1988
%
<Llorean> webguest36: I take it that's a "I haven't read the instructions" then?
<webguest36> yep
<webguest36> im very tired
<Llorean> webguest36: And magically the words we put on the screen are easier
to read than the words that were already there?
<webguest36> sorry, you lost me
%
<fo0bar> I just came across a page where someone described herself as a
"veteran blogger"
<Zen> Many soldiers who fought in the Blog Wars of 2006 are still seeking
official recognition from our government.
%
I am an old man now, and when I die and go to heaven there are two
matters on which I hope for enlightenment. One is quantum
electrodynamics, and the other is the turbulent motion of fluids.
And about the former I am rather optimistic.
-- Horace Lamb
%
<SpaceHobo> thank you, sourceforge
<SpaceHobo> thank you for creating the only list archive system *worse* than
pipermail
<SpaceHobo> the great thing is that they did it twice
%
<Octal> there might be out of band crappo, but I don't know how to check
<fo0bar> you look below the band. duh.
<Octal> Oh, I was checking to the left.
%
And now I see with eye serene
The very pulse of the machine
-- William Wordsworth
She Was a Phantom of Delight (1804)
%
<squinky> > CMU Drops Robot into Mexican Sinkhole
<squinky> ^-- a: "Take that, Robot!"
<squinky> ^-- b: "It puts the oil in the basket"
<fo0bar> squinky: lotion
<squinky> fo0bar: IT IS A ROBOT
<squinky> ROBOTS USE MOTOR OIL
<atob> It rubs the oil on its chassis
<squinky> atob: thank you
%
<megan_of_wutai> miyamoto is so weird
<squinky> he's gunna keynote at the GDC
<blorpy> ah neat
<blorpy> he's making games now?
%
Learn it, love it, lick it.
-- Jeff Garzik
%
<pdx6> did someone say barry white?
%
* tanuki saw "Epic Movie" tonight
<Zen> ...
<Dumont> [You suddenly realize it is unnaturally quiet.]
%
Top-down mandates are so twentieth-century. It's all about
emergent order now. Didn't you get the memo, I mean the gradual
percolating awareness from a zillion news and opinion sources?
-- Don Marti
%
Git bisect rocks. I'll give myself yet another pat on the back for
writing it. You can never encourage genius like that too much.
-- Linus Torvalds
%
<squinky> I want to get a weasel and teach him how to flip-flop
%
Quentin Tarantino is interested in watching someone's ear getting cut off;
David Lynch is interested in the ear.
-- David Foster Wallace
%
For Metafiction, in its ascendant and most important phases, was
really nothing more than a single-order expansion of its own great
theoretical nemesis, Realism: if Realism called it like it saw it,
Metafiction simply called it as it saw itself seeing itself see it.
-- David Foster Wallace
%
The great thing about C (still) is that you can do *anything* in it.
You're limited by hardware, and by your own abilities. Nothing else.
-- Linus Torvalds
%
If an art form is marginalized it's because it's not speaking to people.
One possible reason is that the people it's speaking to have become too
stupid to appreciate it. That seems a little easy to me.
-- David Foster Wallace
%
And take a look at the next revision. This is mostly an "align with Linux"
edition since Linux already has all the proposed new functionality. Solaris
has only a small subset and none of the other OS have anything like it.
-- Ulrich Drepper, on POSIX
%
<Octal> We had too many people for trivia, so we split up in to two teams, and
the name for the other team was The Pastafarians.
<Octal> And they got the question about what religious movement considers a
20th century Ethiopian emperor as their god.
<Octal> They got it wrong.
%
<squinky> tastes like chicken
<squinky> well, a fishy chicken
<squinky> tremendously fishy for a chicken
<squinky> it tastes like a chicken that tastes exactly like fish
%
<Octal> They really do wrap and box fudge.
%
<clavicle> As I soared high into the tag cloud Xeni Jardin carefully put up for
me, I couldn't help but wonder how high we were above the blogosphere.
%
The banana is big, but the banana skin is bigger.
%
* mikegrb deletes Octal's face
<Octal> :<
<Octal> Oh, right, I can't do that anymore.
<Octal>
%
There's a risk of getting fleas if you lie down with blogs.
-- Dan Gerstein
%
D.C. is not about solving problems. If we solved problems, there would
be nothing else left to do and we would all have to go out and do
something honest -- like fry hamburgers. No, D.C. is about keeping jobs,
which we do by /managing/ problems. There is no higher achievement than
making a problem your own, managing that problem, nurturing that problem
along until you've made it to retirement and hopefully mentored a whole
new generation of young bureaucrats to whom you can bequeath the problem.
-- Stephen Bury, "The Cobweb"
%
Our reading motto remains: anything, anytime, anywhere.
-- The Complete Review
%
The best way to get a bad order changed is to carry it out vigorously.
-- General Lucius Clay
%
Over the basic type system of a language, only Pyrrhic victories are possible.
-- Bjarne Stroustrup
%
It wasn't so much the exhibits that were depressing. There was this guy coming
out of the bathroom smoking a joint with a fanny pack and a tie-dye t-shirt on,
and it was like, "OK, rock 'n' roll is definitely dead. No question about it."
-- Andrew Bird, on visiting The Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame
%
Please use your eyes, not your tool.
-- Stephen Hemminger
%
By that time we had given up and gone back to message passing via
the network stack, which was the one kernel component that could
figure out how to get state from one CPU to another without
taking all of its clothes off and changing underwear in between.
-- Michael K. Edwards
%
Kernel AIO is not for servers. One programmer in a hundred is working on
a server codebase, and one in a thousand dares to touch server plumbing.
Kernel AIO is for clients, especially when mated to GUIs with an event
delivery mechanism. Ask yourself why the one and only thing that Windows
NT has ever gotten right about networking is I/O completion ports.
--- Michael K. Edwards
%
Gentlemen, this is my last post. You won't have Eric Raymond to kick
around any more!
-- Eric S. Raymond
%
<downs> "superior language"?
<downs> are you talking about c++?
<StoneCypher> sure am.
<downs> um.
%
ZISSOU
Please stop, Eleanor. Eleanor, stop.
Why are you leaving?
ELEANOR
Because I don't want to be part of whatever's gonna happen.
ZISSOU
Nobody knows what's going to happen. And then we film it.
That's the whole concept.
WOLODARSKY
It's how we've always done it.
-- The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou (2004)
%
ZISSOU
You know I'm not big on apologizing.
So I'll just skip it if it's all the same to you.
ELEANOR
Okay.
ZISSOU
Anyway, I'm sorry.
I know I haven't been at my best this past decade.
-- The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou (2004)
%
<clavicle> as a newbie, I don't know if I *can* vouch for you, although
it does say all it takes is "a member in good standing"
<clavicle> my member is in excellent shape.
%
It is wrong to think that the task of physics is to find out how
nature /is/. Physics concerns what we can /say/ about nature.
-- Niels Bohr
%
That's sophistication, not complexity.
-- Andrew Morton
%
Have you got two tens for a five?
-- Tom Waits
%
The Japanese language is not processed in either hemisphere of
the brain but in the left elbow, which makes for a certain
calcification of style in literary works, but no translator has
yet figured out how to convey this in a foreign language.
-- Jay Rubin
%
<SpaceHobo> pedro: notice also that most everybody else has given up
on multiple-windowed irc
<SpaceHobo> it results in too much MCM
<xkcd> MCM?
<SpaceHobo> xkcd: Multi-Channel Madness
<SpaceHobo> yeah, my boss got kind of mad at me like "you understand that
NOBODY KNOWS WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT WHEN YOU SAY MCM"
%
ALGORHYME
I think that I shall never see
A graph more lovely than a tree.
A tree whose crucial property
Is loop-free connectivity.
A tree which must be sure to span
So packets can reach every LAN.
First the Root must be selected
By ID it is elected.
Least cost paths from Root are traced
In the tree these paths are placed.
A mesh is made by folks like me.
Then bridges find a spanning tree.
-- Radia Perlman
inventor of the spanning tree algorithm
%
One day I'll write a script which unwordwraps patches and then
you'll all need to find new ways of torturing me.
-- Andrew Morton
%
util-linux (2.11z-3) unstable; urgency=low
[...]
* Drop ddate. Closes: #149321, #174459, #180737
[...]
-- LaMont Jones <lamont@debian.org> Wed, 21 May 2003 07:47:41 -0600
util-linux (2.11z-4) unstable; urgency=low
* Put ddate back in, just to keep the natives quiet.
-- LaMont Jones <lamont@debian.org> Wed, 21 May 2003 14:36:14 -0600
%
In my world, GNU/Linux is not a crappy imitation Solaris that you get to pay
out the wazoo for to Red Hat (and get no documentation and lousy tech support
that doesn't even cover your hardware). It's a full-source-code platform on
which you can engineer robust industrial and consumer products, because you
can control the freeze and release schedule component-by-component, and you
can point fix anything in the system at any time.
-- Michael K. Edwards
%
<bz2> I whip it out whenever I'm bored on the train.
%
We've already got a very nice tool that can do things like detect when we are
paravirt and optimize and patch things in a machine-specific way. It can even
reorder instructions and simulate the CPU's pipeline state and do very smart
optimizations based on that. It's a really neat thing, they call it "GCC".
-- Ingo Molnar
%
<Octal> I should probably actually do something today
<Rattus> why?
<Octal> because I don't want to end up like you.
%
<sneakums> let's get nachos
<bz2> They're mine, notcho's!
%
On second thought, maybe the "site associated with GNAA" you are
referring to is Slashdot. I feel bad for contributing to
Slashdot, but you may notice that I posted three comments in 2006
and only one so far in 2007, so I'm pretty clean here as well.
-- Sam Hocevar
%
<Screwtape> One time I logged in and discovered it was jailbait week, and
nobody told me.
%
<sneakums> christ, there's foster and allen on oink
<sneakums> in flac
<xkcd> sneakums: I can walk you through the mp3 conversion
<xkcd> so you can add it to your iTunes library
%
OK THIS FORUM SUCKS! Honestly, with the Ubuntu Linux forums
my questions get answered in mere minutes. With this forum,
I have waited over an hour with NO RESPONSE!
-- nerdman978, Rockbox Technical Forum
%
<Screwtape> Wikipedia agrees with you.
<sneakums> damn, i'm wrong :<
%
<shadebug> these pancakes might be too sweet
<relsqui> what makes you say that?
<shadebug> the intense sweetness
%
<SpaceHobo> man, we're setting up the fax tomorrow
<SpaceHobo> the whole sysadmin team is rolling our eyes
<SpaceHobo> like COME ON PEOPLE
%
<SpaceHobo> I wonder what percentage of ipv6 users have their keyboards
reconfigured for dvorak
%
between the braces
where the blood-red cursor sits
insert mode beckons
%
> + die ("cannot continue merging.");
This really isn't acceptable. We're not monotone or one of those
projects that thinks that merging is hard. Merging is *easy*.
-- Linus Torvalds
%
Rule #1 when merging should *always* be: "never leave the user high and
dry". You don't give up and say "I can't merge this". You say "I couldn't
merge this, but here's the mess I left for you to show me how it's done!"
-- Linus Torvalds
%
<Maladroit> http://zork.net/~sneakums/euthymol.jpeg <-- i like this toothpaste
<bneely> Maladroit: it ends with a comma!
<bneely> WHAT FOLLOWS?
<Maladroit> more ingredients
<bneely> i can't end my evening on irc like this
<bneely> :( :( :(
<Maladroit> bneely: the rest is "sodium saccharin, simethicone, CI 45430, +/-
sodium hydroxide"
<bneely> thanks
*** bneely has quit [bneely]
%
We're all so very pomo, we recycle cultural artifacts left and right,
we like to think we operate "under the radar" with our non-corporation
and our non-US plausible deniability. But the truth is that all it
would take to shut Debian down is one good lawsuit.
-- Michael K. Edwards
%
Bacon is simple, like a man smoking a cigarette on a train platform in
Budapest. He doesn't need you, and he doesn't care if anyone cares about
you. He's perfect at what he does, which is make everything porous smell
like him. If a wolf ate him, the wolf would be named after him. The wolf
would stink forever, and no hunter would place much value on his pelt.
-- Chris Onstad
%
<reswh0re> on another note: it kind of rocks that you guys have a gentoo
mirror. it's all super-quick.
<blorpy> unlike gentoo
<gram> too bad it still takes all that time to compile stuff
%
<megan_of_wutai> "Since it is not actual using code, there will be those who
argue that the full impact of the GPL does not come to bear
yet -- noone is "using" the code yet."
<megan_of_wutai> BZZZT, distribution, theo
<megan_of_wutai> and now we see why he chose the BSD license
<megan_of_wutai> because he DOESN'T UNDERSTAND LICENSES
%
<Ephphatha> hmm
<Ephphatha> to go out, or to stay in
<shadebug> if you stay in there could be trouble
<shadebug> conversly, to go out might lead to double that trouble
<shadebug> from a mathematical standpoint the choice seems clear
%
LIPNICK
The important thing is we want it to have
that Barton Fink feeling. We all have that
Barton Fink feeling, but since you're Barton
Fink, I'm assuming you have it in spades.
-- Barton Fink (1991)
%
CHARLIE
...Well don't look at me like that.
It's just me, Charlie.
BARTON
I hear it's Mundt. Madman Mundt?
CHARLIE
Jesus, people can be cruel...
If it's not my build, it's my personality.
-- Barton Fink (1991)
%
DEUTSCH
What else?
BARTON
He... I'm trying to think... Nothing, really...
He said he liked Jack Oakie pictures.
MASTRIONOTTI
Ya know, Fink, ordinarily we say anything you
might remember could be helpful. But I'll be
frank with you: That is not helpful.
DEUTSCH
Notice how he's not writing it down?
-- Barton Fink (1991)
%
BARTON
Have you read the Bible, Pete?
PETE
Holy Bible?
BARTON
Yeah.
PETE
I think so... Anyway, I've heard about it.
-- Barton Fink (1991)
%
LIPNICK
We're only interested in one thing, Bart. Can you
tell a story? Can you make us laugh? Can you make
us cry? Can you make us want to break out in joyous
song? Is that more than one thing? Okay!
-- Barton Fink (1991)
%
CHARLIE
Look upon me! I'll show you the life of the mind!
-- Barton Fink (1991)
%
GEISLER
Look, you're confused? You need guidance?
Talk to another writer.
BARTON
Who?
GEISLER
Jesus...
Throw a rock in here, you'll hit one.
And do me a favor, Fink: Throw it hard.
-- Barton Fink (1991)
%
CHARLIE
Come on, Barton... You think you know pain?
You think I made your life Hell? Take a look around
this dump. You're just a tourist with a typewriter,
Barton; I live here. Don't you understand that?
And you come into my home...
And you complain that I'm making too much NOISE...
-- Barton Fink (1991)
%
<cornelius> these headphones are great
<cornelius> it's like my brother isn't here
%
The amount of violence this patch manages to commit is phenomenal for
what little it actually does.
-- William Lee Irwin III
%
<neale> no I mean, for all his writing about boning and polyamourism, do you
think esr actually gets laid much?
<neale> It just strikes me as the sort of thing a guy would do to *sound* like
he's getting a lot of action.
<sneakums> neale: you know, like how he writes a lot about open source
<neale> YES
%
I have never understood "antivirus". Am I really supposed to let people
run random stuff on my computer because it doesn't pattern-match a list of
specific bad things? That's crazy talk.
-- Don Marti
%
> Uhm, I am bit confused now. Why don't you just use end_request() here?
What a question! end_request() doesn't end a request! What a crazy idea!
As far as I can tell, every name in the block layer is actually some
variant of "fuck off, this is too complicated for you to understand".
-- Rusty Russell
%
<sneakums> thank you sam hocevar for the multi-coloured dancing bananas
<SpaceHobo> where where
%
The simple fact is that if you are ever mentioned on page 1 of a Dan Brown
novel you will be mentioned with an anarthrous occupational nominal
premodifier ("Renowned linguist Geoff Pullum staggered across the savage
splendor of the forsaken Santa Cruz campus, struggling to remove the knife
plunged unnaturally into his back by a barbarous millionaire novelist"),
and you will have died a painful and horrible death by page 2, along with
several curiously ill-chosen cliches and mangled idioms.
-- Geoffrey K. Pullum
%
ZISSOU
I have no idea what you're talking about,
but I know it's bullshit.
-- The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou (2004)
%
By this time it's probably the best to pretend that I have lost the patches
and the whole project tree in a disk crash, and encourage someone to fork
it. Hey, it worked for ESR and fetchmail. It's a /vibrant/ project now...
-- Pete Zaitcev
%
<sneakums> thank you Dennis Kaarsemaker for the cheerleading bananas
<SpaceHobo> where where
%
Many users find that "more choice" adds up to "complexity" and
"uncertainty". It is therefore usually much better to provide just
one feature for a certain job than to provide two.
-- Richard Stallman, GNU Emacs maintainer
2007-04-13
%
<blorpy> shoofle == nermal
<shoofle> gleeeee
%
Fuck 'em. You can't care about every damn thing.
-- Ford Prefect
%
As I told you, I do have some weblogs, and write in them often. But
my home site is a completely different and much more impressive beast.
So I guess that you have been trolled.
--- Shlomi Fish
%
In the early 2000s, anyone I described this sort of tool to thought it
was crazy and would never work. Merge *after* commit? Branches with
*multiple* heads? *Content addresses* in history graphs? *No*
canonical servers? Now all this is the standard, and we're quibbling
over who does it fastest.
Who cares? The battle is won: DVCS technology works fantastically
well -- using the model we pioneered -- and free implementations of it
are absorbing many major projects. That's cause for celebration.
-- Graydon Hoare, Monotone Project
%
<paddlefoot> what is "victorian"
<pdx6> that means it's from the 20's
<sneakums> you know, when victoria reigned
%
<teferi> what should I have for dinner?
<jotun> singapore.
<teferi> the entire island?
<teferi> surely that's a bit piggish
<jotun> we'll all pitch in!
%
I began the picture with years of Steadicam use behind me and with the
assumption that I could do with it whatever anyone could reasonably demand.
I realized by the afternoon of the first day's work that here was a whole new
ball game, and that the word "reasonable" was not in Kubrick's lexicon.
-- Garrett Brown
%
<fo0bar> hah, ia64 is dropping on-die ia32 compatibility in favor of software
emulation
<sneakums> i thought they already used software
<megan_of_wutai> they did that about 4 years ago
<sneakums> in montecito, apparently
<sneakums> july 2006, it seems
<fo0bar> which was released in july 2006 according to the wikipedia
<megan_of_wutai> well they said they were going to do it in 2005
<megan_of_wutai> according to the article
<sneakums> okay i guess we can STOP READING WIKIPEDIA TO EACH OTHER now
%
<megan_of_wutai> ha ha nixon, that dude is so getting impeached
<megan_of_wutai> too soon?
%
<Dextrose> it's 22:33 o'clock!
<sneakums> 18:33 here.
<Dextrose> you and your loser east coast time
<sneakums> wrong.
<Dextrose> wait.
<Dextrose> wrong direction
<Dextrose> you and your loser eastern eurasia time
<sneakums> wrong.
<Dextrose> you and being in australia
<sneakums> wrong.
<Dextrose> dude fuck you, new zealand?
<sneakums> about time.
%
If you want to play the arrogant asshole and call people pedophiles I
respect that. I really do. I've been overcompensating for my low self
esteem by calling people names for twenty years. I know how it works
and the only rule is if you can't take it, don't fucking dish it out.
-- Mike Krahulik
%
In fact it is even possible to supercool water to below minus 30 degrees
centigrade. The supercooled liquid is extremely unstable, and the tiniest
nudge causes an explosion of ice crystals. One may find supercool water
and other fluids in nature. For instance, the blood of hibernating arctic
squirrels may supercool to minus 3 degrees, when it would normally congeal.
The supercooled blood still flows, since it remains a liquid, but the
slightest disturbance may cause it to freeze, killing the squirrel;
therefore, you should not disturb hibernating arctic squirrels.
-- João Magueijo, "Faster Than The Speed Of Light" (2003)
%
Henry then made a cardinal mistake: He listened to a senior scientist
who held power over his career. As a rule of thumb, one should always
assume that such people are senile.
-- João Magueijo, "Faster Than The Speed Of Light" (2003)
%
<clavicle> # Compatible with PC/Windows, Macintosh, Sun Microsystems
<clavicle> FUCK
<clavicle> now I'll have to run solaris
%
Galaxy catalogues still remain controversial. In fact, an Italian team
has been analyzing these maps to claim that for all we know the universe
is not homogeneous at all, but a fractal. If this is true, burn this
book, forget about Big Bang cosmology, and start crying convulsively.
-- João Magueijo, "Faster Than The Speed Of Light" (2003)
%
# there used to be lots of cute little log quotes from #perl in here
#
# they're gone now because they made working on this already crappy
# code even more annoying... 'HI!!! I'm from #perl and so I don't
# write understandable, maintainable code!!! You see, i'm a perl
# badass, so I try to be as obscure as possible in everything I do!'
#
# Well, welcome to the real world, guys, where code needs to be
# maintainable and sane.
%
Crucial to these breakthroughs was Andy's reckless approach. His attitude
was, the heck with all of it, let's just come up with something that has
interesting cosmological implications. If those string theorists are really
as clever as they think they are, they'll work out the details for us later.
-- João Magueijo, "Faster Than The Speed Of Light" (2003)
%
<fuzzie> trusting email to some free service sounds like delicious doom
<clavicle> fuzzie: yeah, like gmail right
<clavicle> there's only like 20 million people using webmail
<sneakums> if 20 million people jumped off a bridge, would there be a bear
shitting in the woods to hear the pope ride a tricycle?
<psykoyiko> LOOK THERE HE GOES
%
<philb> wow, Kent has been utterly shaken by an earthquake
<philb> I'll take a photo of a crack and send it to the BBC, claiming it's
earthquake damage
<philb> that should get me on news 24 as their resident expert
<philb> and probably a few seasons of my own series
%
The resulting CPU was very slow and expensive, and so Intel's plans
to replace the x86 architecture with the iAPX 432 ended miserably.
-- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intel_iAPX_432
%
<infinity> Success is almost always indicative of impending doom.
%
<blizzard> I had dinner with the guy who created EFI the other night
<cjb> blizzard: during the dinner, did he start wishing he had some kind
of piercing implement to eat with, and then proceed to design and
implement it?
%
<psykoyiko> was there no live blogging?
<squinky> there was, yeah
<squinky> but I was either too tired to blog, or what have you
<sneakums> sounds like you had your priorities straight
<squinky> like not bringing my fucking computer to a rock concert
%
Let's consider now why C is a great language.
It is commonly believed that C is a hack which was successful because
Unix was written in it. I disagree. Over a long period of time
computer architectures evolved, not because of some clever people
figuring how to evolve architectures -- as a matter of fact, clever
people were pushing tagged architectures during that period of time --
but because of the demands of different programmers to solve real
problems. Computers that were able to deal just with numbers evolved
into computers with byte-addressable memory, flat address spaces, and
pointers. This was a natural evolution reflecting the growing set of
problems that people were solving.
C, reflecting the genius of Dennis Ritchie, provided a minimal model of
the computer that had evolved over 30 years. C was not a quick hack.
As computers evolved to handle all kinds of problems, C, being the
minimal model of such a computer, became a very powerful language to
solve all kinds of problems in different domains very effectively. This
is the secret of C's portability: it is the best representation of an
abstract computer that we have.
Of course, the abstraction is done over the set of real computers, not
some imaginary computational devices. Moreover, people could understand
the machine model behind C. It is much easier for an average engineer
to understand the machine model behind C than the machine model behind
Ada or even Scheme. C succeeded because it was doing the right thing,
not because of AT&T promoting it or Unix being written with it.
-- Alex Stepanov
%
<neale> you have a busted python installation
<clavicle> I'm on a fucking livecd
<neale> *boggle*
<clavicle> this is how ubuntu rolls
<sneakums> all over your dreams
<clavicle> word
%
* Screwtape wonders if it's acceptable to describe 'listening to The
Necks' as 'Necking'.
<Screwtape> I also wonder how often they've been plagued with magazine
articles proclaming them as the 'necks big thing'.
<nornagon> off with his head
%
<Octal> "Humans are terrible athletes in terms of power and speed,
but we're phenomenal at slow and steady. We're the tortoises
of the animal kingdom," Lieberman said.
<Octal> I thought tortoises were the tortoises of the animal kingdom.
%
I fashionably decried premature optimisation in college without really
understanding it until I once committed an act of premature optimisation so
horrific that I can now tell when it is going to rain by the twinges I get
in the residual scar tissue. Now I understand premature optimisation.
-- Olin Shivers
%
* sneakums listens to the necks
<teferi> sample, if you please
<cowbot> GNNNERK GNNNERK GNNNERK GNNNERK GNNNERK
<teferi> that was strangely appropriate.
%
It's a good thing that the people in Hollywood have no souls, so that
they don't have to suffer through the lives they lead.
-- David Mamet, "On Directing Film"
%
Without Barbara Singh, Bentley Bear would still be a robot.
And the gem-eaters would still be dropping their pants.
-- Franz X. Lanzinger
%
<teferi> I was supposed to be paying attention at that meeting, but
instead I drew a giant robot monster destroying a city
%
<neale> still having trouble remembering my new password
<shoofle> neale: emad.
<neale> shoofle: that made my hard drive start to spin backwads
<neale> what do I do!
<shoofle> neale: dame emad
<shoofle> er no!
<shoofle> pewa emad
<shoofle> is what you do
<neale> oh man I did the first one
<neale> now bits are coming out of the CD-ROM drive
<shoofle> oh no!
<neale> they're all over the floor
<shoofle> umm
<neale> I hope this wasn't something I needed
<shoofle> you have to do
<neale> it sort of looks like the man page for tar
<shoofle> pewa awep dame emad
<shoofle> IT IS YOUR ONLY HOPE
<neale> okay it's stopped
<neale> thanks
%
<spork> sneakums: you know twitter?
<sneakums> yes.
<spork> i'm sorry to hear that
%
<spork> all this erlang programming has me using periods.
<spork> i feel so sophisticated
<spork> except then.
%
<spork> psykoyiko: are we meeting for luncheon tomorrow?
<spork> you have to tell me if we are
%
People who like threads are really just covering up the fact that
their processes have gotten too chubby. Put 'em on a diet, I say.
-- Larry McVoy
%
<philb> they really need to buy a proper rackmount gigabit switch
<megan_of_wutai> instead of this coke can with holes drilled in it
<philb> you'd have to drill while the can was full
<philb> or the metal would be too flexible
<philb> perhaps fill with sand or something
<philb> damn it if I'm not going to spend the rest of the day drilling
holes in coke cans
%
<Screwtape> Mmm, sax and violins.
<sneakums> love so deep, kills you in your sleep
<spork> is that a frankie muniz quote?
<sneakums> no
<spork> oh, desi arnez
<sneakums> no
<spork> oh, the parrot from aladdin
<sneakums> no
<spork> oh, the orphan manager from problem child
<sneakums> no
<spork> oh, the principal from problem child 2
<sneakums> no
<spork> oh, the talking heads
%
<ArmedBloggery> man
<ArmedBloggery> this armed mercenary standoff in jericho is insane
<Octal> insane? OR PERFECTLY RATIONAL?
<atob> Perfectly rational? OR IRRATIONALLY PERFECTIBLE?
<Screwtape> Irrationally perfectable? OR IRRADIATED POOL-TABLE?
<atob> You win this round.
%
Linux is about what people need -right now-, not what you think Linux
might need in the future; not what you think might be nice to have.
-- Jeff Garzik
%
<xkcd> bucket has been breaking a lot lately
<xkcd> 21:11 <~xkcd> Bucket: shoofle
<xkcd> 21:11 < Bucket> Ok, xkcd.
<shoofle> xkcd: it's not a broken.
<shoofle> one of the shoofle factoids is <reply>Ok, $who.
%
Choose SLAB allocator
> 1. SLAB (SLAB)
2. SLUB (Unqueued Allocator) (SLUB) (NEW)
choice[1-2?]: ?
This option allows to select a slab allocator.
Choose SLAB allocator
> 1. SLAB (SLAB)
2. SLUB (Unqueued Allocator) (SLUB) (NEW)
choice[1-2?]:
%
Given the choice between something impossible and something difficult,
I'm inclined towards picking the difficult one.
-- Matthew Garrett
%
The real objection everyone's going to have is that driver writers
will stain their shorts when faced with the rules for handling such
things. The thing is, I'm not entirely sure who these driver writers
that would have such trouble are, since the driver writers I know
personally are sophisticates rather than walking disaster areas as such
would imply. I suppose they may not be representative of the whole.
-- William Lee Irwin III
%
<emad> sneakums: do you do a lot of cooking?
<sneakums> not really
<sneakums> just very simple stuff
<emad> well i have a great way to cut a tomato without crying
<sneakums> ...
<sneakums> you mean onion?
<emad> no, tomato
<emad> the trick is to make sure your finger is clear from the knife
%
On Mon, 2007-05-21 at 22:57 +0200, Martin Koegler wrote:
> I use ISO-8859-1 as my locale, so my blobs, commits and tags are in
> this encoding.
That's a very strange thing for anyone to do in the 21st century.
Did you configure this archaic thing correctly in .git/config?
Otherwise, gitweb will assume that you're using utf-8 like any normal
person would, and of course you'll have problems when it tries to deal
with your legacy character set as if it were something sensible.
-- David Woodhouse
%
When someone with experience proposes a deal to someone with money,
too often the fellow with money ends up with the experience, and the
fellow with experience ends up with the money.
%
<emad> VHY DO YOU CRAP?
<emad> another thing the terminator didn't understand
<megan_of_wutai> at the end he realised why we crap
<megan_of_wutai> but it was something he could never do himself
%
<fo0bar> you're spending 13 nights in vegas?
<fo0bar> 1 night is too short. 3 is fine. with 13, I'd probably kill myself
<neale> I'm planning on killing myself.
%
<jotun> wow, an e-mail from newegg: "dear customer, our records show you have
opted out of receiving spam from us. please consider changing this.
sincerely, newegg"
<jotun> their signature field has a little potato wearing a smiley face
<jotun> it's probably supposed to be an egg, but it's clearly stock clipart of
a potato
%
Trust the firmware? What a piece of crap!
-- Linus Torvalds
%
<Octal> Doesn't Dr. McNinja know that the natural enemy of the zombie ninja is
the robot pirate?
<Octal> Just be sure they don't turn into ninja pirate zombie robots.
<Screwtape> Zombie ninja pirate robots?
<Octal> No.
%
#define FISSION_MAILED EXIT_FAILURE
%
<SpaceHobo> scorpy: So how's your eigenface?
<scorpy> 10% better than yours
<SpaceHobo> :O
<scorpy> :)+
%
People seemed to like this better, but only marginally so -- the
way one might prefer to be stabbed than shot. Optimally, one isn't
stabbed /or/ shot. Optimally, one eats some cake! But there are
times when cake is not available, and instead we are destroyed.
This is the deep poetry of the universe.
-- Jerry Holkins
%
Good people can build good software no matter what methodology
they use. We don't need a weight-loss pill for thin people; we
need to solve the real problem behind failure in our industry.
The bar for "acceptable" is far too low. We need to focus on
improving the skills of the less-than-good in our industry.
-- Alex Papadimoulis
%
<blorpy> nothing says quick and responsive like java
<blorpy> except for all those things that say it before java
%
There's a huge difference between "You killed my father, prepare to die",
and "Btw, I didn't like that, but I'll just continue".
And that's the difference between BUG_ON() and WARN_ON().
-- Linus Torvalds
%
<Zen> "So what does the future hold? With only five data-points, it is
hard to be sure exactly which mathematical curve is being followed."
<Zen> Man, what a hilarious approach to life.
<Zen> Everything's just a shadow of some mathematical pattern, folks.
%
But hey, like any change in there it might make reclaim better. Or worse.
Or pink with shiny spots. We just don't know.
-- Andrew Morton, on the intractability of VM hacking
%
<xkcd> holy shit
<xkcd> "he swallowed a stapler" turns up a result
<megan_of_wutai> to catch the papers
<megan_of_wutai> why oh why, did he swallow the paperclip?
%
Algorithm questions are becoming the huge warning sign, to me, that
syntax questions were in the past. If you take a job with a company
that asks you questions any idiot could answer, sooner or later they're
going to put you on a project with some idiot who answered them.
-- Giles Bowkett
%
No, I am not a hacker, nor was meant to be;
Am a simple scripter, one that will do
To write some tests, fix a bug or two.
%
The lady is the mountain behind the tiny flaming fishing cabin of the man
%
<shoofle> one male polar bear weighs about as much as 660 placentas.
%
On Mon, Jun 04, 2007 at 12:31:45PM -0400, Jeff Dike wrote:
> There's also ptrace, which (as I think Zach already mentioned) gets
> along badly with syslets.
Yeah, and I'm blissfully ignorant of ptrace. Imagine me skipping
through a field of daisies with some ptrace wolves hiding in the bushes
at the edge of the meadow. La la la.
-- Zach Brown
%
The always-surprising freakshow that is biological reality is so
awesome, so exciting and interesting, only a dullard could even wish
for Intelligent Design to be true.
-- Greg Peterson
%
<sneakums> oh, never mind, that's the device field
<sneakums> pretty much just a comment field for virtual filesystems
<sneakums> pretty much just a comment field, for virtual filesystems
<sneakums> new, less ambiguous version!
<Screwtape> A++ WOULD READ AGAIN
%
<sneakums> man, i can't reach half of the internet
<SpaceHobo> try standing up
<sneakums> nope, doesn't help
<SpaceHobo> get some kind of extension rod or broom handle to poke it with
%
If it uses free(), it needs talloc.
-- Rusty Russell
%
<emad> señor, why you call me nagios :<
%
I think describing VMS pathname syntax as "not elegant" is kind of like
describing George W. Bush as "not a genius."
-- H. Peter Anvin
%
Because people are dead, it does not follow that they were stupid.
-- David Pye
%
<jotun> I'm hungry.
<nukle> we're out of food.
<nukle> sry.
<nukle> which brings us to a list of good movies to do with mountaineering:
%
<blorpy> these macbooks are supposed to have 6 hours of battery life
<blorpy> which is well below the laptop's warranty
%
Making mistakes is inevitable, but repeating the same ones over
and over doesn't have to be. You should endeavor to make all-new,
spectacular, never-seen-before mistakes.
-- Jeff Atwood
%
It was critically acclaimed and we had a cult following, which is a
recipe for a three-digit bank account.
-- Ana Marie Cox
%
<emad> yep, that's whatever you were talking about for you
%
<emad> joey hess once produced an algorithmic way to differentiate feces from
shinola brand shoe shine products, throwing the industry into upheaval
%
<sneakums> > The nice airport with rocking chairs, power, free wifi and great
views of the the planes makes for a good couple of hours waiting for
the last flight.
<sneakums> wow
<sneakums> joey hess is so bad-ass he can blog from another dimension
%
<emad> i can picture the ms guy who thought it up in a meeting
<emad> "ok ok, how about an iphone, but 100 times the size"
<emad> "where would you put such a monstrosity!?"
<emad> "why, we'll just make it like something already huge in a home,
like a couch or waterbed"
<emad> "i know, a table!"
<emad> "genius!"
<emad> true story
%
<emad> uh oh, i can't find my f bomb
<emad> i think i dropped it
%
<pedro> i'm still pissed about that Cory Doctorow story you guys made me read
%
<sneakums> DAMN IT
<sneakums> wikipedia has no list of fictional squid
<Rattus> no wonder no one takes them seriously
%
<megan_of_wutai> apparently some dudes drove a flaming jeep cherokee into an
airport yesterday
<megan_of_wutai> that seems to be a fairly shit terrorist attack
<jotun> did it make it through customs?
<megan_of_wutai> no, jotun, it did not make it through customs
%
They told me to live free or die
I died and now I am eternally free
-- Fake Cat Power
%
<Octal> It's not like you can intimidate somebody you just shot in the face.
What are you going to do if they don't comply, shoot them in the face?
%
I remain adamant that local variables are not only useless, they are harmful.
-- Charles Moore
%
<fo0bar> I've lost a good half-dozen partitions under reiserfs; I'm picking
up the slack for people who haven't experienced a failure yet
%
<sneakums> okay, i'm off to buy a french press
<sneakums> wish me luck!
<squinky> GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR FREEDOM PRESS SNEAKUMS!
%
You may be wondering where the name originated. It might be a
Scottish name, taken from a story about two men on a train. One
man says, "What's that package up there on the baggage rack?"
And the other answers, "Oh, that's a MacGuffin."
The first one asks, "What's a MacGuffin?"
"Well," the other man says, "it's an apparatus for
trapping lions in the Scottish Highlands."
The first man says, "But there are no lions in the
Scottish Highlands," and the other one answers, "Well then, that's
no MacGuffin!"
So you see that a MacGuffin is actually nothing at all.
-- Alfred Hitchcock as quoted in
François Truffaut's book "Hitchcock"
%
GENERAL PRINCIPLES
1. No picture shall be produced that will lower the moral standards
of those who see it. Hence the sympathy of the audience should
never be thrown to the side of crime, wrongdoing, evil or sin.
2. Correct standards of life, subject only to the requirements of
drama and entertainment, shall be presented.
3. Law, natural or human, shall not be ridiculed, nor shall
sympathy be created for its violation.
%
<Octal> Overheard at Best Buy: "Can we go to the Apple store? Then you can
seeeeee what an Apple can do and I can shoooow you why I need one."
%
I aim to provide the public with beneficial shocks. Civilization has
become so protective that we're no longer able to get our goose bumps
instinctively. The only way to remove the numbness and restore our
moral equilibrium is to use artificial means to bring about the shock.
The best way to achieve that, it seems to me, is through a movie.
-- Alfred Hitchcock, in 1947
during a Hollywood press conference
%
<clavicle> well, I didn't know it broke everything I use, but that's an added
bonus
%
Linus Torvalds deciding not to take his 10,000 copyright holders
and go [GPL] v3 is like the driver of an 18-wheeler "deciding" not
to do donuts on my lawn.
-- Don Marti
%
<neale> my life is so much better since I quit reading boingboing
%
<Rattus> hmmm
<Rattus> I did not count the eyes since they are not open holes
%
Those who forget the past are condemned to repeat it.
-- Geirgeg Santayana
%
<Octal> Oh, they just made an iphone episode of Will it Blend?
<Octal> Spoiler alert!
<Octal> It does.
%
esr@thyrsus.com said:
> The engine is working. Why is it not yet time to discuss ruleset design
> and modes?
For a man who claims to hack social systems, that's an incredibly naïve
question.
-- David Woodhouse
%
<Octal> just because you should know better doesn't make it ironic.
%
I think there's a general problem of Debian people being too
polite to reveal their dislike of others.
-- Clint Adams
%
No work of art has ever done social harm, though a great deal of
social harm has been done by those who have sought to protect society
against works of art which they regarded as dangerous.
-- Stanley Kubrick
%
<Octal> But if I keep halving the distance between me and Zeno, then
eventually the distance between us will be less than my arm's
length, at which point I can punch him in the face.
%
<emad> i'm trying out this joost thing
<emad> it's just like real tv
<emad> nothing good on
%
<jotun> do we know any finns?
<Rattus> dorsal?
<jotun> i actually sighed
%
<Screwtape> These Bazooka Joe cartoons are crushing my soul.
%
<fo0bar> Octal, did you know apple is selling a cellular phone?
<Octal> fo0bar: No, I was not aware
<Octal> So, how's the 3G on that thing? I can't wait to use that to use the
internet on my bluetooth macbook whereever I go!
<fo0bar> Octal: I've heard it's great, but I don't bother. I just leave my
macbook at home and use my stereo bluetooth headset to listen to my
music on the iPhone itself!
<Octal> Wow! You mean I can just download music straight to the phone using
iTunes?
<Octal> I sure hope the unlocked iphones on ebay aren't too expensive.
<fo0bar> they do tend to jack up the price on ebay, what with the removable SD
cards they bundle into the package
<fo0bar> and extra batteries
<Screwtape> Octal: It's got a Real OS X Installation on there, so you ought to
be able to download stuff and compile it yourself, if you want to!
<Octal> fo0bar: does it have a built-in GPS or do I have to use a bluetooth GPS
module?
<fo0bar> it's built-in. I wrote a program using the OSX SDK to send my
location to my website every few minutes, where it is fed into google
maps
<Rattus> wow, now I can stalk fo0bar from the comfort of my own computer creche
<Octal> thanks to the magic of Apple's new iPhone!
%
Take note, everyone in the "blogosphere": if you want my sympathy,
make sure your writing doesn't suck.
-- D. Aline Laurie
%
A paranoid-schizophrenic is a guy who just found out what's going on.
-- William S. Burroughs
%
I'm just saying that you're trying to solve the wrong problem. Once
you solve the *right* problem, the wrong problem just goes away.
-- Linus Torvalds
%
<emad> i sure wish there was some way to transform c source to some
sort of machine code
%
<emad> ha ha
<emad> our data center powercycled
<SpaceHobo> here comes the erlang story
%
Date's Incoherence Principle:
It is impossible to treat coherently that which is incoherent.
%
So little is provably true, but so much of what people believe is
provably false, that it is far more productive to let people think
freely and meet resistance than it is to force people to subject
their opinions to resistance before the fact.
-- Erik Naggum
%
I think I'll duck this for now. Otherwise I have a suspicion that I'll
be the first person to run it and I'm too old for such excitement.
-- Andrew Morton, on receipt of a new patch
%
<atob> This is just like watching a porno. Except I can't see
anything, I haven't got a hard-on, and I want to cry.
%
<clavicle> Blizzard does make good games, you know
<clavicle> it's why they're so successful.
%
<shoofle> I sure shuffled her playlist, if you know what I mean!
<shoofle> by which I mean went on her computer and randomly reordered
her music playing order, and then I had sex with her
%
If you want a picture of the future, imagine a boot stomping on a
human face, forever.
-- George Orwell, "Nineteen Eighty-Four"
%
Now that I think about it, this is pissing into the wind, but I'd
rather die on my feet than be dry on my knees.
-- Drew McDermott
%
<philb> HOW ARE WE GOING FOR SPACE?
<philb> (from an email)
<philb> this either means they're worried about file storage, or they're
planning a moon shot
%
<Chage> pro tip: you cant execute a directory
%
O_DIRECT is French for deadlocks.
-- Chris Mason
%
I first became aware of the extent of this problem when discussing
education with a misguided university lecturer. He told me that he
felt that his purpose was to make the students believe that they had
achieved something and that this was much more important than actually
teaching them. My response was to point out that heroin and cocaine
are both good options for people who would rather feel successful than
succeed and to enquire as to whether he thought that they should be
advocated for children. The conversation ended soon after that.
-- Russell Coker
%
<megan_of_wutai> I wonder if a carbon fibre bike could break and stab right
through a man
<philb> that has happened, a lot
<megan_of_wutai> that's awesome, in an awful way
<philb> in a carbon fibre seatpost enema kind of way
<nukle> !
<nukle> pics or it didn't happen.
<philb> I don't want to see the pics, so let's pretend it didn't happen
<nukle> ok.
%
Technology is the knack of so arranging the world that we don't have
to experience it.
-- Max Frisch
%
<sneakums> crazy
<sneakums> it rains in pokemon
<megan_of_wutai> pokeland
<megan_of_wutai> IT HAS A NAME, SNEAKUMS
%
Catering to the hard-core Emacs folks is *hard*. I knew someone who
had PDP-10 assembly language in his .emacs file, and one day his
custom emacs extension worked again when he started playing with the
KLH10 PDP-10 emulator, and reused his .emacs there...
-- Ted Ts'o
%
<yosemite> also people that give themselves silly nicknames are dumb
%
<SpaceHobo> well we're doing RAID 10 on this array
<SpaceHobo> so that we can lose disks like hobo teeth and still chew our data
%
> You want metaphysical certainty?
I want sufficient analysis of this particular problem to know that
we're fixing the right thing, and in the most appropriate fashion.
As is usual when a bug report starts with the text "patch", this
is like pulling teeth.
-- Andrew Morton
%
Praising companies for providing APIs to get your own data out is like
praising auto companies for not filling your airbags with gravel.
-- Mark Pilgrim
%
Memory management is not an area for programmers looking for instant
gratification.
-- Jon Corbet, lwn.net
%
<sneakums> at home, i have a static ip
<sneakums> which was an unexpected bonus
<clavicle> static ips huh
<clavicle> bet you got public sanitation going too
<clavicle> mr. hotshot
%
<xkcd> I am as confused about the anus thing as you.
%
<jotun> moo
<cowbot> I'LL DO THAT
<cowbot> moo.
%
<mikegrb> emad I have some hot property I need you to move
<emad> let me get my oven mitts
%
Date: Wed, 4 Oct 2000 23:10:46 -0500 (CDT)
From: Emad
To: SlashNET Opers
Subject: [opers] Area51 and off/on
There seems to be a lot of confusion over area51's recent
netsplits and downtimes. I hope to clear this all up below:
[Scene 1]
Setting: 1961, Baltimore Maryland
Two men appear to be making an exchange of sorts,
both are dressed formally in business attire.
Man1: I'm sure you'll enjoy our products. This is how you know
you're in the big time. We allow you access to select
products. As you become more involved we shall
introduce you to an expanded catalog of our goods.
Man2: (russian accent) you're prices are exhorbitant but your
reputation and quality speak for themeselves. It is
an honor to do business with you, comrade.
Man1: (disgusted) We are no one's comrades.
Man2: forgive me.
Man1: I shall say good day to you.
[Scene 2]
Setting: Present Day, Somewhere in North Texas
A lone worker toils in a rather dark mine shaft
He is muttering to himself.
Worker: grr, I've gotta come here on a Sunday! I better get my
12 grains of salt and head back.
(worker takes grains of salt, and places them in a bejeweled case)
[Scene 3]
Setting: Exact Same time as previous scene, Omaha NE
College Dorm room. The door is open and you see the hallway.
You hear scraping. The camera pans out to someone who appears to
be sharpening a knife.
Student: Damn napster! Damn napster! I am so freaking lagged!
(You hear/feel a sudden boom of bass)
Student: Oh man they'll pay! They'll ALL pay!
[Scene 4]
Setting: Sometime later, Richardson, TX
Worker from scene 2 arrives at a building carrying his case.
A number of satellites cover the area around the building.
The building is shaped flat and square, almost cracker-like.
He is greated by a bespeckled man in black
Man: Do you have the all important chloride?
Worker: Yes. You're work is done. Begone with you!
Man: Yes, sir.
(Worker enters the building and locks the door behind him)
[Scene 5]
Setting: 4 days later, Baltimore, Maryland
The scene is very familiar to the first one. In fact it is in the
exact same location as scene 1. The worker is this time dressed
in business attire and is met by another character. He looks like
he is of relation to the russian guy in 1961. Possibly his son
Man: Thank you for meeting with me.
Worker: We have decided to give you a 1 year reprieve.
Doing business with us is a priviledge. Don't ruin it like
you did 29 years ago or you will wait another 30 years to hear
from us.
Man: We will take care not to make that mistake again.
(Worker and man exchange packages)
[Scene 6]
Setting: Minutes later, The offices of min.net, Server room.
You catch the glistening of a knife as the door opens
Man: mmm, Crackers!
Student: (jumps out of shadows) Give me them!
(A struggle ensues, the knife slashes wildly cutting cabling and
damaging equipment)
Man: You are not worthy!
(Area51's cable gets cut)
Man: These are more important than area51!
Student: We'll see about that!
(student begins to kick area51)
(man walks out of the room, savoring each cracker bite)
Man: ha ha, I finally see the crackers!
-=[ T H E E N D ]=-
%
I'm an Australian kernel engineer. I'm about as inspirational as a
plate of vegetables.
-- Andrew Morton
%
<Octal> "What is this?" "Modest Mouse." "What language is that?" "English."
%
<Macavity> If you want a picture of the happiest day of my life,
imagine a boot stomping Guido van Rossum's face - forever.
<fuzzie> sneakums is my favourite randomly-nick-changing person, just
because it's so trivial to work out who he is
%
If it feels good, do it.
%
If it feels good, don't do it.
%
I can't go on. I'll go on.
-- Samuel Beckett, "The Unnamable"
%
<xkcd> the limerick needs a revival
<xkcd> it's a humorous a verse without rival
<xkcd> yet the lyrical splendour
<xkcd> that it should engender
<xkcd> is absent; it fights for survival.
<xkcd> buy my book
%
ASTROPHYSICIST
You haven't become addicted, have you, Cole?
To that dying world?
COLE
No sir! I just want to do my part, to get us
back on top... in charge of the planet. And I have
the experience, I know who the people are...
-- Twelve Monkeys (1996)
%
<SpaceHobo> all nerding on hex paper on the victoria line
%
There cannot be good living where there is not good drinking.
-- Benjamin Franklin
%
Do I have more love for HP than Symbolics? Maybe. HP is
mostly just thoroughly mediocre, while Symbolics's almost
unfathomable arrogance killed an entire platform and
wasted generations of minds. Their attitude was more than
our culture can afford, and I feel very strongly that they
should not be praised for it just because the quality of
their work was by some metrics exceptional.
-- jfs, reddit.com
%
"svn does it" is usually an indication of a bad idea.
-- Al Viro
%
<SpaceHobo> the fucking ignorance I have to put up with on this channel...
<SpaceHobo> they're called "Mackertoshes" for fuck's sake
<SpaceHobo> they're a computer for big, dumb, dogshit-eating hillbillies
%
As Dr. Tufte and many others have pointed out, any audience that can
understand a typical sports or business page is going to be underwhelmed
by the data-paucity of a typical data-summary bar graph. A dozen dinky
little earthtone bars? You fellas got grant support for /that/?
-- Alexey J. Merz
%
PowerPoint has some low-end design tools helpful
in constructing PowerPoint parodies.
-- Edward Tufte
%
<megan_of_wutai> you bastard, you dropped the cocaine, what will we do now?
<foules> cocainus
<foules> ask me where you apply it
<megan_of_wutai> ...
%
<colouredplastic> did i tell you about the guy at my last job who
alphabetized /etc/passwd?
<colouredplastic> BY HAND
<colouredplastic> and CHANGED ALL THE UIDS to BE IN ORDER?
%
"Inappropriate" is the null criticism. It's merely the adjective form
of "I don't like it." That should be the highest goal for the
marginal. Be inappropriate. When you hear people saying that, you're
golden. And they, incidentally, are busted.
-- Paul Graham
%
<penryu> are there no debian squid builds with ssl?
<shoofle> I misread as "debian squid bullets"
<shoofle> I am thoroughly convinced that this is an awesome idea
%
<SpaceHobo> also, this ignores the true majesty of doublespeak you get
from TfL
<SpaceHobo> the circle line trains actually can switch onto the H&C line
<SpaceHobo> so lately they've been saying "There is a good service
operating on the Hammersmith and City line, but there are
delays between Paddington and Hammersmith."
<SpaceHobo> DOES NOT COMPUTE
<Dumont> DOES NOT COMPUTE
<SpaceHobo> GOOD SERVICE
<SpaceHobo> DELAYS
<SpaceHobo> DOES NOT COMPUTE
<Dumont> SYSTEM FAILURE IMMINENT
* SpaceHobo explodes
<Dumont> sexplodes
<SpaceHobo> thank you, Dumont
%
I thought I hated programming because I was just so sick of it... It
turns out I don't hate programming, I just hate programming in Java.
-- Russell Beattie
%
Nasty American versions of otherwise dignified foods are something of
a national tradition.
-- Tim Wu
%
In the end, I'm too lazy, and I don't care. So I can only
tell you how it _should_ be done, and maybe you can tell
somebody else until the sucker to actually do it is found.
-- Linus Torvalds
%
<Rattus> :(
<Rattus> tonights D&D session got canceled
<jotun> what the hell is d&d, and don't answer
%
<pdx6> anyone recommend any ruby (on rails) tutorials?
* SpaceHobo blinks
<emad> nice troll.
%
If you resorted to writing incomprehensible code, there's no
telling what you could do in 200 lines. These programs are not
short because they depend on programming tricks, but because
they're written using Lisp the way it's meant to be used.
-- Paul Graham, "On Lisp"
%
He claims to understand the linking process of automake/libtool now, but
I'm doubtful that anyone can and remain sane enough to feed themselves.
-- Keith Packard
%
I like "Howl" a lot. Who wouldn't? It just doesn't have much to do
with me or what happened to my friends. For one thing, I believe that
the best minds of my generation were probably musicians and physicists
and mathematicians and biologists and archaeologists and chess masters
and so on, and Ginsberg's closest friends, if I'm not mistaken, were
undergraduates in the English department of Columbia University.
No offense intended, but it would never occur to me to look for the
best minds in any generation in an undergraduate English department
anywhere. I would certainly try the physics department or the music
department first -- and after that biochemistry. Everybody knows that
the dumbest people in any American university are in the education
department, and English after that.
-- Kurt Vonnegut
%
Burning Man has become just as nefarious a cultural programmer as
General Electric or Disney.
-- Paul Addis
%
<teferi> but I did find a memory leak in glassfish
<sneakums> <teferi> turns out it uses java
<teferi> thank you, peanut gallery
%
*** mode/#tron [+b *!*rattus@*.hsd1.mn.comcast.net] by sneakums
*** Rattus was kicked from #tron by sneakums [fuck you and your shitty factoids]
<emad> ha ha
<emad> i prefer to call them lacktoids
<emad> in that they lack wit
<emad> ...
<Dumont> [welcome datacomp]
<emad> don't worry... i'll handle this
*** mode/#tron [+o emad] by ChanServ
*** emad was kicked from #tron by emad [no. don't do that.]
%
A man, a plan, a canoe, pasta, heros, rajahs, a coloratura, maps,
snipe, percale, macaroni, a gag, a banana bag, a tan, a tag, a
banana bag again (or a camel), a crepe, pins, Spam, a rut, a Rolo,
cash, a jar, sore hats, a peon, a canal--Panama!
-- Guy L. Steele, Jr.
%
<Octal> Really, I had expected burning man to break down into smaller regional festivals by now.
<Octal> apparently I suck at the future.
<sneakums> Octal: it's a shared experience, maaaaaaaan, a zeitgeist
<Octal> also, damn expensive and run by a restrictive organization.
<Octal> They even limit what days you can burn the man on.
%
* Screwtape clings to his vi reference mug.
<teferi> do you have to push a button on it to go from tea to coffee mode?
%
<sneakums> man, i bet these dorks with x-no-archive set never write
anything interesting anyway
<SpaceHobo> you should make a point of replying with full quotation to
each and every one
%
The Schleswig-Holstein question is so complicated, only three men in
Europe have ever understood it. One was Prince Albert, who is dead.
The second was a German professor who became mad. I am the third and
I have forgotten all about it.
-- Lord Palmerston
%
<Octal> So, is everybody looking forward to Volkswagen announcing
their new City Expert next week?
<Screwtape> Is that for DS or Xbox 360?
%
<Octal> If you can find scientists to back intelligent design I'm sure you can
find at least one priest who thinks hell no longer exists.
%
If you are getting straight As in college, then you chose the wrong one.
%
<sneakums> Dumont: fo0bar is also an unbewiiver
<Dumont> okay, sneakums.
<fo0bar> my wii doesn't excrete kittens :(
<Screwtape> fo0bar: Have you had it checked by a vetewiinarian?
%
There is just no way that 2004's reelection could have taken place -- not to
mention extraordinary renditions, legalized torture, FISA-flouting, or the
passage of the Military Commissions Act -- if we had been paying attention
and handling information in a competent grown-up way.
-- David Foster Wallace
%
<xkcd> I'm gonna go start a webcomic
<Octal> again?
%
<Octal> Remember: You're not getting heavier, the reference kilogram is just
getting lighter.
<neale> actually the kilogram is a unit of mass, not force
<Octal> and the pound is based off the kilogram now
<Screwtape> Except for the pound sterling.
<Screwtape> And the dog pound.
<neale> don't forget pound cake
<xkcd> and the yellow cake
<xkcd> yellow journalism
<xkcd> gonzo journalism
<Dumont> the users said that gonzo journalism is not for the WEAK OF SPIRIT
<xkcd> gonzo beans
<xkcd> kidney beans
<Dumont> kidney beans are best for cabling, while garbanzo works best for a
transistor poultice
<xkcd> kidney stones
<xkcd> one stone
<Dumont> one stone is 14 pounds.
<xkcd> and the circle is complete
%
<megan_of_wutai> my perpetual motion machine will show those
thermodynamics snobs!
%
*** Octal is now known as nieman
<nieman> nemo: Take THAT!
<nemo> nieman: taken
%
<fuzzie> what i need is a nice 500gb seagate to stick somewhere
<bz2> I'll tell you where to stick it.
<fuzzie> in ur server
<bz2> Well, yes.
%
<SpaceHobo> wait
<SpaceHobo> hangon
<SpaceHobo> let's be clear
<SpaceHobo> is he in the krautsphere, or is he on the krautscape?
<SpaceHobo> they're different things
%
<sneakums> and that's enough of confusingly-named musical instruments for now
<xkcd> sneakums: but I was just getting the anal viola warmed up!
<sneakums> i do like a bit of anal violation
%
<philb> I can't take "Man kills himself in Woolworths" seriously
<philb> as a headline
%
<Octal> Have you ever played in traffic? It's awesome.
%
<spork> maybe we should start equating republicans to bedwetters
<spork> in the same way democrats are spineless
<Octal> Well, having a spine has been known to put extra pressure on the bladder
<Octal> it's simple anatomy
%
The moment you hear somebody say something's over, it usually means
that something massive is about to happen.
-- Douglas Coupland
%
<sneakums> screen (4.0.3-5) unstable; urgency=low
<sneakums> * Build with 256-color support. Closes: #348099.
<Screwtape> Oh boy!
<SpaceHobo> ...
<fuzzie> ooh
<bz2> ooooh
%
<Octal> I don't see why everybody calls this Excel bug critical. It only
happens when the result should be 65535, and there are an infinite
number of numbers, so the odds of this happening is one in
infinity, which is practically 0.
%
Of course, the reason you heard it there first is that it wasn't true.
-- John Gruber
%
<emad> i just saw a cat jump in a trash can
<emad> it made me smile
<emad> would you like to see a cat jump into a trash can?
<emad> http://gigglesugar.com/655907 <-- a cat jumping into a trash can.
<emad> the video linked above is that of a cat jumping into a trash can
<emad> oh, i should note: SPOILER ALERT
%
<sneakums> all i wanna do is
<Dumont> *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* *BLAM* and a *KA-CHING* and take your money
%
The saddest part about the story of Real Networks isn't the
malicious, downright evil people in charge of it. It isn't the
fact that Real Networks intentionally spit in each and every one
of their users' faces. No, the saddest part of the story, the
part which really tears you up, is the fact that Real Networks
didn't die an agonizing death when the industry bubble burst.
-- Tomas Jogin
http://jogin.com/weblog/archives/2004/03/07/real_proof
%
It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary
depends upon his not understanding it.
-- Upton Sinclair
%
<Screwtape> > The more you get out of what you do, the more human beings will
be happy, and find that experience fun. So if you have a
two-year-old child standing near a light switch, they will turn it
on and off, on and off, on and off, until told to stop. [Itagaki
gets up and demonstrates.]
<fondue> with an unwilling female employee, presumably
<Screwtape> I don't think he attempted to produce a two-year-old child on the
spot.
<Screwtape> That would have made for an uncomfortably long pause in the
interview.
%
<emad> it really should be drink the flavoraid
<emad> since that's what the jim jones people actually drank
<emad> problem is so many people have drank the "drink the koolaid" flavoraid
<emad> i'm fighting a losing battle
%
The scientist does not study nature because it is useful; he studies it
because he delights in it, and he delights in it because it is beautiful.
If nature were not beautiful, it would not be worth knowing, and if nature
were not worth knowing, life would not be worth living.
-- Henri Poincaré
%
The right to free speech does not imply the right to be taken seriously.
-- Hubert Humphrey
%
<emad> also i have another one about how to lose weight
<emad> it is called "stop putting food in your mouth"
<mrd> Ask your doctor if getting off your ass is right for you.
%
<squinky> gads, I hate when foreshadowing is too thinly veiled
<Screwtape> squinky: But not as much as you will about ten minutes from now.
%
<SpaceHobo> like, I think your doctor could roll his eyes at your
festering abscess and chastize you for trying to sterilize
it with a 40 of olde english, but you'd get a knowing nod
and a "good effort" for using mouthwash
<SpaceHobo> whatever you do, it will sting like the devil's teeth
<penryu> which is why I'm picking up isopropyl and hydrogen peroxide
later this evening.
<SpaceHobo> what sort of wound is this again?
<SpaceHobo> chupacabra bite?
<penryu> yes
<SpaceHobo> you'll need to pull the stinger out with a silver blade
<penryu> fuck.
<SpaceHobo> and then soak it in moist peat for an hour
* penryu melts down his fillings for silver
<SpaceHobo> or you can just go into any darkroom and use silver nitrate on it
%
<squinky> xkcd: you should play this game we're playing
<xkcd> <squinky> it's called SHUT UP
%
<Screwtape> The major addition to Zingband is a jester class whose sole
offensive capability is his barbed wit.
%
<nornagon> Your little dog picks up a rat corpse.
<nornagon> (no, really)
<Screwtape> Oh yeah? Well, YOUR little dog steals blessed weapons from stores!
<nornagon> i was just hanging out the washing and i heard 'scree scree
*scuffle*' and i turned around and our mini foxy was
battling some kind of rodent
%
I was so darned sorry for poor old Corky that I hadn't the heart to
touch my breakfast. I told Jeeves to drink it himself.
-- P.G. Wodehouse, "My Man Jeeves"
%
<Screwtape> I'm noticing a trend in git that I previously noticed with Python:
every release from before I first learned it is filled with
archaisms and horror, every version released after I got familiar
with it is filled with frivolity and doo-dads.
<Screwtape> I think I shall have to find a lawn, and a cane to keep kids off it.
%
<shoofle> I think I might start the article "list of composite numbers"
<shoofle> warning: this list may be incomplete
%
<emad> tapeworms were used in the 80s to store data
<emad> you'd have to play them using your walkmantis
%
<bz2> Stop saying truck, you're not an American.
<megan_of_wutai> bz2: a truck is a semitrailer
<megan_of_wutai> a van is a smaller one
<megan_of_wutai> we call them trucks
<megan_of_wutai> here
<megan_of_wutai> always have
<bz2> Whatever happened to lorry?
<megan_of_wutai> oh
<megan_of_wutai> lorry
<megan_of_wutai> fuck
%
<Octal> hey protip, I forgot to ask, did my guitar hero pro tip help you out?
<protip> yeah, i'm now on the tip of becoming a pro
%
Programmers always seem to think the language they're currently
using provides exactly the right amount of abstraction for the task
at hand, with anything less dynamic being considered barbaric, and
anything more dynamic seen as crazy and unsafe.
-- John Siracusa
%
* squinky puts an ascii banana in the motd on every host
<squinky> ^-- that is what cfengine is for
%
<fo0bar> gah, I did it again
<fo0bar> note to self: my name is not Ryan Finnix
%
<squinky> I am now baking a cake
<squinky> kind of
<squinky> I made up a weird hybrid between an angel food cake and cornbread
<Octal> are you saying that cornbread is not the food of angels?
<squinky> I'm saying it is now.
%
<Screwtape> Oh boy, oh boy! Beautiful rain-storm!
<Screwtape> I... I must have tea!
%
<nobody> you know what would be awesome?
<SpaceHobo> nobody: a chainsaw made of NINJAS?
%
Error is the central feature of human existence.
-- Errol Morris
%
<Screwtape> Wolsisnc, rlaie-.
<Screwtape> Alternately, "Morning, crazies."
<nornagon> itym 'alternatively'
<Screwtape> No, I really am going to switch from one to the other every day.
%
<fo0bar> crap, I keep forgetting that my laptop is literally the ONLY
core 2 duo without vmx
<emad> VMX
<emad> whatchyall coders waaaaaaant
<emad> V! M! X!
<fo0bar> ...
<Dumont> [Nothing happens.]
<emad> code! or! die!
%
<emad> well, read a book then burn it
<emad> so no one else can steal the precious knowledge from you
<emad> that will solve both your cravings
<emad> the need to read
<emad> the desire for fire
<emad> clinically described as the yearn to burn and learn
%
<xkcd> it wouldn't do to lose my trousers in front of ubuntu
%
<maLLee> My birthday is REALLY soon.
<Gelsamel> When?
<sneakums> five... four... three...
<Gelsamel> Fuck you sneakums
<sneakums> Been said.
%
<squinky> so I was sitting in the lab at work
<squinky> two different people walked up to me and asked me work
related questions
<squinky> and I kept telling them I was busy trolling irc and ask me later
<squinky> in both cases, they said okay and left without question
%
<xkcd> argh
<xkcd> when I run certain programs
<xkcd> they reset the style in gnome-terminal
<xkcd> all the fonts have changed
<emad> xkcd: if you are having style problems, i have an easy remedy
<emad> PUT YA' STUNNA SHADES ON
<emad> PUT YA' STUNNA SHADES ON
<emad> PUT YA' STUNNA SHADES ON
<emad> PUT YA' STUNNA SHADES ON
<emad> PUT YA' STUNNA SHADES ON
<emad> so, give that a try
<emad> i predict you will find the results pleasing
%
<xkcd> pass the tanning butter
<Dumont> here comes the stingray
<xkcd> waaa oo waaaa
<Dumont> There goes a manta-ray
<xkcd> ee eee eee eee
<Dumont> In walked a jelly fish
<xkcd> gggggrrrrrrrr
<Dumont> There goes a dogfish
<xkcd> mrrrrowwwwww
<Dumont> Chased by a catfish
<xkcd> naaaaaaaaaaaa
<Dumont> In flew a sea robin
<xkcd> aaaaa aa aa a
<Dumont> Watch out for that piranha
<xkcd> yichyichyichyichyichyich
<Dumont> There goes a narwhale
<xkcd> eeeeoooeeeeooooo
<Dumont> HERE COMES A BIKINI WHALE!
<sneakums> so that's why nasa fired you.
%
<jp> kingKonqueror: your tribe: ?friends... ?considered ubunteros
<jp> ... ubu got so big, our managers opened ubu2
<kingKonqueror> they were just some random people, all at approximately the
same level - i actually just left
<jp> honk if you love linux; join if you love ubuntu
<kingKonqueror> honk honk...
<Dumont> Excuse me sir, are my balls hanging out of my shorts?
<kingKonqueror> oh god, how did *that* get in the database?
%
<Zen> I just wanted to ask an unresearched question, in case there was
any doubt I was an impostor.
%
<Octal> Hmm... the specs for this Eee PC are rather vague
<Octal> Processor: Intel Mobile CPU
<Octal> Chipset: Intel Mobile Chipset
<Octal> Of course, the title for that section of the table is "Intel
CPU & Chipset"
%
<emad> i'm in the crawl space of your heart
%
<jotun> drwiii: what's SMG like?
<drwiii> it's the best game ever made
<philb> ambiguous, what does drwiii really mean?
%
...and your point is? are you confused as to why nobody cares?
there's two reasons:
1. microsoft
2. webmasters
%
<emad> when you live like a trucker
<emad> you die like a trucker
%
<clavicle> Tuomo Valkonen, Jörg Schilling and Hans Reiser walk into a bar
%
<Octal> This Scientific American article was interesting right up to the point
where they made up a new name for an XOR gate
<Octal> They called it a "controlled NOT".
%
<Zen> So from what I can tell we've just got a case of a young person
being young on the internet?
%
<sneakums> just you and the debugger, alone on breakpoint mountain
<jotun> come on in here, debugger, 'fore you freeze
%
<khmer> lorem ipsum dolor si amet, penis penis penis penis
%
<superfriend> FEAR UP HARSH
<superfriend> i just like the position of that phrase next to "superfriend"
%
<sneakums> the wheel has tuuuuuuuuurned
<sneakums> one full circle
<jotun> that's only 3 degrees in cyberspace
%
<pedro> do you think it would be faster to concatenate two strings and print
them, or execute two print statements in succession with perl?
<Octal> I think you should alternate between the two solutions, just to
demonstrate that there's more than one way to do it.
%
Low-level optimization is generally the last resort of someone who
screwed up the design.
-- Jeff Darcy
%
<emad> ok so since xkcd is coming over tomorrow
<emad> and on a totally separate note
<emad> i need a large butterfly jar
<emad> one big enough to fit a butterfly of 6 feet or so
%
<Octal> cheeseburgers are always better than hamburgers
<Octal> Ever been to Cheeseburg? It's awesome.
%
<atob> clavicle: what are your views on Scientific Progress?
<clavicle> atob: it gets in the way of my faith.
%
We have a technical term for any business plan that
relies on making life difficult for customers and easy
for non-customers: we call it "circling the drain".
-- Charlie Stross
%
The one religious belief that now makes you truly unemployable in
physics departments in the US is Einstein's belief in the existence of
a deep mathematical and geometrical structure to physical reality.
-- Peter Woit
%
<Zen> Man, don't these people realize that teen pregnancy can be used as an
incentive to help kids learn math?
%
<xkcd> so a guy in the back asked a python question during the talk
<xkcd> afterward, someone told me
<xkcd> "so you know that was Guido van Rossum, right?"
<megan_of_wutai> what was the question?
<xkcd> "why can't I fly?"
%
<bz2> ACHTENTACHTIG PRACHTIGE GRACHTEN
<sneakums> wossat then
<fuzzie> 88 beautiful [city] canals.
<teferi> how do you pronounce it?
<bz2> With great difficulty.
%
<emad> i'm not sure what happens when you assume, but i can come to
some unresearched conclusions
%
<Octal> What up, peeps
<Octal> and by peeps, I mean people
%
<emad> i felt like asking them for a copy of their french constitution
<emad> and then be all "i don't get a chance to read periodicals much!"
%
My standard for verisimilitude is simple and I came to it when I
started to write prose narrative: fuck the average reader. I was
always told to write for the average reader in my newspaper life. The
average reader, as they meant it, was some suburban white subscriber
with two-point-whatever kids and three-point-whatever cars and a dog
and a cat and lawn furniture. He knows nothing and he needs
everything explained to him right away, so that exposition becomes
this incredible, story-killing burden. Fuck him. Fuck him to hell.
-- David Simon
%
<Octal> In other news, I was re-heating some ham and it exploded a little bit.
<Screwtape> Exploding ham? In *my* microwave?
<Octal> No, in mine.
%
<emad> xkcd: were you in 'nam ?
<emad> over the summer
<xkcd> emad: still got the shrapnel
<xkcd> in my carry-on bag
%
<emad> TRAAAINS
<emad> said the zombie conductor
%
<sneakums> karma for ha
<Dumont> ha has karma of -50
<sneakums> karma for ha ha
<Dumont> ha ha has karma of -7
<sneakums> karma for ha ha ha
<Dumont> ha ha ha has karma of -13
<sneakums> karma for ha ha ha ha
<Dumont> ha ha ha ha has karma of -2
<sneakums> karma for ha ha ha ha ha
<Dumont> ha ha ha ha ha has karma of -1
<sneakums> karma for ha ha ha ha ha ha
<Dumont> ha ha ha ha ha ha has karma of -2
<sneakums> karma for ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
<Dumont> ha ha ha ha ha ha ha has karma of -1
<sneakums> karma for ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
<Dumont> ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha has karma of -1
<sneakums> karma for ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
<Dumont> ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha has neutral karma
%
<teferi> well, this is pretty awful tea
<sneakums> bogus
<teferi> but what else can you do? /not/ drink tea?
<sneakums> unthinkable
<SpaceHobo> How does that even work?
%
<Octal> I am very disappointed in MauvePornoRod for ignoring best
practices and using a histogram in place of a dong chart.
%
> Linux is about choice.
If I could only have one thing this year, it would be to eliminate that
meme from the collective consciousness. It is a disease. It strangles
the mind and ensures you can never change anything ever because someone
somewhere has OCD'd their environment exactly how they like it and how
dare you change it on them you're so mean and next time I have friends
over for Buffy night you're not invited mom he's sitting on my side again.
-- Adam Jackson
%
<philb> it's funny reading the anonymised log
<philb> and trying to work out who is talking
<Rattus> the mean bits are always sneakums
<Rattus> <sneakums> the stupid bits are always Rattus
%
FADE IN
EXT. FIELD DAY
COW is standing in the field.
NARRATOR
The cow is sad.
(Pretending to be a mournful cow.)
Mooooooo.
-- Sean Kermes
%
INT. MY MANSION - DUSK
A study in subdued luxury. A tall, handsome figure enters -- it's ME.
ME
I have ninety minutes and lots of unpopular
opinions, so let's get started.
-- Jonathan Blum
%
SNOOP
Here, let's pray.
Here we lay a couple of New York boys who
came too far south for their own fuckin' good.
Fuckin' Yankee Pride that now, you fuckin' bitches.
-- The Wire, "Corner Boys" (S4E08)
%
CARVER
This is one of those enabling relationships.
HERC
Enable me, Carv.
-- The Wire, "Unto Others", (S4E07)
%
<Octal> Man, I hope that "honest to blog" doesn't become a common phrase.
<sneakums> Do you hope to blog that it doesn't?
<Octal> fuck you
%
*** xkcd is now known as Sharkspeare
<Sharkspeare> A boat? What's in a boat? A bigger boat with any other
folks would taste as sweet.
%
<emad> what should i feed on?
<emad> microwave burrito?
<sneakums> the flesh of thine enemy
<emad> so we're agreed
%
<fo0bar> wow, I simply can't get over how adequate iwl3945 is!
<sneakums> you mean it's barely functional?
<fo0bar> IT'S SUFFICIENT!!!!!!!1
%
<emad> what doesn't go with brown?
<emad> like, can i wear blue with brown?
<Octal> emad: You're doing the joke all wrong. The jacket is supposed to
be red, so that your crew can't see any blood if you get hit and
start bleeding. It's the pants that are supposed to be brown.
%
<fo0bar> oh, and I've talked on the phone with linux torvalds
<squinky> actually that was me
<squinky> i was doing my french accent
<squinky> "oo la la! ees thee rayon feenooks there? thees ees
linnucks torfowleds!! HONH HONH HONH"
%
<Screwtape> The final boss battle in Phantom Hourglass was pretty easy until
it suddenly turned into Newton MessagePad 100: The Videogame.
%
<sneakums> > This site uses AJAX to generate page content. You need to enable
Javascript in your browser and reload the page in order to see it.
<sneakums> good. fucking. grief.
<emad> we see here the charlie brownus vulgaris
<emad> rarely found in the wild, it can be identified by its call
<emad> 22:45 <@sneakums> good. fucking. grief.
<emad> also note the tell tale shirt with a \/\/\/\ on it
<emad> we must approach it with caution as it has been known to kick wildly
into the air, even when there is not a football present
* emad pokes sneakums
<emad> it may be slumbering or simply pretending to as a defense mechanism
%
<jotun> i wish people wouldn't use words like 'douchebag'
<jotun> we have tens or hundreds of names that have stood the test of time. do
we really want something like 'douchebag' in our kids' dictionaries?
<sneakums> especially since the term is "duckbag"
<jotun> great, now everytime i hear 'douchebag,' i'm going to think of that
looney tunes episode where daffy duck is a carpetbagger
%
Whenever obfuscated code was posted on RedHanded, you could guarantee a
reaction like that of dustin in the comments: "5 lines? With Error
checking?" Otherwise known as: Humpfh, good sirs, this code is not
maintainable! And which also rears its head as: This is exactly what I
hate about Ruby! This code makes me want to shoot myself! Host rejects
graft! Brain rejects brain poisons! The Serious Skeleton Has Emerged
From His Crypt Of Contemplation And He Has No Funny Bones For You!
-- whytheluckystiff
%
Yes, popping a paper bag in the mall makes a very loud
noise. Yes, you can hear that shit echoing all through
the place. Yes, rent-a-cops are all dicks.
-- Patrick Hughes
%
<Clockworkmonk> I wonder if I could make a mask that would display an
emoticon approprate to my mood?
<vajedu> like a mood ring, but weirder?
<Clockworkmonk> I think LEDs would be involved
<Shrdlu> You will find, I suspect, that you are already so equipped!
<Shrdlu> It is an entirely organic technology we like to call a "face".
%
<sneakums> > This video is no longer available due to a copyright
claim by NBC Universal
<sneakums> bah
<sneakums> screw you, NBC!
<Zen> If they didn't want it on YouTube, they shouldn't have made it suck.
%
<clavicle> so, now that Ron Paul is the Republican nominahahaahaa
<kenard> screw you, ron paul had 3 delegates in west virginia
<kenard> i guess the media forgot to tell you that!
%
Of course, this being XKB, there's a lot of superfluous crap
that turns out to be unused, and the result makes no sense. \o/
-- Daniel Stone
%
<sneakums> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Irish_Rebellion
<megan_of_wutai> expected disambiguation page, was not disappointed
%
It is one of history's great ironies that at the very moment when the
United States had a monopoly of nuclear weapons, possessed most of the
world's gold, produced half the world's goods on its own territory, and
laid down the rules for allies and adversaries alike, it was afraid.
-- Richard Barnet
%
TOM FRENCH
You're some bollocks, do you know that?
FRANK
I know everything.
-- I Went Down (1997)
%
(Following a shootout.)
BUNNY
I didn't know I was the type.
GIT
Wha'?
BUNNY
I'm after shittin' me pants.
-- I Went Down (1997)
%
<emad> fo0bar: what ever happened to that truck full of cigarettes
<fo0bar> emad: I smoked it
<fo0bar> after I dumped the cigarettes out of it, of course
%
<emad> welcome to your face
<emad> have you met?
%
People get bored listening to a perfectly good but rather
long explanation of why there is no perfect merge algorithm
and so they stop listening. Since they don't learn there
can't be a perfect merge algorithm, they then paradoxically
*waste* time BSing about their design for one. It's a bit
like the "perpetual motion machine" industry.
-- Tom Lord
%
A lot of the kernel architecture is all about making it
really hard to do stupid things by mistake.
-- Linus Torvalds
%
<squinky> I get roughly two megabits on my cable
<emad> did someone say MEGAMAN
<emad> oh i did
%
<xkcd> I probably have The Fatal.
<xkcd> by which I mean some kind of sick
<xkcd> but I always assume everything is fatal
<xkcd> just to be on the safe side
<xkcd> ... so to speak
%
I'm talking, as you know if you're reading two words ahead, about 2006.
-- Marc Hogan
%
<fuzzie> bz2's flooded the bathroom.
<fuzzie> it's my fault, of course.
<fuzzie> "you are a causal factor, as they call it at the rail accident
investigation branch"
%
Leibniz has much to say on the subject of /perceptions/ which I have
but little understood until recently. And you may love Leibniz or
not. But consider: Newton has thought things that no man before has
ever thought. A great accomplishment, to be sure. Perhaps the
greatest achievement any human mind has ever made. Very well--what
does that say of Newton, and of us? Why, that his mind is framed in
such a way that it can out-think anyone else's. So, all hail Isaac
Newton! Let us give him his due, and glorify and worship whatever
generative force can frame such a mind. Now, consider Hooke. Hooke
has perceived things that no man before has ever perceived. What does
that say of Hooke, and of us? That Hooke was framed in some special
way? No, for just look at you, Robert--by your leave, you are
stooped, asthmatic, fitful, beset by aches and ills, your eyes and
ears are no better than those of men who've not perceived a thousandth
part of what you have. Newton makes his discoveries in geometrickal
realms where our minds cannot go, he strolls in a walled garden filled
with wonders, to which he has the only key. But you, Hooke, are
cheek-by-jowl with all of humanity in the streets of London. /Anyone/
can look at the things you have looked at. But in those things /you/
see what no-one else has. You are the millionth human to look at a
spark, a flea, a raindrop, the moon, and the first to see it. For
anyone to say that this is less remarkable than what Newton has done,
is to understand things in but a hollow and jejune way, 'tis like
going to a Shakespeare play and remembering only the sword-fights.
-- Daniel Waterhouse, in
Neal Stephenson's "Quicksilver"
%
* teferi fiddles with abstraction-y stuff
<nornagon> abstractor.
<teferi> yup.
<nornagon> public static TeferiAbstractorFactoryFactory
<teferi> please
<teferi> public static interface
%
Listen to me. I did not wish to be summoned by your Princess.
Summoned, I did not wish to come. But having been summoned, and
having come, I mean to give a good account of myself. That's how
I was taught by my father, and by the men of his age who slew
Kings and swept away not merely Governments but whole Systems of
Thought, like Khans of the Mind. I would have my son in Boston
know of my doings, and be proud of them, and carry my ways forward
to another generation on another continent. Any opponent who does
not know this about me, stands at a grave disadvantage; a
disadvantage I am not above profiting from.
-- Daniel Waterhouse, in
Neal Stephenson's "The System Of The World"
%
I would fainer dwell in a meaner Liberty with fewer
delusions than roam about a great one while being used by
the lies and deceptions of the Party in power.
-- Dappa, in
Neal Stephenson's "The System Of The World"
%
Clever stratagems are quite beyond my powers, but if it is rank
foolishness you require, I have no end of it.
-- Jack Shaftoe
%
This is our own age of exploration, into that unmapped country
waiting beyond the frontiers and seas of Time. We make our
journeys out there in the low light of the future, and return to
the bourgeois day and its mass delusion of safety, to report on
what we've seen. What are any of these "utopian dreams" of ours
but defective forms of time-travel?
-- Yashmeen Halfcourt
%
<spork> this bread needs buttering
<spork> but i can't do that without a warrant
<spork> damn liberals
<spork> if fbi agents could have buttered their bread in the summer of
2001, they'd have stayed a few minutes longer eating their bread
and would have overheard two saudi men discussing a sinister plot
<spork> instead they left the bread on the table, and the two men were
able to buy another 100 million dollars worth of bank of america
<spork> never forget :<
%
BARRIS
Of course I'm kidding! Only a psychotic
would do that... leave the front door of the
house unlocked with a note on the door?
ARCTOR
So what'd you write on the note, Jim?
BARRIS
I wrote, "Come on in, the door's unlocked."
-- A Scanner Darkly (2006)
%
<x> i heard most xbox developers screamed "woohoo" and moved to the central
project prioritization committee. the ppc will then create steering and
core teams to implement design changes to fix things; i'm just wondering
who i need to be my experience having 30,000 files in your filthy heart.
%
Take a step or two forward, lads. It will be easier that way.
-- Erskine Childers, to the firing squad about to execute him
%
"We're not talking conscious decision, here?" Blackwell kneaded what
was left of his right ear.
"No," Laney said, "I don't know what I thought I was doing."
"You were trying to save her. The girl."
"It felt like something snappped. A rubber band. It felt
like gravity."
"That's what it feels like," Blackwell said, "when you decide."
-- William Gibson, "Idoru"
%
<X11R5> hooray for static ips.
<X11R5> so you've stopped setting your wife on fire.
<X11R5> the intent is to ignore stories about mistakenly tased partners.
%
<squinky> man we need a "your" module
<squinky> for dumont
<Dumont> for meeeeeeeee
%
<plushemad> GRET
<plushemad> THE SHIFT KEY IS BROKEN
<plushemad> THE KEY TO THE LEFT OF THE S KEY IS BROKEN TOO
<plushemad> FUNCTION IS BUSTED TOO
<Octal> You mean the key?
<plushemad> :<
%
Can you please point me in the direction of the BSD kernel
lists so that I can inject useless snarky flaimbait anytime
someone attempts a little process improvement. I don't do
any BSD kernel development, but I like to stir things up.
-- Russ Dill, in response to David Newall's
contributions to a linux-kernel thread
%
The whole Java circus has harmed Free Software far more than it
ever inconvenienced Sun's rivals Microsoft, IBM, and HP.
Everybody who joined that circus helped them and Sun at the
expense of Free Software. The only saving grace is that it drew
off the worst programmers (along with a few good ones) into
dead-end projects where they would do little lasting damage.
-- Nathan C. Myers
%
The worm drives helically through the wood
And does not know the dust left in the bore
Once made the table integral and good;
And suddenly the crystal hits the floor.
Electrons find their paths in subtle ways,
A massless eddy in a trail of smoke;
The names of lovers, light of other days --
Perhaps you will not miss them. That's the joke.
The universe winds down. That's how it's made.
But memory is everything to lose;
Although some of the colors have to fade,
Do not believe you'll get the chance to choose.
Regret, by definition, comes too late;
Say what you mean. Bear witness. Iterate.
-- John M. Ford
%
<Octal> My emergency kit is a handgun, which I intend to use to steal
someone else's emergency kit.
<Octal> I hope everyone else doesn't get the same idea.
%
In essence, it says that someone will, at some point, perform some
number of badly-defined deeds -- thus restoring the missing part of
our three-part world, and fixing an unknown number of problems.
-- The Tree Keeper explains the prophecy
%
<fo0bar> > Reno police were searching this afternoon for a man who
said his cats had told him to kill people.
<sneakums> Sounds to me like the cats are the real culprits here.
<Octal> Oh good, you got away.
%
THE BRIDGE
In a cloud bones of steel.
-- Charles Reznikoff
%
<clavicle> this article on japanese toilets is amazingly detailed.
%
We are monkeys with money and guns.
-- Tom Waits
%
Beautiful redheads who are friends of beautiful redheads who love
me are 71% more likely to fall for my charms.
-- Malcolm Gladwell
%
1. Never hate, only ever destroy.
2. Forgive *everything*.
-- Giles Bowkett
%
<Octal> well, how the hell would you convert an e-mail into text?
<Octal> it's impossible!
%
<philb> ARGH
<philb> Storms leave county under water
<philb> Torrential storms have led to flooding across half of Somerset.
<philb> so, the BBC lies in its headline, contradicts in the strapline
and then admits the lie in the article itself
<philb> which was "it rained a bit in some parts of Somerset"
<Rattus> you'd best hop a lorry, take the lift to the top floor, and correct
those wankers
%
<squinky> hey so how come no one told me that ruby has so many things
wrong with it?
<squinky> everyone's all 'ooh yay ruby'
<squinky> and it turns out it's interpreted much in the way that tcl
or dos batch files are
<squinky> you bunch of trolls
%
<sneakums> i hear ruby doesn't have integers
<psykoyiko> sneakums: it does, they just don't scale
<psykoyiko> despite being scalars!
<psykoyiko> THUNDERZING
%
Townes Van Zandt is the best songwriter in the whole world and I'll
stand on Bob Dylan's coffee table in my cowboy boots and say that.
-- Steve Earle
I've met Bob Dylan and his bodyguards, and I don't think Steve could
get anywhere near his coffee table.
-- Townes Van Zandt
%
If I am gone and with no trace
I will be in my minor place
%
<SpaceHobo> the term "british" and "britain" are obnoxiously shifty
<shoofle> you're thinking of bRiTiSh
%
They're called design patterns, not design templates.
Designing to them is bad; seeing them emerge is good.
-- Giles Bowkett
%
I don't know how anyone with a sufficiently developed
consciousness could claim to "love life". The life you love
depends on the slavery of dozens of people less fortunate
than yourself, you fucking airhead, and the policies you
support cause the death and misery of thousands of people
every year. It's only your extreme shallowness and
ignorance that lets you say such a thing: if you had a note
of awareness or dignity in your head, you'd spend every
waking moment in a deep depression.
-- Stephen Bond
%
<fo0bar> children are our future
<fo0bar> and like all futures, they should be traded on an open market
%
The half-life of Not Getting The Point is forever.
-- Loudon Wainwright
%
<emad> hey guys
<emad> mozilla is sponsoring a firefox download day
<emad> you can get ff 3.0 for free
%
<clavicle> "you people"?
<clavicle> I'm bobbing my head side-to-side so hard right now.
%
And there is another feeling that is a great consolation in poverty.
I believe everyone who has been hard up has experienced it. It is a
feeling of relief, almost of pleasure, at knowing yourself at last
genuinely down and out. You have talked so often of going to the
dogs---and well, here are the dogs, and you have reached them, and
you can stand it. It takes off a lot of anxiety.
-- George Orwell
%
<Octal> Total Fires: 1,090
<Octal> Acres: 165,091
<Octal> Contained Fires: 241
<Octal> SO CLOSE
<Octal> just contain one more, fellas!
%
<SpaceHobo> with my semantic physique Jah know me well built
%
<clavicle> hella is a hella cool word
<clavicle> and every time I use it people ignore everything else to focus on it
%
This is why people o.d. on pills
and jump from the Golden Gate Bridge.
Anything to feel weightless again.
-- The Handsome Family
%
While sitting one day in a Caltech seminar room waiting for a talk to
begin, [Michael] Cohen found himself wondering what happens to a
physicist as he ages. He turned to Feynman, who was next to him, and
asked his mentor, "How will I know when physics passes me by?"
Feynman simply smiled. It was a beautful spring day and the windows
were open, a gentle breeze blowing outside. Cohen, who had been
working late the night before, dozed off. He next felt a nudge in the
ribs. Waking with a start, he heard Feynman say to him, while
pointing to the open window, "There it goes, Mike. Kiss it good-bye."
-- Gino Segrè, "Faust in Copenhagen"
%
If the corporation says "I'm not going to be evil," and the government
says "oh yes you are," it's pretty much the end of the conversation.
-- Giles Bowkett
%
<emad> it ain't easy being a cool dude
<clavicle> emad: so you got hired by pitchfork? nice!
%
<teferi> threads are evil anyway :(
<sneakums> they sure are.
<sneakums> shared-nothing processes and messaging, that's the ticket!
<teferi> i can't tell if you're mocking me or not
<sneakums> i am serious.
<teferi> well, now i can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not
%
<megan_of_wutai> wfm
<megan_of_wutai> (it might not, I haven't tried)
%
<Screwtape> I want to see a pigeon-hole problem that involves putting
holes in actual pigeons.
%
<sneakums> You laugh now, but in ten years even your cellphone will
run OpenSolaris!
<fuzzie> Well, that's certainly some new nightmare material.
%
I am not a supporter of Linux.
-- Richard M. Stallman
%
<fo0bar> man, I could make a fortune by selling laptops that are pre-filled
with sensitive personal data to big companies
<fo0bar> then they wouldn't have to go through the trouble of gathering
personal data before losing the laptop!
%
<blorpy> man, this identi.ca is just irc but not
<clavicle> blorpy: you can troll people from everywhere, it's awesome
%
<teferi> (also: fuck techcrunch so hard)
<clavicle> hoho, look who's got a sandy valleywag
%
<SpaceHobo> crap, now I've got to take my collection of lead weights
out of their protective stockings!
%
<Octal> Dumont: elegant gothic lolita is <reply>All three words are false!
<Dumont> OK, Octal.
<Octal> I sure hope that factoid never has to be used.
%
<fo0bar> So who should I root for? America, or one of those other
countries I learned about at the food court?
<Zen> Well, all the other teams train in America anyway.
<Octal> Cantankerous codger unit!
%
<fuzzie> the debian java game really isn't so hard. step one: install openjdk.
step two: remove everything else. step three: shoot yourself.
%
<Octal> Good news everybody! I am now in posession of a trayless SATA rack!
<Octal> It has shock absorbers!
<Screwtape> Octal: Disk, or disk-not. There is no tray.
<Octal> Shut up.
%
<Zen> It's not shit because it inconsistently applied a lame expository gimmick
<Zen> It's shit because of every shitty thing it fucking did that was shitty
<megan_of_wutai> remarkably shitty
<Zen> SO shitty.
<Zen> I hate people who don't hate it.
%
<fo0bar> <Lehrer> umm, could ONE of you answer my question?
<teferi> i dunno, obama touched on it
<baconaut> Could you show me on this doll, where Obama touched on it?
%
<megan_of_wutai> my children will be severely beaten if they
call a directory a folder
%
<Octal> Before you vote for McCain, just remember: Maverick got Goose killed.
%
Everything written with vitality expresses that vitality;
there are no dull subjects, only dull minds.
-- Raymond Chandler
%
<sneakums> emad: what did we say that made you think that?
<emad> it is not what you said, but how i chose to misread it
<emad> apology accepted
%
I was gonna release hardware docs, but then I got high
Linux woulda worked right outa the box, but then I got high
Now everyone's buying Intel, and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high, because I got high.
-- Don Marti
%
<Octal> It seems to me that the problem with eating your own dog food is that
you are eating dog food.
%
Perhaps the only thing that elevates software designers
above the Keystone Kops is that the comedy of errors grows
ever more sophisticated with time and experience.
-- Larry Leinweber
%
I've also got this new G45 box here; perhaps it's time to enter the 21st
century and run it in native 64-bit mode. It's scary though; I've been
writing window systems for 32-bit machines for thirty years now.
-- Keith Packard
%
It is now clear that, at least as far as domestic policy is concerned,
the administration views terrorism as another useful crisis.
-- Paul Krugman, New York Times
November 11, 2001
%
<teferi> j2me is a failure
<SpaceHobo> j2me was a fantastic success
<SpaceHobo> it was my best hope to finally sink Java
<SpaceHobo> it went a lot better than the "killing Hitler" project
%
Everyone's so goddamn smart.
-- The Dane
%
<emad> all you people who voted early are stupid
<emad> what if we find out that obama is a secret muslim today
<emad> then you'll regret not voting for him
%
<clavicle> it's gigantic fucking banner season at wikipedia again
%
* fondue makes game notes
<fondue> I've identified the following fun things about this sort of game:
<fondue> 1. Blowing things up
<fondue> 2. Mowing down hordes of cheap enemies
<fondue> 3. Collecting shiny things
<fondue> 4. Cat and mouse battles against bosses
<fondue> 5. Chain reactions of stuff getting blown up, caught in crossfire, etc
<fondue> 6. Resultant wrecked, corpse strewn, bullet pocked, etc level
<fondue> 7. Ridiculous superweapons
<teferi> This is WoW?
<fondue> No, WoW would be
<fondue> 1. Numbers getting bigger
<fondue> 2. Paying money to make numbers get bigger
%
<Octal> Hey, my car is all paid off.
<Screwtape> I hate it when vehicles blackmail me.
%
* Octal unsubscribes from mailman-haters
<Octal> Is there a mailman-haters-haters list I can join?
%
Software is the only industry where the equivalent of adding a
six-lane automobile expressway to a railroad bridge could even be
classified as maintenance.
-- Paul D. Stachour
%
On the Big Rock Candy Station,
all the forcefields are offline,
and the cargs that aren't empty weight
carry rations and dreamwine.
The garden's trees are full of fruit,
and the Station crew have fled.
O I'm bound to go
where the rems are low
and the course is off
so the Feds won't know
'bout the Big Rock Candy Station.
-- squinky
%
<acomplexplan> > Until 2000, the neighborhood association's covenant said only
white people were allowed to live there, though an exception was
made for servants. The document, enacted in 1956, reads:
<acomplexplan> > "Said property shall be used and occupied by white persons
only except these covenants shall not prevent occupancy by
domestic servants of different race or nationality in the employ
of a tenant."
<acomplexplan> ^-- bush's new neighborhood
<Octal> acomplexplan: Don't act so surprised. He's leaving his current
property because a black family is moving in.
%
<emad> uh oh, human to lard communication has been proven possible
<emad> it is all downhill from here
<teferi> it's a slippery slope
<emad> yeah, it's like they greased the slope with something
%
CIA SUPERIOR
What did we learn, Palmer?
CIA OFFICER
I don't know, sir.
CIA SUPERIOR
I don't fuckin' know either. I guess we
learned not to do it again.
CIA OFFICER
Yes sir.
CIA SUPERIOR
But I'm fucked if I know what we did.
CIA OFFICER
Yes, sir, it's... hard to say.
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
CHAD
Manolo. You *didn't* find this.
MANOLO
I find it on the floor there.
CHAD
Yeah, I know, but...
MANOLO
Right there on the floor there. Just *lying* there.
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
CHAD
I'm sorry I'm calling at such an hour, but...
I thought you might be worried...
COX
Worried?
CHAD
About the security... of your shit.
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
CHAD
Why so uptight, Osbourne Cox?
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
CHAD
That's just a Kryptonite lock! You can open
those fuckers with a Bic pen!
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
KATIE
(vigourously tapping the table)
I don't *hammer*!
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
HARRY
Oh my fuck! I killed a fuckin' spook!
What the fuck are you doing here, you fucker?
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
CIA OFFICER
And we'll interface with the FBI on this
dead body...
CIA SUPERIOR
No, no. God, no. We don't want those
idiots bumbling around in this. Burn the
body, get rid of it.
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
CIA SUPERIOR
Keep an eye on everyone, see what they do.
Report back to me when, ah...
I don't know. When it makes sense.
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
HARRY
My wife hired you?
TUCHMAN MARSH MAN
No, your wife hired Tuchman Marsh. Tuchman
Marsh hired me. I work for Tuchman Marsh.
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
CIA OFFICER
Don't know why he was trying to go to Venezuela...
CIA SUPERIOR
You don't know.
CIA OFFICER
No, sir.
CIA SUPERIOR
We have no extradition with Venezuela.
CIA OFFICER
Oh... So what should be do with him?
CIA SUPERIOR
For fuck's sake, put him on the next flight to Venezuela.
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
SENIOR RUSSIAN EMBASSY MAN
There is more material?
LINDA
Oh, there's a *lot* more. But we want to be paid first.
SENIOR RUSSIAN EMBASSY MAN
You are not ideological?
CHAD
I don't... think so...
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
MARYLIN
I must say, for someone in your line of work,
you don't exhibit a great deal of... tact.
GUS PETCH
You want tact, call a tactician. You want
a ass nailed, you call Gus Petch!
-- Intolerable Cruelty (2003)
%
<jotun> i know all things. ask me anything.
<nukle> why?
<jotun> cuz.
<nukle> wow
%
MOSS
If I don't come back, you tell Mother I love her.
CARLA JEAN
Your mother's dead, Llewelyn.
MOSS
Well then I'll tell her myself.
-- No Country For Old Men (2007)
%
SHERIFF BELL
You ride Winston.
DEPUTY WENDELL
You sure?
SHERIFF BELL
Oh I'm more than sure. Anything happens to
Loretta's horse out here I can tell you right now I
don't want to be the party that was aboard.
-- No Country For Old Men (2007)
%
DEPUTY WENDELL
Well it's a mess, ain't it Sheriff?
SHERIFF BELL
If it ain't it'll do 'til the mess gets here.
-- No Country For Old Men (2007)
%
CHIGURH
If the rule you followed brought you to this,
of what use was the rule?
-- No Country For Old Men (2007)
%
ELLIS
You can't stop what's coming. It ain't all
waitin' on you. That's vanity.
-- No Country For Old Men (2007)
%
TOM
What's the rumpus?
VERNA
I was just in the neighborhood, feeling a
little daffy. What are you doing?
TOM
Walking.
VERNA
Don't let on more than you have to.
TOM
In the rain.
-- Miller's Crossing (1990)
%
<Screwtape> There's a GTK theme that draws itself using the current Qt theme,
but not the other way around, sadly.
<Screwtape> HEY QT, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO INTEGRATE INTO THE NATIVE GUI IN CASE
YOU HADN'T HEARD.
%
<purplekitten> is it legal to kill your husband if he keeps playing 1950s
adverts for tractors at you?
<fuzzie> i'm sure it should be.
<purplekitten> that's good enough for me
<philb> independent PTOs, hydraulics with get up and go
%
The Torture Convention was signed by dozens of states which
still torture, by Chile while Pinochet himself was still head
of state and could never have intended to provide for his own
arrest, and by the government of Mrs Thatcher, the General's
most effusive supporter. The General's tactics of objecting
to judges who might know about human rights produced an
apolitical bench who, with an almost touching naivety, took
the Torture Convention to mean what it said. With uncanny,
uncynical decency, they proceeded to hoist the old torturer by
his own petard.
-- Geoffrey Robertson, "Crimes Against Humanity"
regarding _Pinochet (No. 3)_
%
You're on the inside of the inside of the inside, and there is nothing here.
-- Stephen Bury, "The Cobweb"
%
<fo0bar> > government sources indicate pilot hit a flock of geese
<emad> hate crimes against geese-americans have risen two fold in the last hour
%
>>>>> "SSHM" == Snatcherus Spockitus Hillbillicus Maximus <snatcher@pigdog.org> writes:
SSHM> Agh. I'm alone here in Iowa, trapped down in the cellar.
Holy crap! Are they having tornadoes and crap, per Bernard Vonnegut?
Or is there some kind of pogrom occuring in the streets of Ioway
City!?
You gotta get outta there, man! Get out while the getting's
good. Whatever you do, don't head for the Quad Cities. They're a pack
of murderous thieves there who would strip a blond California boy like
you and make you their secret sweet honey bitch. They'd probably keep
you naked on a chain in the backyard like an animal, only letting you
out of the icy cold for buggery and occasional shearings.
SSHM> for the people in Indiana, it's earlier, I think. But I
SSHM> don't know.
Indiana does not partake in American time due to their slavish
devotion to International Communism.
SSHM> Tonight we had some new arivals from Indiana, and they are
SSHM> pretending to be fast asleep.
They are probably having a Communist cell meeting by telepathy. As you
know, the Soviet Union perfected telepathic communication in the 1950s
and worldwide Communists use the technique to distribute spy
information while appearing to talk about basketball.
I recommend that you cloud your brainwaves with strong whiskey to
prevent intrusion. Using GPG for all intrabrain communication is also
recommended.
Need I remind you that Bob Crane's killer was never brought to
justice?
SSHM> i've been hiding all day, trying not to get involved in all
SSHM> the grand super shit, and end up the focus of someone's
SSHM> family politics. They are just waiting for that.
"You, sir, are stupendously fat. I would conjecture that, with your
immense glutenous torso and tiny waving vestigial arm limbs, you're
unable to wipe your own ass. Am I correct?"
SSHM> Yet there is no escape. I've set myself up for this. I
SSHM> can't complain!
No, that is the one thing you CAN do. I suggest that you revel in it.
SSHM> Ugh. I can't even smoke anymore. I've convinced myself
SSHM> that all the things that ground me and give any sort of
SSHM> confort are deadly evilness killers -- which just goes to
SSHM> show...
You're farther gone than I had feared.
SSHM> Fuck! I just realized, you people all hate me.
Yes, but we OWE you. That makes us the most dangerous factor in your
life at the moment, but RIGHT NOW WE'RE THE ONLY HOPE YOU HAVE. You
must follow these directions TO THE LETTER or all is lost.
1.) CLEANSE YOUR BOWELS. Impacted bowels are an impediment to the
crystal clear thinking and lightning reflexes which you will need
over the next 8 hours if you are to survive. I cannot emphasize this
strongly enough.
2.) DISGUISE. You must disguise your pasty features, because they
stand out like a beacon. Take a black magic marker and blacken your
face and hands COMPLETELY. Leave no unmarked areas, however
small. If any other flesh around your waist or ankles is exposed, it
must be disguised, also. NOTE*NOTE*NOTE: DO NOT I repeat DO NOT use
one of those magic markers that smells like licorice. This will
attract the dogs and disclose your whereabouts.
3.) PREEMPTIVE STRIKE. In order to stay one step ahead of the enemy
you *must* take the initiative. Climb up the drainpipe on the
outside of the building (do not take the stairs! That's what they
EXPECT you to do) and into the bedroom of the Indiana
Communists. Plunge a mechanical pencil with a swift, wrist-twisting
motion into the right ear of each Communist in turn, starting with
the largest and working your way down to the smallest.
ONE STROKE is all you get. You must disable their telepathy centers
before they can awaken and warn their colleagues or notify their
taskmasters in Moscow. Do NOT use a Bic ballpoint pen, as they lack
structural integrity and will shatter on impact. I recommend if at
all possible you practice on the leftover turkey in the kitchen
refridgerator before executing this maneuver. Plunge... and TWIST!
Plunge... and TWIST! It should become as second nature to you.
It may help to do some capoeira exercises to calm your mind and
strengthen your resolve.
3.) ESCAPE. Run with all your might to the West, where you have
allies. Keep to the fields and avoid human habitation such as
farmhouses and townlets -- remember, William Pickard was turned in
by a bucktoothed farmer. Country people hate our kind.
Live off the land. Think like a wild beast. Clothe yourself in furs
and corn husks. The day is your enemy and the night is your
friend. Keep moving at all times.
SSHM> So fuck an a.
There will be time for that later. Now, you must act!
~Mr. Bad
--
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
/\____/\ Mr. Bad <mr.bad at pigdog.org>
\ / Pigdog Journal | http://pigdog.org/ | *Stay*Real*Bad*
| (X \x)
( ((**) "If it's not bad, don't do it.
\ <vvv> If it's not crazy, don't say it." - Ben Franklin
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
%
Web 2.0 is where you have to read TechCrunch every morning
to know if you'll be able to get your files that day.
-- Don Marti
%
<Octal> Just remember not to troll the Slackware guys so much you forget about
the Gentoo guys.
<clavicle> this stuff trolls itself.
<Octal> Well, that would result in some sort of perpetual trolling, which
clearly violates the first law of trollodynamics.
<Octal> or is it the second law? I can never remember.
%
<ckape> Well of course you're going to get collisions when you use one-bit SHA.
%
<jotun> i am a bear. see these claws?
<Rattus> those are pastries
<jotun> ah.
%
<meat> oh man
<meat> oh hey wait
* meat puffs up his cheeks, grunts
*** meat is now known as squinky
*** mode/#tron [+o squinky] by ChanServ
* squinky exhales
%
The future having different opinions than the present is making it
REALLY HARD for me to be popular across all possible timelines.
-- T. Rex
%
<squinky> hey SpaceHobo
<Dumont> the users say that SpaceHobo is tenacious as a Spartan ferret
<SpaceHobo> hi squinky
<Dumont> Squinky doesn't live on the Internet; he lives under it.
%
<eythian> Why have you failed me, svn?
<fuzzie> eythian: ask not why svn has failed you, ask instead why you have
failed at version control?
%
<mjog> ䷐
<mjog> ䷃
<mjog> ䷏
<mjog> ䷞
<mjog> ䷲
<mjog> ^-- lost highway
<mjog> wait, I need a dwarf
%
Broken gets fixed, but shoddy is forever.
%
<teferi> okay, I drank water and ate salty things and everyone around
me is still an asshole
<teferi> what else am I missing?
%
In 20 years, Jeff Atwood won't be useful any longer, but XML probably will be.
-- Slava Pestov
%
<ckape> It always feels less muggy when you're the one doing the mugging.
%
<teferi> my Steam game files need to be defragmented?!
<teferi> is it 1990 again?
<sneakums> teferi: well, you're using 1990 filesystem.
<teferi> sneakums: it's NTFS!
<teferi> ...oh.
%
<Screwtape> "Our users will know fear and cower before our software. Ship it!
Ship it, and let them flee like the dogs they are!"
<Screwtape> I'm going to assume my code-review was approved.
%
<teferi> querying mnesia tables is...interesting.
<neale> try querying mensa tables sometime
<neale> MENSA
<neale> ...
<Dumont> [You feel your magic energy drain away.]
<neale> meh.
%
<mjog> I wonder what the 'D' in "DAWS" stands for?
<Screwtape> "Digital", apparently.
<mjog> oh
<Screwtape> Assuming you mean "Digital Audio WorkStation"
<mjog> that's dissapointing
<Screwtape> No, I'm pretty sure it's "Digital".
%
Okay, so let's assume you
know the position of every
air molecule in the room.
Things are
going pretty
well for you,
my friend!
-- T. Rex
%
November sunshine
The shitheads are on the run
Barack Obama
-- Samuel Sweelsen
%
<ckape> Man, I went through clickolinko and now my computer is full of lobsters
%
The only scenario for which [NFS over] UDP is useful is one
where you don't like your data anymore.
-- Greg Banks
%
<ckape> Obama ends the war on science. The only war we were actually winning.
%
<oneiros> gentlemen
<oneiros> I retract the previously administered cockslap
%
<emad> man
<emad> microblogging is great
<emad> i can say anything i want
<emad> and people have to read it
%
* philb clicks on "see all items" on ebay
<philb> I may be some time
%
<fo0bar> http://twitter.com/fo0bar <-- I am not german :(
<ckape> fo0bar: That's horrible! People might go to the other fo0bar on
twitter and mistakenly think you have a girlfriend.
%
Oh daaaaaamn!
I'm at the
absolute peak
of my fried
chicken cycle,
dudes!
-- T. Rex
%
<deejoe> be bop beluga
%
<teferi> someone forked cvs?!
<teferi> cvsnt?!?!?!?!?!
<teferi> WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
<ckape> If only they had forked something easier to merge.
%
<philb> the digg bar is ridiculous, or as they say on digg, rediculous
%
<clavicle> elsevier? but I've hardly reviewed 'er
%
* Randall reads the Wikipedia article on hangovers while swigging more gin
%
<clavicle> so the federal government is like sid
<clavicle> most states release stable kinda often
<clavicle> but some are still stuck on potato
%
<teferi> my boss hosts a monthly "Y+30" meetup. it's as awful as it sounds
<clavicle> in 2039, this computer will be... useless! *smashes 32 bit machine
lying around the room*
%
<SpaceHobo> Dumont: 30386 / 0.4
<Dumont> a suffusion of yellow
<SpaceHobo> fuck off
<Dumont> Fuck YOU, sir.
%
The world hadn't ever had so many moving parts or so few labels.
-- William Gibson
%
<mjog> my main complaint with distros that aren't based on debian is
that they're not based on debian
%
<emad> that's an emad
<emad> in the literal sense
<emad> eating a piece of feta with mini pitas
<emad> TEXAS STYLE
%
Neonlicht
schimmerndes Neonlicht
und wenn die Nacht anbricht
ist diese Stadt aus Licht
%
Erik Naggum
1965 - 2009
The purpose of human existence is to learn
and to understand as much as we can of
what came before us, so we can further the
sum total of human knowledge in our life.
%
We are musical workers in the electronic garden.
-- Ralf Hütter
%
You can't be an artist one day a week.
-- Paul Rand
%
Ladies and gentlemen, I have a very important announcement: this
is not the last helicopter out of Saigon. I repeat, this is not
the last helicopter out of Saigon. There will be another train
after this one, and another one after that.
-- Conductor, downtown 2 train
%
Even a bad logo shouldn't be changed except for very good reasons.
Because a logo doesn't represent a company. The company represents
the logo. If you're a lousy company, your logo is useless, no matter
how well designed. If your logo is good, and you're a good company,
you have an ideal situation. If the company is bad, it's a bad logo.
So the idea of changing a logo without recognizing the importance of
the change is stupid.
-- Paul Rand
%
<Randall> *pant*
<Randall> *pant*
<Randall> I heard
<Randall> I heard you were arguing
<Randall> about Crocs
<Randall> *pant*
<Randall> I came as soon
<Randall> *pant*
<Randall> as I could.
%
He was your Elvis, and when your
Elvis dies, so does the private lie
that someday you will be young
once again, and feel at capricious
intervals the weightlessness of a
joy that is unchecked by the injuries
of experience and failure.
In other words, you two died a
bit today.
Welcome to the only game in town.
-- Cornelius Bear
in conversation with Roast Beef and Téodor
regarding Michael Jackson
%
<bz2> Torrent fans will just hop to the Next Big Site.
<bz2> They've been doing that for years.
<atob> Hoping that each hop is the hop home.
%
STACY
This is un-fuckin'-professional, man.
AVERY
Well you see a successful man like me has
limitations. I lose touch of the street
level, so I have to depend on a smart boy like
you, a lot closer to the nitty and the gritty
than I am.
STACY
Hey fuck you, mister whatever-your-name-is,
all right? This is a lifestyle I embrace.
AVERY
That's why I'm letting you take care of this.
You see, I'm the one with appearances to
maintain, but who gives a shit about you? Not
even God. Get it done.
AVERY rises to leave.
STACY
Get a tie.
-- The Limey (1999)
%
UNCLE JOHN
How much?
STACY
Five grand.
UNCLE JOHN
Heh-hey!
STACY
Got half in my pocket.
UNCLE JOHN
Makin' trouble for someone?
STACY
Yep.
UNCLE JOHN
Which kind?
STACY
The forever kind.
-- The Limey (1999)
%
ELAINE
Do you even remember the last time you saw her?
WILSON
I remember every time I saw her. I watched
her grow up. In increments...
-- The Limey (1999)
%
HEAD DEA AGENT
There's one thing I don't understand.
The thing I don't understand is every
motherfucking word you're saying.
-- The Limey (1999)
%
WILSON
In the past, granted, I have been known to
redistribute wealth. But no. I'm after
another kind of... satisfaction.
-- The Limey (1999)
%
WILSON
The last load of friends I had, well...
Turned out they weren't my friends after all...
-- The Limey (1999)
%
COX
I have a drinking problem?
PALMER
Ah... This doesn't have to be... unpleasant...
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
COX
We were young, and we were committed, and
there was nothing we could not do...
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
HARRY
I should try to get a run in.
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
GYM PATRON
Something snapped in my ass!
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
CHAD
I think that's the *shit*, man!
The *raw* intelligence!
-- Burn After Reading (2008)
%
<ckape> Are you the droids I'm looking for?
<ckape> You have to tell me if you are.
%
VALENTINE
"Tell 'em I'm coming"?
AVERY
"Tell *him* I'm coming".
VALENTINE
*Who*?
AVERY
Nobody knows.
-- The Limey (1999)
%
VALENTINE
Oh, fuck you, Jim. I don't freak out anymore.
-- The Limey (1999)
%
WILSON
Me, I.D.? No. No, when your chaps went
through my pockets there was nothing there.
-- The Limey (1999)
%
HITLER's pager goes off. He removes it from his pocket and
examines the screen.
HITLER
Fuckin' Goebbels. Thinks it's a toy.
He shows the screen to one of his guards.
"Gone to get haircut." What an asshole.
-- Full Frontal (2002)
%
<SpaceHobo> fo0bar: upgrade your super nintendo to protect against impotence-3
<fo0bar> ask your doctor if you're healthy enough for Game Genie.
%
Errors were encountered while processing:
dbus
consolekit
dbus-x11
gconf2-common
libgconf2-4
gconf-defaults-service
gconf2
E: Sub-process /usr/bin/dpkg returned an error code (1)
%
<neale> OH SHIT THE SPACE SHUTTLE JUST LOST TWO ENGINES
<teferi> neale: you mean, booster separation happened?
<neale> yeah, something called a "solid rocket booster"
<neale> FUCK FUCK FUCK
%
<clavicle> [11274.993142] Too big adjustment 32
<clavicle> [12677.659660] Too big adjustment 32
<clavicle> [12677.678200] Too big adjustment 32
<clavicle> ^-- Whut.
<sneakums> what a useless message
<sneakums> ./sound/pci/hda/hda_intel.c:1135: snd_printk(KERN_WARNING SFX "Too big adjustment %d\n",
<ckape> Uh oh, kerning warning.
<ckape> Better fix your fonts.
%
<eythian> So, who is going to go to LCA2010?
<mjog> where is it?
<sneakums> mjog: Wellington
<fo0bar> man, why do they hold it in australia every year?
%
With the BSDs having long supported Linux binaries (through
a compatibility layer) and the main x86 Unix vendors having
added support for the format, the project decided that Linux
ELF was the format chosen by the industry and "declare[d]
itself dissolved" on July 25, 1999.
-- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Executable_and_Linkable_Format#History
%
I like my fiction ... well, that's about it: I like my
fiction. Episodic? Narrative? Who could care less?
-- M.A. Orthofer
%
A London taxi is a flying bomb.
The comparison rose in him slowly, from deep in his unconscious
memory. The clatter as it barges into the crescent, the metric
tick-tick as the bass notes die. The cut-off: where has it stopped,
which house, when all of us in the street are waiting in the dark,
crouching under tables or clutching pieces of string, which house?
Then the slam of the door, the explosive anti-climax: if you can hear
it, it's not for you.
But Smiley heard it, and it was for him.
-- John le Carré, "Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy"
%
What's the go of it?
-- James Clerk Maxwell
%
Vigor, Vitality, Vim and Punch--
That's /Pep!/
The courage to act on a sudden hunch--
That's /Pep!/
The nerve to tackle the hardest thing
With feet that climb and hands that cling,
And a heart that never forgets to sing--
That's /Pep!/
Sand and grit on a concrete base--
That's /Pep!/
Friendly smile on an honest face--
That's /Pep!/
The spirit that helps when another's down,
That knows how to scatter the darkest frown,
That loves its neighbor and loves its town--
That's /Pep!/
To say "I will" for you know you can--
That's /Pep!/
To look for the best in every man--
That's /Pep!/
To meet each thundering knockout blow
And come back with a laugh, for well you know
You'll get the best of the whole darn show--
That's /Pep!/
-- Grace G. Bostwick
%
ARCTOR (V.O.)
The pain, so unexpected and undeserved, had for
some reason cleared away the cobwebs. I realized I
didn't hate the cabinet door. I hated my life, my
house, my family, my back yard, my power mower.
Nothing would ever change. Nothing new could ever
be expected. It had to end, and it did.
Now in the dark world where I dwell, ugly
things and surprising things and sometimes little
wondrous things spill out at me constantly, and I
can count on nothing.
-- A Scanner Darkly (2006)
%
There is no difference between passive resistance
and passive collaboration -- it's the same thing.
-- W. G. Sebald
%
ARCTOR (V.O.)
What does a scanner see? Into the head? Down into
the heart? Does it see into me? Into us? Clearly or
darkly? I hope it sees clearly because I can't any
longer see into myself. I see only murk. I hope for
everyone's sake the scanners do better, because if the
scanner sees only darkly the way I do, then I'm cursed,
and cursed again, and will only wind up dead this way,
knowing very little, and getting that little fragment
wrong too.
-- A Scanner Darkly (2006)
%
I don't know much about science, but I know what I like.
-- Martin Amis
%
<emad> i just dont recall seeing an amoeba
<emad> like i've seen salt
<emad> but i guess we don't have amoeba shakers
%
<philb> how do you feel about "could care less"?
<jotun> i could kill more
%
<jotun> why doesn't anyone tell garrison keillor that he can't sing?
<res0> probably the same reason nobody's told you you can't write code
<res0> it's your job, and it doesn't really hurt anything
%
<clavicle> señor network administrator
<clavicle> must have own sombrero
%
The Hurd's design is so secure that it makes firewalls immoral.
-- Jeroen Dekkers
%
Anything that doesn't take years of your life and
drive you to suicide hardly seems worth doing.
-- Cormac McCarthy
%
<teferi> god, joe lieberman is such a wanker
<Dumont> i already had it that way, teferi.
%
<ckape> All of this talk of irrational British disdain for the US is
reminding me that I haven't watched the previous Top Gear yet.
<ckape> NO SPOILERS
<ckape> Well, there will probably be some spoilers, it is a car show.
%
<SpaceHobo> hobos totally work
<SpaceHobo> bums don't work
<SpaceHobo> hobos travel and work
<SpaceHobo> tramps just travel
<SpaceHobo> bums stay put
<SpaceHobo> it's all in the handbook
%
<sneakums> config EXT4_USE_FOR_EXT23
<Octal> Shit, when did we get up to ext23?
%
INTERVIEWER
People say Eleanor is the brains behind
Team Zissou. What's Steve?
ESTEBAN
He's the Zissou!
-- The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou (2004)
%
<Octal> I don't mind the cake thing so much, but I was really looking
forward to that grief counseling.
%
<sarah> lookit dat fukken owl
* rasher looks
<rasher> END OF ASSIST
%
I recently bought a fountain pen. it cost the equivalent of about 1500
throw-away ball pens. 1500 ball pens would have made me very frustrated,
but this sleek, elegant pen made me happy. I also choose Common Lisp.
-- Erik Naggum
%
The ultimate laziness is not using Perl. That saves you so
much work you wouldn't believe it if you had never tried it.
-- Erik Naggum
%
<emad> tell it to the jury, the defendant and the plaintiff
<emad> ... court reporter
<emad> and the judge
<emad> you know what, go ahead and get on the witness stand and say it
in open court, it will be much more efficient that way
%
<neale> woooooooooooooo
<neale> it came up
<sneakums> that's what she said
<emad> nope, i just checked the logs
<emad> only neale said it
<emad> are you talking about another channel?
%
<sneakums> kernel/futex.c | 30 +++++-
<sneakums> just what i like to see just before release, changes to
core kernel primitives
<emad> futex.c is there because linus really hated texas
%
<teferi> it's sorta nice how everyone who's touched ESAPI has listed
the names of their companies in the code
<teferi> because now I have a nice list of companies to avoid like the plague
%
It's kind of like banking: overcommit off is proper banking,
overcommit on is modern Western banking.
-- Alan Cox
%
<neale> sarah: you didn't used to be so acerbic
<sarah> well, a couple of years ago I started hanging out with jerks
<sarah> then I married one
%
Consciousness is a useful technique and even an entertaining hobby,
but a little goes a long way. It doesn't do to make a fetish of it.
-- Adam Mars-Jones
%
<fuzzie> i imagine you would want to skip to about the half-way point
for it to be at all interesting.
<fuzzie> and his blog posts says the last third of the recording is
useless.
<rasher> so one sixth is interesting? (hope I got this right)
<bz2> You mathematician you.
* teferi pins a "math nerd" badge on rasher
%
<MisterBad> I always feel funny when people say, "My bad."
<MisterBad> I feel like I should have a snappy comeback for that, but I don't.
%
<@kfx> acme is basically rob pike sneaking into your toolbox at night
and replacing everything inside with identical white dildoes,
some of which explode when you touch them
%
Balls.
-- X11R5
%
> I very much remember how Qemu looked like _before_ KVM: it was
> a struggling, dying project. KVM clearly changed that.
I'm a hero.
-- Avi Kivity
%
Object-Relational Mappers are the Vietnam of computer science.
-- Ted Neward
%
<teferi> god, it's such a relief not to be using maven anymore
<teferi> yes, ant is an improvement over it.
<teferi> obnoxiously verbose xml and all.
<oneiros> I don't think I can do any of that on my iPad!
%
<fo0bar> the damn cheap bastard ISP only gave me a /112! what the
hell am I going to do with only 65,535 IPs?
%
<bz2> I went to see an Interpol concert once, it was terrible.
<rasher> Everyone got arrested and extradited.
%
It was a filthy profession, but the money was addicting, and
one addiction led to another, and they were all going to hell.
-- Po Bronson, "Bombardiers"
%
<tjfontaine> jim henson company is hiring a jr sysad with debian and
python experience
<teferi> must be comfortable with puppet
%
<teferi> If you search its archives online, do you get abstracts of
papers published in Concrete Quarterly?
%
<teferi> after the street sploded, we all went to the bar
<teferi> where our crazy canadian was buying pitchers of brooklyner lager
<rasher> the street sploded?
<teferi> 's not my fault the street exploded
<rasher> what happen
<teferi> the street exploded!
%
<rasher> Okay, irc with the on-screen keyboard is sort I'd acceptable
<Screwtape> ...
<Screwtape> I'll read that as "not acceptable"
%
<sneakums> man that Rakefile is the worst thing ever
<SpaceHobo> I hate that make has invisible syntax and yet it remains
the best option
<sneakums> do make(1) say think
<rasher> do make(1) cowsay(6) think
%
*** SpaceHobo is now known as chief
<chum> i wish i'd chosen chief
<chief> so did I
<chief> then I made it happen
%
SCOTT
Look, you go home, some wave their hats,
some turn their backs. It's all the same.
None of 'em know where you've been. It's
all the same.
-- Spartan (2004)
%
<Zen> You can't win EVERY argument with empirical evidence.
<Zen> You can with theory.
<teferi> depends on how you define "win", isn't it?
<Zen> I'm still defining "is"
<Zen> so go figure.
%
The Application, Presentation, and Session layers turn out to be so
closely related that the best thing to do is to have one big state
machine for all three layers rather than implementing a separate state
machine for each. So, in the upper layers, we feel that the layering
structure of the OSI model is not quite right; I think you'll find
very few people who disagree with that. Nevertheless, it's something
we have to live with because we realize it would be impossible at this
point to make radical changes to the OSI model.
-- DECnet Phase V: An OSI Implementation (1992)
%
The Data Link service is much more of an architectural abstraction
than, say, the Network layer service. This is because, in reality, the
service the Data Link layer supplies is very dependent on the type of
data link used. Frankly, ISO 8886 really exists only because of the
feeling that every layer "ought to have" a single service definition.
-- DECnet Phase V: An OSI Implementation (1992)
%
<X11R5> Dear @ato_gov_au, not everyone has to imagine Screwtape
sipping Bacardi.
%
<neale> hi clavicle. what are you doing with your slug?
<clavicle> I guess the most immediate benefit from it is uptime
bragging.
<clavicle> oh christ it rebooted somehow
<clavicle> this is terrible.
%
<xternal> I want to see a war between a childfree group, and a quiverful group
<Thirteen> you can
<Thirteen> it's called AMERICA
%
<X11R5> Brasilia is in amsterdamnation.
<ckape> X11R5: I don't know where you learned your geography, but it
is perfect.
%
HUDSUCKER
(gesturing at halo)
How d'you like that thing? They're all
wearin' 'em upstairs.
(dismissively)
It's a fad.
-- The Hudsucker Proxy (1994)
%
BARRINGER
Chuck, what are your hobbies?
CHUCKIE
Baseball!
BARRINGER
Baseball!... Chuckie...
That's the national sport.
-- State And Main (2000)
%
WALT
This is what my people died for: the right
to make a movie in THIS town!
-- State And Main (2000)
%
JOE
How do I do a film called "The Old Mill"
when I don't have an old mill?
ANN
Well first you gotta change the title.
-- State And Main (2000)
%
WALT
How are we coming with the dead horse scene?
MARTY
You can't actually kill the horse.
WALT
Oh, FUCK me!
-- State And Main (2000)
%
MARTY
Don't flinch while I'm talking to you, you
speed-trap shegetz!
-- State And Main (2000)
%
Oh, to be back in Hollywood, wishing I was back in New York.
-- Herman J. Mankiewicz
%
<Screwtape> ♫ To fourteen-hundred and ninety-two / Columbus configured his MTU ♪
%
When all of human endeavor falls under the rubric of the "hack" the
word ceases to mean anything.
Hack your commute, take public transit! Hack your next dinner party
with parlour games. Delightfully clever key hack keeps all your keys
on the same ring. Hack Mexican food with a "burrito" sized tortilla!
Hack your brain with REM sleep. Hack the sun with a straw hat. Hack
hygiene with silver oxide "deodorant". Hack girls with compliments.
Hack your windowsill with a pot of wheatgrass, and hack the sky with
the goddamn moon.
It's stupid. Take a walk.
-- http://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=1590621
%
You are obliged to go off at a tangent if you
want to stop going round in circles.
-- Alan Fletcher
%
"What then?"
"I beg your pardon?"
"Suppose you find King Solomon's Gold in Shive Tor and bring
it home to your laboratory, and extract the Philosophic Mercury
from it -- that's it, then, isn't it?"
"That's /what/, then?"
"It's the End of the World or something, it is the Apocalypse,
you've solved the riddle, found God's presence on Earth, the
secret of eternal life -- really this entire /conversation/ is
idle, in a sense -- none of it /matters/, does it?"
"There is no telling," Isaac said, in the soothing tones of
one who is trying to calm a madman. "My calculations from the
Book of Revelation suggest that the End of the World will not
occur until 1876."
-- Daniel Waterhouse and Issac Newton, in
Neal Stephenson's "The System Of The World"
%
HARD FINANCIAL ANALYSIS.
Téodor: Beef, what's the latest situation
with the stock market?
Roast Beef: Well some people had some
money and based on bein' idiots they
gave that money to some companies
which then proceeded to shit the bed
with the lights on
T.: What happened to these people and
their money?
R.B.: They got seriously dong-razzled
and now all of their "money" is
"away from them"
T.: So...screw them?
R.B.: Screw them, Téodor
T.: There you have it, folks.
Screw them.
-- Achewood, 2010-09-10
%
The Security Service Act of 1989 at last placed MI5 on a statutory
footing, elegantly sidestepping the contentious issue of the previous
legal basis for the Service's operations by the use of the brilliantly
equivocal formula "There shall continue to be a Security Service."
-- Christopher Andrew, "The Defence Of The Realm" p. 767
%
<ckape> When using a 12mm equivalent lens, be sure to wear nice shoes.
%
<teferi> we don't get leap days; we let it accumulate and
have an entire leap month
<teferi> so last year we had Tishrei and Tishrei II
<teferi> (electric boogaloo)
%
<rasher> My brain saw "fucking" and "inflatable" and just sort of shut down
%
<PEPPERON1> my T500 battery life is shit.
<PEPPERON1> ubantos 10.10
<PEPPERON1> wat do
%
<emad> show me on the ipad where he multitouched you
%
Q: [...] Was the ES4 proposal your chance to show the world that,
"Look, I'm a really smart guy and JavaScript is a really good
language"?
A: No, I don't think so. I know Doug [Crockford] may think that.
I don't think Doug knows me that well, but the thing is, I'm not
really looking for respect, especially from the Java-heads or the
trailing edge.
-- Brendan Eich to Peter Seibel,
"Coders at Work" p. 143
%
<fo0bar> are you a bad enough dude to pass signals at danger?
%
The thing is, Intel did really well for _years_ with just defining
hardware interfaces. The PIIX IDE controller interfaces were a great
success, and worked for over a decade. So here's a question for you:
"After having done something successfully for a decade, what do you do?
Do you
(a) Try to emulate a known successful strategy?
(b) Put a committee together to try to come up with a new and more
'generic' solution, since you were only successful for closer to
fifteen years."
Guess which one is ACPI.
-- Linus Torvalds
%
It's very tiring having other people tell you how much
they dig you if you yourself don't dig you.
-- Bob Dylan
%
<sneakums> goddamn dingbats
<Screwtape> WE CAN'T STOP HERE THIS IS DINGBAT COUNTRY
%
<clavicle> guys, what's your favorite agile shell scripting framework?
%
<sneakums> good news, everybody! I've been designated owner of the
"slags" livejournal community!
* Octal assumes it was a hostile takeover.
<Octal> Since sneakums is almost always hostile.
%
<sneakums> i got a tote at the tate, but not a tate tote.
<Screwtape> If you put a potato in your tote, that makes you a Tater Toter.
<Screwtape> If you trumpet your tater-toting, that makes you a Tater Toter Tooter.
<fondue> booo get off the stage
<Screwtape> If your tater-toting proclamations are made with phatter rhymes
than your competition, that makes you a Tighter Tater Toter Tooter.
<Screwtape> That one's for fondue.
%
<sneakums> what the hell did they call those in ireland
<squinky> dude not to tell you your job, but you're the Irish one
<sneakums> well, i was never that into it
%
<sarah> who do I have to go back in time and assassinate to make it so
that you can see pictures and text without allowing javascript
%
<X11R5> It's only really used for something I catch myself when a
ghost's car title is being charged with other genres. For
instance: Cajun.
<X11R5> I pronounce that messily French though.
%
People ask you questions all day long, and if you're able
to answer them, you wind up with a movie.
-- Steven Soderbergh
%
<teferi> no, I don't want a PHP implementation, fucksniffers!
%
<blorpy> ah, i will probably be around
<blorpy> we can grab sandwiches
<blorpy> and if possible, eat them
%
<squinky> it spawned like 30 chickens and the server exploded
%
I think I don't have the right fonts installed for that site.
-- Merlin Mann, on Identica
"After Dark" #9, 5by5.tv
%
<fo0bar> Randall: Bethlehem would be considered Greater Philadelphia Area, right?
<Randall> fo0bar: No idea; I was near fo0bar as a kid.
%
<Screwtape> And you know *why* Python is the standard language in the
typography industry?
<Screwtape> It turns out one of the more influential commercial
enterprises in that industry happens to have an employee
named Juste van Rossum.
<Screwtape> Who needed a scripting language to automate some
font-design task some day, and decided to give his
brother's project a try.
%
ED (V.O.)
I don't know where I'm being taken. I don't
know what I'll find beyond the earth and sky.
But I'm not afraid to go. Maybe the things I
don't understand will be clearer there, like
when a fog blows away. Maybe Doris will be
there. And maybe there I can tell her all
those things they don't have words for here.
-- The Man Who Wasn't There (2001)
%
<Octal> Luckily a ton of Americans is fewer than you might first guess.
%
HAYDON
"Why?" You ask THAT? Because it was
NECESSARY, that's why! Someone had to!
-- Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy (1979)
%
ANN
Poor George. Life's such a puzzle to
you, isn't it?
-- Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy (1979)
%
test tones and
failed clones and
odd parts made you
%
<X11R5> That's a good case for sat navs.
<Screwtape> I don't even own one sat nav, let alone enough to
necessitate an entire case.
%
<sneakums> i was crossing vauxhall bridge on the last trip, and i
looked more to the left than i had ever done before, and
there it was
<sneakums> and i thought "oh"
<SpaceHobo> ha ha
<SpaceHobo> charade you are
%
<bdha> Fucking DNS.
<whack> fucking dns :(
%
Earn your voice.
-- M.G. Siegler
%
MAX
Couldn't... couldn't we just let me float by?
For old times' sake?
-- Rushmore (1998)
%
MAX
So you were in Vietnam, if I'm not mistaken?
MR. BLUME
Yeah.
MAX
Were you in the shit?
MR. BLUME
Yeah, I was in the shit.
-- Rushmore (1998)
%
<YC> Ah crap, form must be filled in capitals.
<phirate> you're fine, you're in wellington
%
<emad> i just had a search running for undersea rampage
<emad> until you showed up
%
<blorpy> you're going to like the way you think, i guarantee it
<blorpy> ^-- the motto for arkham asylum
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<Octal> Well, if these captchas are correct, it turns out I'm not
human after all.
<Octal> Sorry for any confusion.
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<fo0bar> the original idea was "hello rock stars", but that's been played out
<emad> mellow rock stars
<sneakums> apocalyptica: cello rock stars
<emad> bellow! rock stars
<sneakums> you're supposed to stop now because i made the best possible joke.
<emad> sneakums: but i didn't get it
<emad> what's apocalyptica
<Dumont> apocalyptica is three crazy germans who play metal with cellos
<emad> oh
<emad> i see
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16-bit Intel 8088 chip
with an Apple Macintosh
you can't run Radio Shack programs
in its disc drive.
nor can a Commodore 64
drive read a file
you have created on an
IBM Personal Computer.
both Kaypro and Osborne computers use
the CP/M operating system
but can't read each other's
handwriting
for they format (write
on) discs in different
ways.
the Tandy 2000 runs MS-DOS but
can't use most programs produced for
the IBM Personal Computer
unless certain
bits and bytes are
altered
but the wind still blows over
Savannah
and in the Spring
the turkey buzzard struts and
flounces before his
hens.
-- Charles Bukowski
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<emad> luke skywalker keeps trying to show blurry pictures of
chewbecca to prove he exists
%
<Beagl> Morning!
<sneakums> the damn things just keep on coming
<Beagl> They can't be argued with or reasoned with... and they will
not stop until you are dead.
%
BARRY
You gotta saddle up here and get things
under control.
MICHAEL
"Saddle up"?
-- Michael Clayton (2007)
%
MICHAEL
What would they do?
What would they do if he went public?
MARTY
"What would they do?"
Are you fucking soft? They're doing it!
-- Michael Clayton (2007)
%
ARTHUR
Michael, I have great affection for you.
You lead a very rich and interesting life,
but you're a bagman, not an attorney.
If you wanted to have me committed you
should have kept me in Wisconsin, where
the arrest report, the videotape and
eyewitness accounts of my inappropriate
behavior would have had jurisdictional
relevance.
I have no criminal record in the state
of New York. And the single determining
criterion for involuntary incarceration
is danger. Is the defendant a danger
to himself or others?
You think you got the horses for that?
Well, good luck and God bless.
-- Michael Clayton (2007)
%
CROWDER
Do you think it's doable?
VERNE
Yeah. We have some good ideas.
You say move, we move.
If the ideas don't look so good,
we back off, reassess...
CROWDER
Okay.
VERNE
Is that, "Okay, you understand",
or "Okay, proceed"?
-- Michael Clayton (2007)
%
MICHAEL
What are you telling me?
MARTY
That I'm counting on you.
I'm telling you that by this time next
week, Arthur will be under control and
everybody who needs to will have been
reminded of your infinite value.
MICHAEL
Jesus, Marty.
MARTY
Hey.
When did you get so fucking delicate?
-- Michael Clayton (2007)
%
“What’s that you keep reading?” asked Brown, unexpectedly,
from the other side of the screen.
“‘An elite of amoral supermen,’” Milgrim replied, surprised
to hear his own voice repeat the chapter title he’d just read.
“That’s what you all think,” said Brown, his attention
elsewhere. “Liberals.”
-- William Gibson, "Spook Country"
%
KELVIN (V.O.)
Earth. Even the word sounded strange to me now.
Unfamiliar. How long had I been gone? How long
had I been back? Did it matter? I tried to find
the rhythm of the world where I used to live.
I followed the current. I was silent and attentive.
I made a conscious effort to smile... nod... stand...
and perform the millions of gestures that constitute
life on Earth. I studied these gestures until they
became reflexes again. But I was haunted by the
idea that I remembered her wrong. That somehow I
was wrong about everything.
-- Solaris (2002)
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